It was hard and sad at times to think of all my hard work just disappearing into lawn again. After a period of time, I just started making plans, then I ordered 15 yards of topsoil and brought the garden with me.

What I have learned is, even if you move to the other side of town, you're not guaranteed to be able to take your plants with you, because each house has it's own type of soil and light conditions. But that also means, you get to grow stuff at one house you didn't at another. I became a whiz at growing sun worshippers in hell strips, but my current home has only dappled shade or full shade. I had to start over. Oh how I wish I could grow Delphiniums and Lilacs, but they hate the south. So if I moved to the east coast, I'd be happy I finally got to grow them. I'm not gonna lie, it's been difficult every time. They're like children of mine and I hate to let go. I left behind daffodils that my grandmother grew and I can't go back and get more, she died. I've left behind plants that were hard to grow from seed, but I did it. And haven't replaced them.

I guess I see it as being like Johnny Appleseed, leaving plants for others to enjoy everywhere I go. And miss them every second. Take loads of pictures and make a plant diary of what you had. I didn't realize how much I would forget until I went back and read from a couple of years ago. It triggered my mind to think of the plants I'd tried and wanted to try again.

Tell your husband not to move! I still pine for California. I've been gone over 30 years and I miss it so much, it aches. What beauty and abundance. It's no crazier a place than the rest of the world, so just stay and bear it! :)

I let it be known that if we move, I'm taking the boxwood hedging with me. I've spent years trimming that into shape, and couldn't bear it to be tossed in the trash by some non-gardening future owner. And the compost comes too.

Alternatively, I'm seriously thinking if we moved, I'd make it a condition that if the new owner decided to rip out the garden, they had to offer the local gardening club the opportunity to remove whatever they wanted first.

If we move back to England, I'd be so excited about being able to grow roses again without Japanese beetles, and vegetables all year round, I probably wouldn't worry.

I have a friend who lives in Napa Valley. She and her husband travel frequently and sometimes can't arrange for care of their gardens while they're away.

Early last summer, there was a heatwave in Napa while my friends were on tour. Temperatures went over 100 degrees. Absolutely everything in their gardens was fried by the time they returned.

My friend took it philosophically. Her response: "Well, it just means we get to go shopping for all new plants next spring!" :o)

So I guess the moral of that story is, there's always something new at your local nursery waiting for you to bring it home.

Karen

oh mercy I've done it and done it.........my garden in Chicago was a 10-year project of learning and loving. I'd got it to where I could get an armful of flowers weekly and beautiful dirt, compost, etc. Poof, off to Israel. No midwest gardners needed; now I was in for no snow, no frost, sheeting floods in winter and summer hell drought. Ten years I terraced, tried, composted, grew fabulous lavender and rosemary, learned Middle east garden on a 45 degree angle tricks. DG says move, poof we move. I took very few of the old plants with me, and most of those died, and here I am starting anew. Saw old garden this week: completely ignored and in disrepair. New house, very little garden open space, mostly room for containers and a few perennials, lots of shade (great for cooling, not so good for growing). Again, I must still find a place for the compost pile, dig and see what kind of soil I have (rocky, no worms, millions of slugs) figure out where the sun is likely to be in seasons I haven't been here for yet, and put nearly everything in pots and move them around to see where they are happiest before I plant them, which will take at least a whole year of seasons before I can say I understand how to garden here. At which point DG has informed me that we will probably stay here for a "few" years, and then move again so the investment in the house is worth it.
I have left more fully functioning gardens, after years of work, than I care to think about. But, I taught myself how to garden, what works/doesn't in a new country. I NEED to garden, and though I sometimes seethe with envy for gardens that I can work and grow for more that a decade, it's the process that I really need. Playing in the dirt. Plant stuff, have fun, learn, get dirty. Move, give as much as you can away, bless the garden that held you, and move on to a new embrace. Start again.
Batya

Thanks so much for sharing with me, you guys and giving me perspective.

Batya, you have such a good point... that part of the point is to have fun playing in the dirt and having pretty flowers. Sure, it's nice to see the results of 10 years of work... but even if you're at a place for a very short time, you still get to play in the dirt.

After working on my garden for almost 20 years it was really sad to leave it. But I gave away many of my plants to friends and it feels good to know they have a part of my garden. I even gave my pond & fish to krista. What a day that was, disassembling and moving everything to her house. And I was happy to hear that when she moved she took the pond with her!
But giving up my garden in Michigan was balanced by moving to a place where I can garden all year! I used to take zillions of photographs of my garden and I still have many of them. In fact the wallpaper on my computer right now is a shot of my Michigan gaden in winter.