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candy21_gw

My Dad passed away

candy21
17 years ago

My Dad passed away in dec/04 and I still cry daily as I miss him dearly. I feel all alone like the only person who truly loved me is gone and lost forever. Makes me feel so empty sometimes, so lost, so sad. I feel like I am turning around and around in circles. Everything and everyone reminds me of Dad, what do I do. Where do I put these feelings I have, where will my love for my Dad go now? It seems my feelings are lost in my heart and don't know where to go. I wear his chain around my neck so I can grasp it when I need to feel him close to me. I wish I could tell Dad one more time how much I miss him and wish he was here. He was my best friend. I don't understand what life is all about when you have to lose the ones you love the most. It is such a waste. Dad's stories are gone forever but I still his his voice. It seems that nobody understands. A friend of mine asked the other day how I was doing, in the same breath she said it must being getting better. It is not better it is just different. All my lost feelings are consuming my body and mind. I think that if I stop thinking about Dad all the time that I will forget what he looked like, the sound of his voice, the way he smelled. My tears are falling but don't know where to go. I have been my Daddies little girl all my life, I feel so lonely. I can't pick up the phone to hear his voice on the other end and it just kills me. I miss him so much.

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