Don't tell her you are going to stop bringing her cigarettes, just do it. When she starts to complain, don't argue, just tell her "next time". There is a good chance that when "next time" comes, she won't even remember what you said. There will always be a next time.

Can she have candy? If so, hand it to her with a smile and hope for the best. Her favorite magazine?? Just so you can hand her something when you need to.

Tell the NH that you will cooperate in seeing that she doesn't get cigarettes.

The chance of fire in a nursing home is something that good ones simply will not take. If she gets too hard to handle, I am sure she will get medicated until the addiction gets easier to work with.

Good luck! It might take a while, but she will settle down to it.

If she has to go to a hospital for any reason then it's their responsibility to find one that will take her. My husband was a roamer and had trouble at the first home he went to. The only way they could get rid of him after accepting him was to place him in the hospital, then they did not have to accept him back. The hospital called other homes who sent someone to evaluate him and seeing the restraints no one wanted him. I asked the social worker what they were going to do, they said he just stays in the hospital. You might tell her doctor about the problem, he may be able to admit her for an evaluation, then they may place her.

Just wanted to put in my two cents' worth... The nursing home near me takes smokers, but there's only one other smoker. They told us up front that they cannot take Mom outdoors to smoke every time she asks. They intend to get her outdoors a couple times in the morn and a couple times in the aft. She's been there since August and is now down to 2-4 ciggies a day. I find her sitting out at the nurses' station waiting to find a willing nurse/aid/helping hand to take her out. My husband calls it fishing...They tell her they don't have time, but maybe in a little while... There's also a gal that can maneuver her wheelchair over by the window where they hand out the dinners...I hear her begging Coffee!!! Coffee!!!! She's fishing too.
There are aids to fill this need to get out and smoke, but they are busy girls, so I understand that Mom has to wait even tho she doesn't like to. I see that she isn't quite as desperate...doesn't get quite as upset as she used to. But whenever I go there, she casually mentions that we should go out for a coke...but I know she really means for a smoke... Makes me feel real good about why I am needed!

They keep her cigs and lighter in a desk drawer; they have not allowed her to keep them with her. This just killed her at first but she's used to it now.

Well, we finally found a decent place for MIL, and it wasn't even a NH, it was a nice assisted living with a locked dementia unit. We never even asked about smoking, it was the only place available that could meet her care needs and had an opening.

They say it's a smoke free place, but they have a smoking area out by the loading dock, for staff only, I guess. Oh well. At least MIL has a place to live. I'm not sure how much longer she'll even be able to remember that she smokes.

I'm glad to hear back from you, and that you found a good facility. Check with the staff about putting her on nicotine patches. Smoking is an addiction, both chemical and behavioral, and stopping can be tough. Maybe the patch will help her?

But you've done a good job of taking care of her, and I hope that things continue to work out for you.

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I think when she is admitted she needs a doctor to treat her for the withdrawal from the cigarettes. When my sis was in the hospital they treated her for it. Care home usually have doctors that come in to see the patients rather than being taken to see one.

problem is there is pretty good science that denying nicotine to person with a psychological disorder is a death sentence-you are obviously not a scientist or science student

Fraelaine, this is a thread from 6 years ago. And your comment isn't relevant - you need to tell it to the nursing homes that are not permitting smoking for safety reasons.

I think people who come along and make absurd comments like this are called Trolls. ???

Have you ever considered those electronic cigarettes? I believe they call it vaping. It will satisfy her craving for nicotine and I would think something like that will be allowed as it produces no cigarette smoke.

Hello my name is Christy Farrow and I'm going through almost the same thing with my husband.

"Discharged" ( I that He was thrown out .) ONE yesterday.

So know I'm looking for another