Maybe he's too hoidy toidy for us now :-D

And what of Kent?

I was just thinking about Steven the other day. Surely, he hasn't given up gardening. Just too busy? I hope that's all it is.

Cameron

Yes, I also hope he is too busy, but, then you know, these newly married couples - so little time!! lol. Kent posted a week or two ago, but hey, no Mr. Morton!! The estrogen ratio is way too high!!! Token and TM, not to mention Frogview, are stressed!!!!

Nancy.

Oh yeah, where is Mr. Morton? I loved his gardens.

LOL midnightsmum. I decide to start a blog as not to bore all you nice people.

http://thegaudygarden.blogspot.com/

Frogview

I sent Steven a mail on the address I had from him and it came back. So can't reach him on that side either. Now I'm really worried...

Eduarda

maybe this will be easier if interested. Sorry to hijack.
My blog is here

Eduarda, was that an email or snail mail? I think I might still have his snail mail somewhere from the Christmas Card exchange.

Annette

Annette, it was email. I don't have his snail mail, as I didn't participate in the Christmas card exchange. Mr.Morton has been absent for a long time too. I sure hope they are ok.

Eduarda

I agree, I've been thinking about them both and wondering what is up?

We'd love to hear from you, Steven (and other absent C.G.ers as well)!

Patti (who is worried too . . .)

Hello Everyone!

First of all, thanks to beautiful Edna for sending me an e-mail alerting me to this thread. And thanks to Annette for starting it (big smooch). I feel like a real ass not checking in with all of you much sooner. To be frank, I had to set my garden on the back burner to tend to things that cropped up in my life. And honestly, I was a bit embarrassed by the condition of my garden.

By short way of explanation for my absence, many of you may remember that I started to get politically active last summer. Well that really revved up for me in November after Prop 8 passed. For months, I had to push many things out of my field of vision to focus my time and energy. My involvement really just ended with the court's decision last month. I'm still married, but it has come at a price. Brian and I are very happy and very sad at the same time.

Also I've been spending a lot of time with my best friend who has been terminally ill since early March. The time I would have normally spent in the garden has been spent at hospitals. I could only shrug at the weeds and do what I needed to do.

We did accomplishes one major goal. We finally got the landscaping finished on the slope between the sidewalk and the picket fence. We put in Eden roses along the fence. Below that we've planted a sweep of Spanish lavender. The next layer is mass plantings of osteospermum arctic white. To anchor the plantings, we put Joyce Coulter ceanothus on the far ends. Finally, trailing rosemary was planted to spill over the retaining wall. I think we reached a good solution to the slope problem. Everything is on drip lines and will be very drought tolerant once they all establish.

This thread couldn't have come at a better time. I've always been inspired by all of you. I'm being furloughed for two days a month starting in July. A sign of the times for California. It's only two days a month, but for me, it's not such a bad thing. That's some substantial time and I could use it to balance my life. Even though it's coming on deep summer, there's still a lot of things I can do. I'm soooooooo ready to get back to my garden.

I hope you forgive me for being away for so long. I was touched that several people were worried. I would have to spend days reading back through threads. If anyone wants to catch me up on major events that have taken place that I've missed, I would be appreciative.

Again, many thanks! I hope all of your gardens are happy and healthy!

Steven

Wow! It's great to hear from you again. The plantings sound wonderful. Johnny and I have been thinking of you. I was holding a co-worker's baby at a cookout recently (he cried when my boss held him and fell asleep when I took him, bless his heart) and his mother asked us when we were going to adopt. Monetary reasons aside, I can't even imagine the nightmare of legal paperwork it would take, especially since we aren't a couple in the eyes of the law. I'll enjoy J's horde of great-nephews and -nieces for now.

I'm terribly sorry for your friend and for you. Glad that you and Brian are well, though. I hope you enjoy the down time.

kent

Steven, glad there was nothing seriously wrong except, of course, your sick friend. Sometimes we have to make a choice to do what is most important....I think you chose wisely.

Hope the two days helps things smooth out a bit and you can begin gardening more again.

Best wishes,

glenda

Stephen, I have lurked for many years and remember your beautiful garden photos. Jesse and I have been together 21 years and at the passing of prop 8 I refuse to go to weddings and buy a gift ever again! It infuriates me. When I retire..soon, we will return to my home in Wilton Manors Fla which has the largest blue collar gay population on the east coast. I just want to be among my own. I find that instead of just being a Republican or Democrat or Independent is not enough; you must be a Radical to bring change. During the womens movement in the 70's I can remember a speech where someone said, "In order to reach the moon, you must shoot for the stars." However, the compromise of "civil union" is not enough and gives another "label" that says "to the back of the bus"!!!!

Kent, when we were younger the only babies available for us to adopt (foster) were AIDs babies. I could not do it. I just couldn't see something die. Now, If I were at a parenting age, I would sign papers until next decade in order to adopt. AND, as far as finances are concerned, there is nothing wrong or bad about being poor, love don't cost a thing! Also, think of the mountains of paper work involved for your protection in your later years. It is endless.

Jim (who would be the parent in the soccer field fights)lol

Steven, thanks for checking in and letting us know what has been happening in your life. It sounds like you have had a plateful and a half, with zero time for recreation.

My sympathies to your friend, and to you. Hospital visits are so hard, and hospital stays are, of course, even more horrible.

We have definitely missed your breezy and witty comments around here.

And speaking of witty -- Kent -- I'm glad to see that you are still with us. It's good to hear from you, no matter how briefly.

ThinMan

Wonderful to hear from you. I lost your e-address in a pc crash. Otherwise I would have contacted you to check on you.

I am sorry your friend is so ill. I have been there.

Hugs to you both,

Kathy

What a wonderful way to greet the morning, Steven you don't know how glad I was to see your response to this thread, I was really starting to get worried. I was just about to ransack the house to see if I still had your snail mail addy, and that wouldn't be easy as the house is one h*ll of a mess.

Everything is stripped out of two room, piled on top of each other in the dining room with just a narrow walk through. The tile man is coming tomorrow, doing the happy dance here. Looking for your snail mail addy would have been looking for a needle in a haystack.

Steven I'm so sorry about your friend, I've been there too, it's not an easy thing to watch. Life is not fair in so many ways, we just have to deal with what it throws at us the best we can but at the same time keep on fighting for what is right.

Hope you can find some down time just to stop and smell the roses, time waits for no-one. I know you're very busy but please pop in once in awhile, let us know what's happening in your neck of the woods, you really have been missed.

Kent pops in once in awhile or I should say once in a blue moon, that's a hint Kent. There's a few more we'd love to hear from, you know who you are. I don't do blogs :o)

Hugs to both of you,
Annette

Good to hear that Steven is still gardening, just not posting. Good to find Jim's blog and hear from Kent.

We need photos. You know how we all sit and stare and hope for more. We need garden news and advice, too.

Nell

Okay, hijacking for a second:
Jim, I like the blog. As far as adoption goes, what really scared me was that a friend of a friend, etc adopted twins. Johnny's response was "at least that way you'd get it all done at once." What!? My co-workers have been circulating the pic of me holding the baby, since I'm such a people hater. I do find myself eyeing women and thinking things like "she has good hair, I wonder what her family's medical history is." That looks even weirder in print than it sounds in my head. Lordy.

I should clarify what I meant about me and blogs, I should have said I don't leave comments but do enjoy reading them. As I said before I am the No.1 computer klutz.

Slub, so good to see you posting again, how are the girls doing?

Annette

Kent, let me apologize for being so strong. It is just jealousy as we do not have the "option" at our age.
What ever you decide is the right one. No mistakes.

I will not carry this conversation further on this forum. Nuff said.

Jim

Steven, its really wonderful to know you are still here, we do tend to worry when our loved ones don't check in for long periods of time. Please don't be concerned about trying to catch up with all the posts I'll give you the important news...I won 80 million on the lottery and have invited everyone from the cottage to join me on my new ship(you might have heard of her)QE 11 for a a wee get-together.

For the duration of the voyage there will be no illness, no prejudice, no slugs,no aphids, no goatweed, only a few chickens...a girl can dream...right?

Take good care of yourself and your dear friend. Come to us when you can,xo to Brian, Martha

Steven, so happy to hear from you. Happy to hear Brian is doing good as well. I am deeply sorry to hear about your dear friend, that just breaks my heart. Hugs to you both and the puppies too. I will keep your friend in my prayers.

Dear Jim, back in the ol' days it was just as difficult for interracial couples (me and DH) and/or single people to adopt as well. Times have changed. ... times will change again, and again. In my husbands' country he had no rights at all. To speak one would be shot, be shot for any reason. He fled for his life in 1975 with his family. We do live in a great nation - not perfect - but great none-the-less. Please my friend, do not become bitter. Prop 8 will eventually pass.

Steven, it's so great to hear from you! I'm so sorry about your dear friend. Stay strong and don't forget to take care of yourself, too. I was shocked when Prop 8 didn't pass, but please don't let that cloud hang over you. Your garden plans sound great! I remember the thread about the border outside your fence.

Cameron
PS to Jim --sorry to hear that you want to leave the Chapel Hill area.

Danceswithwolves, back in the ol' days being gay, you were given electro shock therapy, or lobotomy for your mental illness.

I am not bitter at all. In the course of history the gay movement has gone leaps and bounds in forty years (1969), which is a "blip" in time compared to others struggles which spanned centuries. However, we live in a faster moving world than that of the 17-1800s, or even the 1950's.

Your comments have all touched me - the desire for a child, the desire to be considered 'equal'. So much has changed since the '60's. I think sometimes we thought we had failed to change the world, but to think of life now, as opposed to then - WOW!!! I have gone back to school (college) in my 50's. I am the oldest student in my class, the youngest being a 19-year-old mother of one. The 30-somethings are the scariest. They appreciate the freedoms they enjoy, but have no idea where they came from, and how easy it would be to lose them. In Canada, we have a Conservative government, who would like to open and foreclose on many of the advances made in the last 40 years.
I listened to a great program on our CBC Radio 1, about the 20 songs that changed the world. One of them, a week or two ago was Gloria Gaynor's I Will Survive. The commentator said that this song launched the disco era, which not only liberated and enabled women, but also gay men. I'd never really thought about this before, but the disco lounges were such liberal, safe places....
OK, I'm off my soap-box.

Nancy.

Hi Steven. Gay Pride Parade's here soon. I'll think of you.
My best wishes to you and Brian.

Libby

Hey guys, nice to hear from you. I have wondered where you were many many times myself...I am glad to hear its just a busy life keeping you away. I miss your friendly posts and non judgmental attitudes. You were always positive and yet still honest in your posts when us gardeners needed it..and yet real..not just sugary sweet, positive and encouraging, but not blind. Great qualities to have...post when you can..share when you have time. We need posts and gardening friends like that here...but most of all, take care of yourself first...after all, in the end, that is what matters most in life. Life gets in the way sometimes but you are missed..your a great assest to the forum and to the delicate balance that exsists here. I personally have missed your presence and influence. Gardeners, even "net gardeners" are real people too..life gets to busy sometimes, and our gardens or beds get weedy and unkept sometimes...that is life in a REal GARDENERS world..I find that makes you more real, more believable and better respected in my book, than constant magazine like pictures that dont show how a real garden lives and functions, pictures that make it hard to live up to for the normal gardener with a life outside his or her garden who does not have that picture perfect garden and the dollars to back it up...gasp...it makes you normal.. :) Post when you can guys.....even short posts...we need you around here..and when your busy with life...we understand that too..but we might still be missing you then thats all...

Oh lots of friends posting here! Good to "see" you all!!!

Hello Steven! Thanks for the update. I can quit inventing dire circumstances for your absence (I thought at the very least you and Brian might have taken the dear doggies and moved to Holland). I'm so sorry about your friend. Seems like they were a damn fine judge of character when they chose a caring, steadfast friend like you.
I hope you'll pencil us into your busy schedule. We'd love to hear from you anytime. Don't wait for the perfect garden.
Kent you always have something sensible to say, even if I have to read it over two or three times to be certain. It's never dull when you're around! I wish you'd pop in more often.

Jim, I enjoyed your Gaudy Gardener blog and photos. Thanks!

And thanks to Annette for the "reunion"!
Patti

I'm glad to see you posting here Steven! I missed you and Kent!!
Steven, I'm very sorry about your friend, but it is such a wonderful thing that you are such a great friend and are there.
There are so many children out there needing wonderful homes and families. In Atlanta I have noticed that many same sex families have children that were typically often not available for them to adopt before, specifically mixed-race and African-American children. I think it is a fantastic thing that someone out there is realizing that these children deserve a loving, stable home and good parents which, to me, is above and beyond race and sexuality.
I hope that if you want to have a family one day, you will be able to, Kent.

I am sorry I missed this thread. I am glad to get caught up on each of you . Steven I am sorry for the sadness in your life . I hope that the work in the garden helps you balance the sorrows. c

Good to see you checking in Steven...ditto what everyone especially C has said. Becky