Sorry but I'm sure the deposit is gone for good. It would be highly unusual for someone to be paying debts right before declaring bankruptcy. Avoiding those payments is the reason for doing it. I lost a computer because it was at the computer store to be repaired when the company went bankrupt. Suddenly I was a creditor. I filed a claim and got a few bucks many years later. An engineering firm owed me a fee and the same thing happened. Because the builder owed you the deposit by defaulting on your deal, you may be able to claim it as a bad debt on your taxes so find the written records of all of your costs and show them to a professional tax preparer but don't delay talking to a lawyer; dont rely on my or anyone else's opinion.. Figure out who will own the property, decide if you want to buy it, and find out who to contact in order to avoid having to do it at auction. This could be an opportunity. If you do buy it make sure the seller protects you from any and all claims against it. You are extremely lucky to have not lost a great deal more money. There will be many people more seriously hurt by the bankruptcy so count your blessings.

Luann - exactly what happened with Hitchcock. Things are only going to get worse in this global recession. Polly - my BIL grew up on Long Island, his family has $$$ (though sis is scared to ask how much they lost last year). I hosted her bridal (and her bridesmaids couldn't help financially) and her baby showers, so don't know what anyone there might have given since her MIL and SIL came to the showers here. I think her MIL had bridal shower there, and remember a baby shower that I didn't travel to, one of her friends went totally over the top with baby clothes (all designer) on a clothesline she kept pulling out of a basket. Her MIL was very nice and even sent me some RL clothes, blanket and a bear for my dd. Much different from here (my kids are 5 years apart, different genders, and much heartache and medical bills in between but my family says only the 1st kid gets a shower, and my cousins with girls won't even give me handmedowns b/c they're saving them for their 3rd, 4th kids). Spitfire - sounds like us - I have an MSEE but quit my job when dd was 1 yr old b/c she needed me (and my supervisor who was promoted while I was on mat. leave told me to choose - not a hard decision!). We have always helped our parents, helped siblings when we could (even went without Xmas gifts one year, asked my parents to send the $ they would have spent on us to DH's db when his teenage son died, we gave them everything we could spare for funeral expenses, plus some of my mom's siblings sent donations). It's harder now that we've got 1 income and DH's company has been in the news about going bankrupt, being bought out - all rumors, but the stock price is crazy and they had layoffs in Nov. B/c of our background (MIL grew up in Great Depression), we've always been frugal - short of houses, cars, and education, we don't borrow for anything and we try to get the lowest interest rate/shortest term possible. We paid cash for the last 2 cars, DH is still driving the oldest of the 3 (1996 model with 175,000 miles) but we felt we needed another 4WD and more reliable so bought Subaru in 2006. I'd love to have a plasma TV (we have a 27" TV now, bought new in 1999 to replace the one he bought in 1989 for the barracks - forgot about that since he took it to college with him, we got rid of my old 1986 wood cabinet TV in 1999 as well). But not high on our list of priorities - let's hope the new converter box works next month! My DB is asking for $ help after a divorce (his ex earns 6 figures, he's unemployed but has to pay her $800/mo in child support) and I just don't know if we can afford to help. Maybe if he could pay it back, but he never does and we've got a big credit card bill due in May (financed building materials, carpet, etc. on HD card 0% for 1 year). We already skipped buying each other presents this Xmas, and didn't spend as much on the rest of the family. Wish I hadn't bought that crystal in October but back then I thought economy had hit bottom - even bought some stock for my IRA and of course now it's just come back to half of what I bought it for. Didn't think that a month later DH's company would be laying off. Sorry, way off topic. I don't want to make anyone feel bad no matter what your circumstances.

Much as I truly appreciate your rant, after growing up the only girl in a family with FIVE brothers and having now been married reasonably successfully for over 30 years and raising four sons of my own, I can tell you that men tend to react much better to facts than they do to rants. Believe me, I do plenty of ranting myself but only to my girlfriends, my sisters-in-law, and my daughters-in-law. NEVER where any of the men can overhear me. You are right that you have to separate the dollars for the kitchen renovation from the dollars for the basement renovation and you have to stand your ground on getting the kitchen renovation you want and need without letting your DH siphon off money to (over) fix-up the basement instead. But you have to do it in a way that will get your DH on your side instead of opposed to you. To do that, it is important that you NEVER speak of the kitchen as "my kitchen" or the basement as "his basement." Both areas of the house belong to you BOTH and he has to get fully invested in that fact. So, always speak of it as "our new kitchen" and "our new basement." If you let him start thinking of it as "her kitchen" and "my basement," then, in his mind the whole thing has become a "her wishes against my wishes" thing. If he gives in to you, he feels he is letting himself be henpecked. If he doesn't then he feels (knows?) he is being a bully. Of course, being a man, it is really hard for him to admit to either feeling. All he knows is, he can't win either way and somehow it is all YOUR fault. Since he can't win either way, he may decide he might just as well have that basement all fixed up to retreat to. LOL! So, before you got started, did you establish a budget for the kitchen renovation? Are you sticking to it? If so, you have a perfect ace in the hole to play. You mentioned that he had an "original budget" but that he is now $5K over that amount. Next time you start to discuss his plans/dreams for that basement space, say something like: "Yes honey, it really would be great if we could afford to do X while renovating the basement. But, doing X will put us $Y over our budget for renovating that portion of the house. Is there some other part of the BASEMENT RENOVATION we could give up in order to do X down there instead? I know we both want to keep our cost for that project under control so we need to stick to our budget and we're already talking about going $5,000 over our original budget for the basement. Are you really comfortable going that much over our original budget? It really scares me. Can we afford to do that?" If he suggests that you can cut something out of the kitchen renovation so as to have more money for the basement renovation, don't get mad - or at least don't let him see that you've gotten mad! Instead calmly say, "I see the kitchen renovation and the basement renovation as two separate projects and we have separate budgets for them. We're on budget on the kitchen renovation so that is not the issue here. The issue is OUR budget for OUR basement renovation. How can we stay within our budget for THAT project? I've got some ideas. Maybe you have some others. Let's talk about those ideas. Maybe there is a way to do this but we have to figure it out." Of course, if you are over budget on the kitchen as well, then you will probably have to have the same talk about how to get the kitchen budget under control as well. Then you have to alter the above to "you're right honey, we're over-budget by $Z on the kitchen too so we need to tackle that problem as well. How about if we start by talking about how we can get the basement renovation budget under control and tomorrow we'll talk about how to get the kitchen renovation under control?" Then be prepared to DO IT. If he thinks you care as much about getting the basement fixed up as he does, then he HAS to reciprocate by showing he cares just as much about getting the kitchen renovated properly as you do. This whole thing has to stop being a fight about which one of you gets what you want and instead become a shared quest to get the things you both want while staying within a budget you can afford. Since he is wanting a kitchenette down there, perhaps you might propose that one way to get the budget for the basement under control might be to reuse the cabinetry and appliances that are coming out of your current kitchen to create the basement kitchenette? Trust me, not even a man can suggest that the stuff in your upstairs kitchen isn't good enough for the basement kitchenette if fixing up the basement is going to mean you can't replace the cabinetry and appliances upstairs! Plus, that means the basement renovation has to run behind the kitchen renovation and once dollars are spent on the kitchen renovation, he CAN'T cribbage them to buy stuff for the basement. Other possible ways to save: Replace French doors with less expensive sliders... or you might be able to find used French doors at a Habitat for Humanity Re-Store for less than new ones would cost. Same thing with toilet, sink, and a shower stall for downstairs bath. And, I know you can get regular exterior doors and windows from the Re-Store. But don't dump every idea on him at once. Just suggest one idea that you think he would go for and give him time to think of other ideas. He'll be much more invested in money-saving ideas that HE thinks up first, so parcel your ideas out slowly just to prime the pump. And finally, if you get any opportunity whatsoever to talk proudly in public about how brilliantly your husband is managing to renovate the basement area so INEXPENSIVELY; do it. He'll then bust a gut trying to think of other ways to save money down there. BTW, while it is true that if you sell, you're much more likely to recoup anything spent on the kitchen renovation than on the basement; it sounds as if he basically wants to create a complete "apartment" in the basement. So don't be too surprised if you let it become about "her kitchen versus my basement" to hear him argue that if you ever needed additional income, it would be possible to rent out the basement apartment but that the kitchen is nothing more than a prettier place for you to cook. Men do think like that. LOL!

I make jewelry and have lots and lots of stones and glass beads and findings. I bought a bunch of the plastic drawer sets on casters at Joanne Fabrics or at other hobby-type shops. I then bought some plywood at Lowes and had them cut it to the right size to make tops for the drawer sets. I took the wood home and sanded the ends smooth and then put on a nice dark stain and several layers of polyurethane. Then I went to Joanne's and chose a beautiful fabric that matched the family room. I really hate sewing hems, so I used Tacky Glue and folded back the heavy fabric and glued the hems and side seams. I made skirts for the drawer sets, stapling them to the plywood tops. You can then glue ric-rack or rope trim to hide the staples. I made the fabric into a flap in front of the drawers, but mostly just made straight, heavy skirts that were stapled to the tops. Then the top just sits on top of the drawer set. I sat plants on one, family pictures on another. Using this idea, you can hide all kinds of small things. They make the drawer sets in tall, narrow sizes, as well, so you might be able to find a space in the corner of a guest room or den to put one.