Lots of good responses, thanks! aka_peggy: I will be doing most of the work myself, with other friends adding a bit of labor. Thanks for the plant ideas and the link to natives. I am big on natives, so will definitely use this! annabert: I'll send her to Thanksgiving Farms--do they have nice designs going all year 'round? Could she go in January? GardenGranma: Wow, so many shows and tours! If I could only choose 3 or 4 to attend (I have to fly up there and all, LOL), which would you recommend? creatrix: The CM will be any variety that gets about 10" high or so. Down here, we have a variety called Natchez that I love, but I'm not sure it is available in your area. The bed at the house is about 6' deep and, yes, I plan to put in a hedge row and then a smaller variety in front of that. I need to take a closer look at this though, once I have the measurements. The curves are supposed to be gentle and flowing, not scalloped. I guess my picture appears a bit busy, LOL, but that isn't my intention. Brent_in_NoVa: Thanks for reminding me about foot traffic. I think I will add a stone 'landing' so that people walking up the drive won't be crammed between a parked car and the bed. My parents have the same type of walk/drive and it is a pain for this very reason. For the retaining wall, I think this is probably as high as it will go. She really doesn't want it at all, but I think it is necessary for erosion control. Other homes have the same slope and very few have walls. One the right side of the property, I would like to pull the neighbor's yard into hers, hence the river birch. There is more room than it appears, and I wanted something that would get pretty dense. She has probably 15' of that part of the land, but I will need to measure again. I will be posting a 'real' landscape design once I have the measurements. I think this will help me (us!) to gain some perspective. Thanks again, keep your thoughts coming! Chris

I have some ideas that help me keep in touch with kids that were close to my little girl. Always take alot of pictures when together. Take professional & alot yourself. Those will be fun memories for her to look at. Make scrapbooks of your family & send her some fun scrapbooking material like stickers, stamps, fun scissors, & paper. I have my boys hold up signs & take pictures. Can you & DH hold up an "I love you" sign & mail to her? Do you have a webcam? Sometimes Webcams can be fun. Do you know her interests? Some girls love to receive flowers at school. I just sent one girl flowers(favorite color) & balloons. I think it makes them feel special. Find out if her school has a memory book. Parents can write a poem for their kids. Does she have email or myspace? Does she like Neopets or anything like that. You can get her an account & you both get pets & take care of them. Find something of interest for the both of you & mention it to her. That might give you something to talk about on the phone. Try emailing first & finding her interests. Oh yeah...kids love things that are in & Hannah Montana is in for little girls. How about a pillowcase with Dads picture on it, & an "I Love You". A Build a Bear with a special message you both have recorded. Also, if you ever get the opportunity, say real nice things about the BM. Even if you can't stand her. Think of anything positive to say, and say it. "Oh your mom is pretty & you got her...hair, eyes etc. If I were you, I would try real hard to help the relationship DH has with her. I think that was my job as the SM & my obligation as the BM to do that for my children. I think many moms are very special and talented that way(some aren't). I feel for you being long distance & for her. It's a tough situation to be in & it's not fair to the little girl, BM, you, or BF. I think the custodial parent has alot of influence in those situations. If she's not selfish she will nurture a good relationship between her little girl & you & Dad. If she's selfish & doesn't like you, good luck...as the little girl will probably not like you either. My little girl was young so I definetly influenced the relationship the best I could. I gave my daughter $50.00 of the child support each month saying it was from her Dad & she could spend it on herself, donate, or relatives. We chose Dad cards on holidays. Called several times during week(slow times). She had his picture hanging up in the bedroom which I framed. I really believe in the long distance situation the custodial parent can make it work or break it & the noncustodial deals with the outcome of the circumstances.

Cpartist good advice!! Btw- what did you think of PPFs idea about changing the elevation to extend the high ceilings and window through to the kitchen? It would allow a bit more natural light in, yes? I currently have a similar layout as far as not having a direct window in my kitchen, but having them in the adjacent dining room and living room in an open concept space.... it doesn’t ever feel dark to me now, so it never even occurred to me that it may be an issue. I don’t know what the cost will be to extend the high ceiling and windows but am going to explore it on Monday.

Jeet Jeet- Before you sign on all these add ons, please hire an experienced interior designer that is not affiliated in any way with this builder, to ask about all this. And you want someone who has common sense who will tell you what is a waste of money. Someone who will say to you, how will you change the light bulbs on the top of those cabinets? And what do you need lights there for anyway? There is glass in the top, you can see in them why do you need the lights, the room is lit. And you don't need the glass cabinets either, all the cabinets will have to be totally perfectly neat all the time. Who needs that? And it limits what you can put in them because they have to be perfectly neat. Ask how much the undercabinet lighting is. I'll bet you money that you can get a far less expensive stick-on lighting system at Home Depot or Lowes. A 50 " deep island is too deep. You can't reach across it to clean it, you will have to walk around which is a waste of time and energy. Unless you are 6 feet tall. Very important- don't spend too much money over-improving. You will never make it back when you sell. Your house will only sell for the average house value in that development which you can be sure, was not over-improved. I do suggest finding out if you can soundproof your guest bedroom on the first floor, else there will be problems with your elderly parents. Don't ask the builder to install the grab bars, but do have the builder reinforce behind and beside the guest toilet and in the shower. It may be much cheaper for you to purchase grab bars and hire someone to install the grab bars if and when they are needed. You can ask what the builder would charge to install the grab bars. It may be worth the cost for the builder to just go ahead and do the whole thing for you. See, this is way more important to me than fancy glass-fronted cabinets. And did you choose slip resistant tile for the bathroom?