Junkyardgirl, I've told you this before and I'll say it again (very nicely! lol) - get your thyroid antibodies checked girl! You have a goiter, you are depressed, tired and sleepy - all symptoms of Hypothyroidism. The majority of doctors won't test the antibodies (I went through about 7 doctors, including an endocrinologist to finally find a doctor who would check them). My numbers are all perfectly okay except for my antibodies - normal is like 30, mine were 5200! 1 week on Synthroid, the depression and anxiety attacks were gone! The other symptoms are slowing improving. It took me a long time to get diagnosed and it'll take a long time to heal. Go to the top thyroid doctors site and find another doctor. Ask for the thyroid antibodies test. IF it's fine, then try a different antidepressant. Good luck! Here is a link that might be useful: Top Docs

I can empathize so much. I don't have a family--I'm divorced and live alone with cats. Sometimes when one of the cats gets on furniture she doesn't belong on, I become enraged. I don't hit or hurt the cat, but the anger is way out of proportion to the actual occurrence. I let the cats on all the other furniture and just try to have one piece cat-hair-free, but my anger just boils up so fast and furiously when that's "violated" that I don't know who I am! I'm unemployed, with the position I loved having been taken by a man half my age for less pay and I don't have kids. I find myself wondering if the change in hormones (I went through menopause at 47) has made me less soft and gentle, which is my predominant state. My life, like everyone's, has good and bad in it, and most of the time I feel thankful for all I have, but there are times I could just scream at the littlest thing. It's just not the me I used to know!!

Oh, Cheerful1, that's a tough one because everyone is so different. It took me years to come to any kind of peace and understanding about myself and my humanity. It was kind of a combination of a psychological and spiritual search. I had to start at the beginning of my life, look at how I was raised, what my family dynamics were, what my core beliefs were, what my psychological needs were (for me it was approval and the need for unconditional love). Those may have been things that I never felt I had as a child, although I have really nice parents. I had to try and understand where my fears are rooted and face them. I had to learn how to be emotionally secure and what I call "adult" and feel secure with everything that I am, positive and negative. The biggest help to me was the study of Jungian psychology. It took a long time, and I had to give up some beliefs that I have had for 50 years. It's been a total transformation in my way of thinking and being, and it's been absolute hell until the last few months. I started journaling my dreams, writing poetry to express my emotional pain, and I am serious when I say I was pretty self-centered in my endeavor, but I realized that no-one can do it for me. I have to do it myself, and I can't tell you how liberating it has been. I surely hope you can find something that works for you. It opens up a whole new world. Sincerely, Mrs H

Lol- my mood swings change so fast, that I have teeth marks on my tongue from biting it so much! I don't know why I never read up on menopause before, it isn't like I never knew it would hit at some point- I guess I was too busy with the kids, and thinking diapers would never end, to think about menopause-lol- The mood swings are really difficult, I have to admit- and I find that I'm afraid of all of these strange changes, that I wasn't prepared for- it's just all so...different than what I've ever known- my metabolism is even changing- things I could eat before with no trouble at all (chocolate...one of the Top Food Groups- lol) give me either heartburn/fast heartbeat/sugar rush or all of the above- And of course, any oddball changes in periods freaks me out pretty good (as I'm sure it does a lot of women in here) because I see anything out of the norm as a cancer of one sort or another- of course, my cousin telling me all of that certainly didn't help at all- I should have remembered that she has always been the one to 'sound the warning bells' about anything and everything, lol- Thanks so much for answering back, and just....well, going through menopause as well- misery does indeed love company!!! lol~