I just discovered this thread. How are you doing, Deedee? I am sorry to read your story, and the others here, because I understand this tale so well. One thing that has not been mentioned is that anxiety and panic are physical; they are caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain and they are usually genetic. This affliction is not necessarily attached to menopause. I had my first panic attack in 1976 (I'll never forget it) and they are still going on (am now in my sixties). One thing that is crucial is a good therapist, preferably a psychiatrist, if you have insurance that will cover that. Because psychiatrists are MDs, they understand your entire health situation, and can prescribe the tests necessary to see what kinds of meds you can and can't handle. They also understand these meds in ways that no other therapist or doctor does. My first "therapist" was a psychiatric social worker. I was having trouble with a lot of anxiety most early mornings, as I was showering and doing my hair and makeup. This guy had me analyzing my "unhappiness" at being a woman and having to compete in the world while being "miserable" about myself. The makeup was the trigger, in his opinion. When I escaped from him and landed with a real shrink, the doc said, "Well of course you're having morning shakes; your system is running out of meds. Take the pill as soon as you get up, dissolve it under your tongue (gets into the bloodstream much faster than swallowing it), wait 10 minutes, and then shower, etc." And it worked. I am a huge believer in meds for those with debilitating panic. I take 1 1/2 mgs of Xanax every day, broken into 1/4 mg halves, which I work through during the day. I also take 30 mgs of Celexa, which for me is mainly a mood elevator. When I wailed years ago to my shrink of now 21 years that I was going to be on meds for the rest of my life, he said to think of it as being a diabetic or epileptic, conditions which could not be cured, but could be lived with. I had a high-stress career which I was determined to keep, teaching foreign language to the military, had to be "on" all the time in front of high-energy, hormone-driven soldiers, sailors, Marines, etc., and the meds enabled me to do that. Have been retired for six years and was dropping down on my meds. But in April I had the worst panic attack of my life, it sent me to an ER for an EKG, and since then, my meds are back up. And as others have mentioned, I am a sort of hermit, happiest at home, although I can get pretty jumpy just doing housework. Deedee - I understand about your feeling worst before you go out and then often being better once you're out. That's very common with people like us. Have no idea what the solution is, other than to tell oneself that it will pass. Oh, and being a perfectionist can also be a part of this syndrome. Since we can't be perfect, we are set up for seeing ourselves as failures. I don't suppose that going on disability is an option, is it? BTW, my husband takes Buspar. It helps, but not completely. He can be a nervous wreck, although to look at him you'd never know it. Wishing you good luck and a much improved situation...

Maybe I misunderstand, but it seems to me that if you have a chemical imbalance (supposedly helped by Prozac), you need to re-balance that all day, every day. Like you, DH was fine without Prozac long after it had completely washed out of his system. If you get anxious or depressed once in a great while (years between events) it doesn't seem to me that you have an ongoing chemical imbalance that Prozac could help. The depression or anxiety is not an ongoing daily problem, but *event* triggered. Absolutely. Chemical imabalances don't suddenly go away. Well perhaps a child could possibly grow out of them but an adult with a fully developed neural system? Unlikely. I believe too many people are put on medication to get them through "event" triggered depression/anxiety. I also believe that using chemical intervention could actually change the brain chemistry to the point where there is no going back. In layman's terms when you take SSRIs one pathway shuts and another may be opened. Once shut that pathway may never open again.

The gagging could be from what is called "silent reflux"... I didn't even know i had it until i went to the doctor with an ear ache which was also contributed to the reflux. When you are laying down the acid can creep up and then in turn make you cough and gag. I had nausea as well for many years from this and did not even know it. It is quite common in perimenopause as it relates to hormone fluctuations. I take an OTC Zegerid at night for the reflux and it has helped a lot. Also, not eating a few hours before going to bed may help as well. Not sure if this is what you have but it sounds like it to me. As for night sweats i found that at least 30 minutes of exercise a day, walking or running helped tremendously. It also helps with my anxiety and nervousness that also comes up out of nowhere at times. The only thing getting me through is the thought of making it to the finish line and this being over fairly soon... i hope! Good luck

I have a Thundershirt sized for my lab I will send you if you want to try one. She started getting phobic about fireworks and we had neighbors who would shoot off big aerial displays that rattled our windows and shook the house. It was kind of too little too late by that point and we have found other things that have helped more. Neighbors moved too, so we only have the distant fireworks for the most part and seem to be able to limit the valium to a half dose on the 4th and NYE. Anyway, we aren't using the Thundershirt now and if it could help, I'd be happy to send it to you. We also use Composure chews. In our case, I give them to the dogs for a day or two before the main fireworks holiday and a day or two after -- mainly to catch the folks who set them off for days. They do seem to help, but that alone is not enough. I also started using Hemp and Hips supplement chews after a co-worker was raving about a hemp supplement when she was talking with my DH. I researched them and decided to try this less expensive one first. We gave it to both dogs -- the lab to see if it helped with anxiety and general energy (she was 12) and the border collie for arthritis/joint support. It made a quick difference in both dogs, but we have backed off giving them to the lab on a regular basis because of other health issues. One thing I will tell you is that you can give a dog too much. After seeing how the dogs responded, DH bought a bag of hemp hearts at Costco. He used them regularly for a while and then stopped. I thought I might use some in the dog treats I make and then not have to buy the supplements. What I didn't stop to think about was dosing -- or the fact that with the boys home this summer, my brown-eyed beggar was getting an uncontrolled and increased dosing. We went through a couple thousand dollars in vet bills when she had accidents inside the house but didn't have a UTI. The docs were telling us she needed this test and then that one -- did an ultrasound looking for cancer, blood panels and specific tests. Something wasn't sitting right with me -- and I don't think the vets believe me, but I researched it and found that a high amount of hemp can cause incontinence. Back off the hemp though and things return to normal. It's worth trying -- and we're still using it, but with more awareness. I will also tell you that I realized that my lab got worse about fireworks after I got upset about the shaking windows and the fact that they were concerning the dogs or the fact that we were getting the glowing embers from their fireworks coming down in our yard during the summer of our worst drought. By seeing me get upset about her being upset, I was reinforcing her fears and telling her there was a real threat to be upset about. I started looking at ways to work on behavior modification and de sensitizing. Of course, that works best if you know what is causing her anxiety, but you can work on rewarding her for not losing it when she is starting to get anxious. I used distractions -- activity, TV on, training and giving her treats to give her positive things to associate with the c=sounds instead of all negative. It has helped a lot. We have gone from several days of having to medicate her in the evening to pretty much being able to use chews and treats and only having to use medication in a half dose once or twice each season. Sorry this is so long. Hope something here is helpful.