I buried my mother today.
My mother was 81 years old...she suffered a severe stroke on Friday night March 5th...Daddy found her in the floor on Saturday morning...he had not heard her when she fell.
When we got to the hospital after getting the call, she was awake, and seemed to be conscious...but she could not speak. We later learned that it was a left-brain stroke, the symptoms of which I won't go into for the time being. Later that day (Saturday 3/6/10), she drifted into a coma, and never regained consciousness.
She died on Wednesday morning, 3/17/10, at 6am.
I feel as though part of me died with her. I haven't been able to stop crying.
Here's the kicker: I am a Christian, and a Southern Baptist Pastor to boot. I have not had to deal with this kind of grief since the death of my only brother at the hands of a drunk driver over 26 years ago. I have always been there to help counsel people in the church through these types of grief, but when it happens to your own family, it almost seems surreal. I keep wishing that all of this was just a bad dream, but I know it's not. It's like everything I ever learned about counseling has gone out the window. Does any of this make sense?
I just needed to vent through my keyboard. If I find someone here, anyone, who understands, this will not be my last visit to this forum. I'm thankful to whomever thought enough of what grieving family members are going through to realize the need of a forum such as this.
May God bless each of you as you deal with your own private, personal grief. No one understands your pain better than you. I understand my pain...I'm just learning how to deal with it, and how to channel my emotions.
More later...prayers to God for all of you,