Linda...beautiful. Those memories are what keeps you going. I have a similar one from about 4 years ago taped up in my bathroom....a reminder when I was feeling frustrated....My mother died two years ago this month....but it is still there. Thanx for posting it...Shalom. Derry

My husband who had AZ had a brain scan and the result was part of his brain had atrophied. It could never get better, that part of his brain was dead. Nothing helps Alzheimer patients. The meds they give them are all experimental, never been proven to help.

My MIL had it. In our family my FIL hid it from the family. Suddenly he was making arrangements for visits etc. He never reached out to the family about what he was seeing. And then...he died very sudddenly. And my husband's oldest sibling, the only daughter went into denial as we all began to see the signs. She was adamant that mom was grieving. Finally, after years went by, a dx was made--well as much as can be when the patient is alive. (Not sure about now, but then a true dx could only be made after death during an autopsy). As the disease progressed there was a period of time when she "knew" something wasn't right, and it made her very anxious. We would find her looking through her purse, and she had no idea why, but it was a frantic moment for her. There were times when she was insistent that someone call her a taxi so she could get to the train and get to the beach--"It's summer, I need to get there"... Then there is a point when a sort of peace comes. The anxiety was finally gone, and she was always in a good mood. Not all patients enter into that "good mood". But everyone loved her at the "lockup" as we all fondly called her assisted living facility. They had a code that needed to be entered to be able to leave through the door. Worked well, the patients with memory issues...well, they couldn't remember the code so they stayed put. She loved listening to music. She loved the singing. She didn't participate, no eye contact towards the end. I would suggest you find a place where maybe she can "participate" in some sort of activities for people with memory issues. (Even if participating means watching) I am not sure if things like this are for residents of these types of places only or if you can get her into something like that as an outpatient. Pictures of grandchildren and family members are very important. Make them BIG so she can see them. Casually mention the names of the people in the picture as you point at them. You never know when she will have a clear moment. And you just never know if she does remember someone but can't put the words together. Here's a happy story....One day she whispered to my husband's brother who was visiting her--"this is such a nice hotel. And they never make me pay". She was whispering it because she thought if they heard her they might charge. Little did she know, she was paying. But things like that still make us smile. I wish you the best. It is a difficult thing to watch. Stay supportive of your friend's husband. Perhaps he needs some professional help too. Someone who can help him understand what is going on. You are a good friend. She can't tell you that. But it is true. hugs bee PS--just thought of this--if she can remember specific stories from her younger days, get them on tape. video is best. Audio will do. Some day, the stories get shorter, and finally they go away completely.

You say your FIL and MIL are living alone? with just daytime help? Not good. Especially if she's starting to have physical problems. Let me just tell you a couple of stories--not to terrify you, but to open your eyes. An older couple my husband knew were living alone like that. One day he visited, and found the woman totally black and blue--all bruised up from head to toe. She'd promised to keep her husband home--then one night, she woke in the middle of the night, to find her husband battering her with something heavy (I forget what)--he thought she was an intruder--she was badly injured and, of course, had to put him in a home at that point. It's not unusual for Alzheimer's patients to think their loved ones were strangers (and evil ones at that). Another couple I know--he has Azheimers, and one day she had a major stroke. Thank goodness he was able to call for help--but he didn't do it right away, and she's in really bad shape--will be months in a rehab facility, if not longer. Another Azheimer's couple? The husband was injured. The wife called her daughter's work (thank goodness, again)--because she 'couldn't remember the number for 9-11'. What would MIL do if FIL left the house in the middle of the night? Would she be able to follow him and get him home? What if she had a medical problem? Are you certain he'd be able to get her help? and you really cannot predict how the disease will progress. He could be one person today, and someone totally different tomorrow. Please, don't allow your parents to be alone at this point in time. If you can't convince them to move to an assisted living facility, then you need to start having younger family members stay with them. Or another alternative that might work well for you--how about hiring one of the ladies (usually from one of the islands) to come in and live with them. You can go through an agency, so that they're checked out, they're very reasonable. Usually they can stay for about 6 months on their work visa, then they often have a friend or relative who can come and take over until they're eligible to return.