Yes, I felt like a little something was missing--not because I missed building but because I just wasn't as psyched as I thought I would be. This was weird because everything turned out great.

I've found that it has taken me about 5 months to get the kinks worked out, get a gauge on utilities, get organized, get a yard started, get things the way I like them, get finances settled, etc. to really hit my stride. I find that I am just now starting to really enjoy it.

As far as the dings--nothing you can do about it. It's just like getting a new car. You built it to live in it. Just clean as you go, fix the dings as you go and move on.

We're just starting our build - so I can relate to the frenzy and not yet to the let-down. But I know this let-down feeling is similar to what happens to some Entrepreneurs who start businesses - they love the start-up challenge, but then once that's complete, they miss the excitement of the creating - so they sell the business and start on a new one. I guess you'll just have to (dare i even say it :-) start another build.

I have to say I may complain about all the things going on but I know deep down inside I like the challenge of it all. I bet I will experience the same thing when I move into the house. It happened when we were traveling with DH the last couple of years. I always said I hated driving from this placed to that, living in hotels/corporate housing, friends and family would tell me what an exciting life I led..blah blah. I thought they were nuts. Last spring when settled into a rent house I was in a funk for weeks. I missed all the action, going somewhere new each weekend. So, yep I can see what you are talking about!

I know the first ding I see I will faint! LOL! I'm sure it will pass soon once you move onto another project :-)

I am a ways off from moving in, but since I am sort of a "project driven" person, I have dozens of projects wating for the house to get done first. Once I move in, I can start on something new to keep me occupied. Actually, once I move in, the house still isn't done. After I am in, I'll finish the master suite and then the sun room. then I am building a 5 acre pond out back.

We're still about a month away from moving in (I feel like I've said that for two months now), but I certainly anticipate what you describe. I'm sort of experiencing it now because I've picked everything out, made all decisions, and it is taking them absolutely forever to install everything.
All of our belongings have been in storage for a year now (lived in a hotel for seven months and been house-sitting for five months), so I know I'll love just putting my hands on our stuff again. Some time will be occupied with just moving in and enjoying the possessions that have been out of reach for so long.
Then, I certainly anticipate that "so what do I plan for now" feeling. As you said, the same feeling that followed the wedding. I hope to remedy it, though, by baby-making soon after the move-in! You mention already having kids, so that might not be the best solution for you!!!!

Two years to the month since we moved in...you see me coming back here to get my "building fix" from time to time! Yes, I miss the project. I don't want to build another house for myself, but I sure would like to build a spec house to sell. However, I won't -- the market's just not right. I've thought about working for a local builder to help their customers define and visualize their house plans -- call me crazy! I've even talked to a few builders and realtors about the need for a book about it!

In the meantime, I try to busy my retired self with other creative projects like writing in my blogs about travel, building, gardening, etc. :-)

Cameron

Been in over a year. We're still finishing the basement (final inspections within 2 weeks) and have yet to paint 60% of the main floor. After this is done, there's still the back deck and drywalling the garage. Then, there's working on the dairy barn, and, well, there's so much still to do I look forward to the day I can feel a let down.

Shooter, that makes sense. It does take a while to really get a feel for a new house.

whistlepigger (funny name) Yes, I think that's it. The whole build process was new and exciting and challenging for me. Now that I'm in decorating mode, it's more relaxed and not the same sense of urgency.

kelntx, I saw on your other thread that hubby is not going to be around for a while. That's certainly a challenge. You'll be glad when the dust settles back down. I hope the time goes quickly during your build.

ccoombs, yes many projects need to be done here but it's still not the same as building. In fact, I'm procrastinating on them as we speak! LOL

soonermagic...ohhh...good luck on the baby making! How exciting! Nope, we're done here. It took me too many years to have the ones I got (2 girls, 15 months apart) and I'm too old to start over! LOL! Both kids are in school all day now so that may be contributing to my let down. I still have volunteer time at school and my many projects at home to keep me busy...but again, not quite the same as building.

wonbyherwits, what a great idea for a book. I do enjoy helping others when I can with the building process too. That's why I probably won't be going away from these boards for a long time! Glad to see I'm not alone.

bungeeii, busy, busy, busy! LOL! HOpe you get some down time soon!

Lindy

lindybarts,

I can relate too. I LOVE my house-- even if we're having problems getting GC to finish the "finish work".
But there's still something missing .!.??.!.

We moved in one month ago. And, for the most part I brought very little of my former home with me. So, I sit here typing on one of my new livingroom end tables (now in my kitchen) because I gave my old desk away. I'm looking at the new copper dining table we just bought this weekend but there's no chairs (the one's that came with it looked funky). What I'm getting at is I LOVE this place but right now I still feel like I'm in a hotel with someone else's new furniture. My SIL said...I now need to claim it and make it a my HOME. That comes with getting use to it, organizing and outfitting it the way I want. And that's going to take little time. What's really funny about that is I always feel at home when I'm outside on our new back porch. It just feels so right!

Lindy,
I think some letdown is normal, all that dreaming, planning and build-up and then the reality sets in. Perhaps if you were to post MANY pictures for us to oooh and ahhh over...it would help. :) LOL!
I am feeling 'lack of excitement' myself, our house is sold, we have no where to live (except right next door-not my first choice) and our plans are not done and... well, you get the idea. So if you would feel better focusing on someone else's issues-I've got plenty, stay tuned! ;)

Lindybarts, how timely. We moved in the first of February and were utterly exhausted. It took us nine months and we GCd our home while both of us worked full time jobs. We had no building experience at all, but were blessed with wonderful subs, and it all turned out just fine. I handled about 85% of the project; scheduling, financial, inspections, etc. Every weekend and many nights after work were spent running to town purchasing/ordering items for the next subs coming in.

After the first month, I started feeling restless and quite bored. I have no decorating sense (nor tons of money to do so) so that part of the house is just lost on me. It doesn't quite feel like home yet. I too feel like I'm living in someone else's house. I finally got the nerve up to talk to my doctor and was put on anti-depressants for a few months. Other things have played into some of the emotions that I'm feeling, such as not letting go of a daughter who went off to college during the build (it was such a good distraction to not have to deal with those emotions) but am feeling them as she gets ready to go away again this year. Oh the joys of being human! Plus, the Oregon rain will soon arrive and that's just no fun at times.

Lindy-
I had to laugh when I read your post. Last week our builder told us that he felt like we'd be in our house by the first of November-Yikes!! I'm not ready yet! Well, I thought I was until he said that-LOL! Anyway, back on subject, I have a tendency to go overboard with whatever project-o-the moment(anyone else recognize themselves here?) and am completely let down when it's over!
Dont't worry, life will soon return to normal and you will probably find yourself buried in some other over your head project to take it's place. I always think "when I get through with this.....then I'll be able to relax and ENJOY life!!LOL Will we ever learn??
Best of luck to you, and happy relaxing!
Sandy

Lindy,

Congrats on getting all moved into your new home! I had to laugh at your post. You know all is back to normal when the cats start to throw up on your brand new carpet and the kids spill milk or pop on it, or your (my) husband spills a full cup of coffee onto it.

Now that those initiation rites are done, you can relax and enjoy your new home. :)

I too went through a period of "let down" or depression after we finished our home. The whole process is so intense and creative than it is back to the reality of everyday mundane life. I think many people thrive on a certain level of stress and homebuilding definitely provides for that. I also enjoyed the constant interaction with the people as my daily life is pretty quiet being at home with my kids most days.

It has taken 6 months but things are definitely feeling more "normal" now. I am finally to the point where I can say I love my house and just am content with the knowledge that I will have exciting projects in the future to work on.

Cah3036 Â I know what you mean about decorating. I think I could boost my spirits about the house quite a bit if I knew how to decorate it and had a lot of fun money to play with - which I definitely donÂt :). In six months we have only hung one picture on the wall and that was our wedding picture! I am at a loss as to what to do with the rest. Maybe I need to start hanging out in the decorating forum instead of the home building one.

Good luck and know that it will get easier with time. Getting out and laughing with friends and hubby help a lot too. Start other projects as time/money allows. Things will get dinged up, scratched, and stained and know that each one gets a little easier. I was determined from the start not to let that stuff get to me as we built this house to raise our kids in  not as a showroom.

That reminds me  I have a friend who is actually going to sell her home that they built almost two years ago because her husband is so stressed out by living in a new place. She said he constantly yells at her and their four kids for messing the place up and doing anything that might "damage" the house. He wasnÂt like that in their previous home. His obsession with keeping the place perfect is driving them out and back into an older, cheaper place where she hopes he can relax. WeÂll seeÂ

Lindy--yes I can relate. We've been in a month and I can't say I want to build again (right now)but there are so many things that need to be done and the money is not there. I am not patient and I'm going to have to learn to be. Furniture, landscaping, decorating, etc. It never ends.

I say bring on the boredom! This has been so stressful that I can't even imagine not being grateful beyond belief to have my life back. I can understand feeling a lack of focus or a diminished sense of purpose; however, I think that channeling those energies into something else is possible. I enjoy the idea of having the luxury of free time that I can choose to spend however I want, rather than being forced into making quick decisions or serving as an impromptu project manager b/c my GC is incapable of overseeing his subs competently. So, since I am also goal-oriented, my goal following house completion is to experiment in the kitchen with my new Wolf DF range and develop lots of yummy gluten-free foods!

cah...don't mention the rain...shhhhh! I know it's just around the corner but I'm trying to pretend I don't know that! LOL

Dixie..Oh yes, the Wolf range. That would be the one that I need to learn how to cook on. LOL! When you develop those recipes, send 'em on over!! I saw Kats talking about burning food on her new range, maybe she and I can form a support group! LOL

Thanks to all who responded.

Lindy--I'll be there soon! I have to laugh because I can see myself feeling the same way. At least after the holidays, anyways. I'm sure that will keep me busy for at least a couple of weeks.

Ah, the rain...grew up there and am all too familiar with it. Never thought it was THAT bad until I moved away. It seems to be rainy every time I go back to visit my parents!

Ditto on the burnt food support group! I have a feeling I'm going to blacken everything until I figure out our Bluestar. Hmmmm...that gives me maybe three weeks from move-in before the whole family comes for Thanksgiving. This could be interesting!

Lindy, I can see that happening. It is such a huge project, and takes so much of your time and energy. But I have to say, right now I agree with Dixiedoodle. I cannot wait to be bored!!

We list the house we currently have tomorrow. I still have so much to do. Maybe if I don't sleep....Well, I'm off to bury my statue of St. Joseph....:-)

Amy

Maybe I haven't been in long enough yet (a week today!), but I'm still too happy to be in to feel let down. Of course, I've had folks in and out all week finishing and fixing little things, but I've got to admit that I haven't physically left the house since I got my last load in. I just love being in here so much. And that doesn't even touch on how much time I've spent watching the ocean during the day and the stars at night.

I can't wait for whale watching season!
Summer

Hi guys. It has been six weeks or so and I have got to say, no, no let down. Not one tiny bit. We have been landscaping and decorating and this and that but this place fits perfectly. Maybe even like that perfect pair of jeans that makes your butt look great. :)

We have not sold the other house yet which is a bummer but it doesn't diminish the great feeling of being here one bit.

I think a lot depends on your expectations. A new house doesn't 'fix' life, any more than a new toy did when we were children. On some level, we still expect it will, even though we know better.

I've been super excited for the last week because real, visible progress is being made. I can't quite beleive all this is mine, that it's all real. If I'm still in that mode when I move in, I know I'll have a major crash latter simply because its how our brains work. Endorphin production drops at some point, and our ability to utilize them also becomes exhausted for a time. So some degree of 'new house blues' is not just natural, its inevitable.

And then there's the whole adreniline addiction thing: the more stressful the build, the more adreniline we produce, and our bodies come to crave it. Excess adreniline has some pretty nasty effects on our systems, including heart damage, and it takes a while to reset our baselines when the level drops.

Get some exercise! Helps burn off the toxic stew of stress during the build, and keeps us on an even keel after the move in. I don't think I could survive this process if I weren't biking 100 to 200 miles a week.

oruboris, I think you nailed it. It must have been the adreneline rushes. Luckily, the move coincided with my kids starting school and I have been trying to get to the gym a few days/week and it has been helping. I can already feel myself getting back to a real routine. 100-200 miles/week....Wow!

Summer, just peeked at your new house on the build update thread! I'm so happy for you! What a gorgeous home and property. Enjoy living in your paradise...when can we all come over?

Hey fishpants...can't wait for yours to be done!

Hi Lindy, thanks! I do have an extra bedroom, you know. :)

Say, are you still thinking about building on Maui?