How about hot spiced drinks? Mulled wine. Hot apple cider. Either with or without booze. I suggest apple schnapps for cider or wine. Lemon infused vodka or rum can go well too. Hot Toddies made with bourbon, are great for fall or holidays. Hot Buttered Rum crosses seasons too. Make all of these from scratch. It's easy. Mixes are crap. If some of your guests do not care for hot drinks how about making traditional a Old Fashion. Make from scratch. Use a cinnamon stick for a stir stick and float and orange slice for garnish. Another cold drink for fall is the Moscow Mule (Vodka and Ginger Beer plus lime). I would offer guests drinks that they just can't get at the average bar. Something that will get them to take notice and remember, but something that isn't too wacky and seems soothing and homey. Although more of a winter holiday drink, I think you could do hot chocolate with peppermint schnapps. Or with Irish Cream. Is this just a cocktail party with nibbles or is there going to be a meal? You have to match your menu to the spicy sweeter drinks. If you limit your drink menu to drinks the guests have not tried before, guests tend to drink less. Not that they don't enjoy them, but they tend to savor them rather than guzzle. It saves money and you don't have to worry about "Bill" or "Bob" knocking back fifteen gin and tonics, or whatever 'their' drink is.

Get a caterer! That is a LOT of people to cook for. You can do a few things yourself and ask the caterer to serve if you ask nicely. If a caterer isn't in the budget, at least order prepared food or platters to serve. Cooking for 80 at a hall is just too much. Hard to say what kind of food. I would pick what your mom loves best -- keeping in mind what your guests will enjoy, too. If she's a baseball fan, for example, have hot dogs and peanuts and beer. If she loves travel, have exotic choices. But I think really your best bet is to give the caterer a budget and let him/her suggest things. That always works for me. For decorations, flowers always say "special occasion," but they can be expensive. You can make copies of photos of her at different stages of life and put them in inexpensive lucite frames of different sizes (you may even be able to ask the store if you can return them if you keep them in perfect shape) and put a few on each table for centerpieces, perhaps with a single flower or candle. We did that for my mother's 70th and it worked nicely. Potted flowering plants with a ribbon around the pot are also nice and inexpensive centerpieces (and a lot less work). You can give them as thank you gifts to people who help you with the party. You are so nice to do this for your mother! Good for you. I am sure she will be thrilled.

gellchom - Thanks for the reply. The indoor party was borne of so many years of late summer parties that have been much too hot for the comfort of guests who are a bit older. I love to cook and will probably do some of my best appetizer recipes with additions by professional catering. I guess I am most interested in what would have been served back in 1958 as a place to start. If I don't get much in that regard, I will proceed with my own recipes. Unfortunately, I am a control freak about food and usually give the caterer recipes I want done, but don't have time to do myself. I always enlist help with serving, re-filling bowls, freshening drinks, etc when I host parties. I want the party to have a casual elegance. I like the catering/service people to be a bit "invisible". Even my annual 4th of July party is so much easier with a couple of extra hands. I think it is money well spent as it takes alot of the stress away and enables me to mingle and enjoy the party so to say. I am definitely utilizing help in that regard. I am looking for some unusual or time-reflective recipes that were served in 1958. My parents had a modest wedding by today's standards. Their receiption has been described as something like a beef and beer to me. LOL While they had a modest wedding, they had attendants, etc. The receptions back in the day seem to have been less elaborate than those of in the past couple of generations. The lollipop lamb chops are a great idea as they really can be handled as an appetizer. Besides my dad loves lamb. I love your ideas. I am going to look into some music options. I am a bit limited space-wise for a quartet, so a single flute player would be lovely in the background. I had planned using fresh flowers for decorating and for my parents. I did a 25th and 40th anniversary party for them, dry runs for the 50th! Sangria is a great idea. I have many summer and winter sangria recipes, so I will dig those out. I am thinking a champagne toast before I serve cake. I am a bit stuck as to the signature drink. Don't want something martini-like as a majority of my parents friends take medicines for cholesterol and the like, so I am not sure how well hard alcohol mixes with different meds. I also worry about guests driving. With lite fare, appetizers and desserts, I don't think strong drinks would be a good idea. I was thinking maybe weak whiskey sours? The invite including a request for a memory or anecdote is another great idea. I planned on copying my parents' wedding album photos for display on the buffet and throughout the rooms in my home where the party will take place. Perhaps I can go through all my photos and incorporate them into the album and insert the contributions of the guests. I gave DH a surprise 40th b-day dinner party years ago, and the pics I had copied and enlarged for display were a huge hit. They were displayed in a subtle fashion - on the buffet, in the enclosed porch where the bar was set up, you get the idea. DH b-day party was an intimate dinner party with 10 couples and about 15 family members. DH hates attention so the surprise dinner party was just perfect and was hosted at the home of our closest friends. The party atmosphere was understated and lovely. It was more about great food (we all belong to a gourmet club so we served my husband's favorite meal). I didn't want to go over the top with peripheral decorating as my friends' home is beautifully decorated. I spent a majority of my budget on great food. I guess that is the "feel" I am going for with this party as well. A special album for keepsake would be wonderful. I will have to enlist the services of my SIL who is a big scrap-booker. She, I'm sure will have some ideas! I will also need to chose a unusual invitation. Once again, thanks for getting my brain functioning. I know it is a year away, but I like to have things planned to the T. A total list maker am I! Thank you again.

I've been pondering this because I don't have boys and know much about them. But I do know that ten is about the age that boy scouts start teaching knife safety. Local woodworking/whittling groups often provide the training and labor (one on one) to teach whittling. The gift at the end of the party are small pocket knives (I've seen cheap ones at the dollar store and nice ones for a dollar at flea markets/antique stores). The bags could include small pieces of throwaway wood or branches for them to whittle. You could get some safety/whittling information off the internet. If you do it yourself, try to have one adult per child or have some kids watch while others do. Start by making paper knives and teaching how to open safely. They could practice cutting food by preparing their lunch (carrot sticks, etc..) as well. Give the knife to the PARENT at the end of the party and ask them to keep the knives and use them WITH their child. The gift bag could be a hobo bag (bandanna on a stick). The bandanna could be made out of leftover fabric or an old dress. You could make a fire and let them cook out. Not many kids get to go camping or learn camping skills so it would be met with excitement.