Prayers for my Dear Hubby

14 years ago

I want to thank you all for the prayers and good wishes for my DH who was fighting 2 lung cancers. He endured 35 Chemo treatments and 33 Radiology treatments. We hoped so that we were seeing progress-but we were not. He passed on Nov. 4- from an artery being broken open by the tumor's letting loose. NOT a pleasant death but he was saved a horriffic long lasting lung cancer death. I am so thankful for that for him.

My last Chemo I suffered from bad allergic reactions. My hands and feet swole up and burned like they had been burned-with pins and needle stickings. They are are in the process of peeling. My throat and tongue swelled also.

I also have been busy trying to make up for time sent with DH getting the winterizing done.

Today I am going back for my 6th chemo out of 8. I surely wish for more of your wonderful prayers. I don't think I could take any more like tha last one.

Thanking all of my Garden Junk friends for Staying with me in thought. Love, Jlily

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Comments (26)

Marlene Kindred
14 years ago
Oh....I am SO sorry about your wonderful husband...I know he endured so many hardships. I know that he is no longer in pain and that God welcomed him with open arms. I will continue to think of you and wish you continued strength. God bless you jlily.....

((Big Hug))
sunnyca_gw
14 years ago
I'm sorry to hear that all that treatment your DH endured didn't work. Glad he went fairly quickly in the end. So hard to watch them suffer. Now it all falls on you to keep up with the house, yard etc. Be sure to take a day for yourself every so often to go to lunch with a friend or curl up with a good book & "take care of you". Christmas will be hard so plan a few fun things with friends or GK's- make cookies, take in a movie, I hear the new Mary Poppins movie has some Fred Astaire like dancing that is wonderful, take GK's caroling in neighborhood. Just really helps. I lost my DH in Sept. many yrs ago so it will be hard getting through holidays, but changing a lot of things around will help. Don't have to spend money, invite old friend over, visit a nursing home friend, window shop or even sit in car & watch people shop. If you have snow make a snowman in your front yard.Don't feel like decorating for Christmas-bring in some pine or spruce sprigs, etc & add a candle & few colored ball ornaments, it will lift your spirits. See what's new in books at the library. I always liked antiques, I checked out books at library & ended up asking for books on antiques for gifts from family, you can spend hours looking & studying 1 book. Get a watercolor paint pad & some cheap watercolors & see if you have any talent. New hobby can do wonders.Life won't be the same but it can be good if you work at it!! Hugs & prayers, Jan
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Want to give an long over do update.. Hubby's last treatment (chemo & radiation) were 12/23. He was supposed to finish radiation 2 days sooner but had complications with neck burns; they had to get his pain under control. I asked the radiation oncologist for the morphine pops again; this time he gave it to us but it was a 3 day wait for it to get ordered. I'd called pharmacies in both NJ & Philly; no one stocked it, not even hospitals. He ended up using a Fentynol patch for a few days; he was only able to wear it for a few hours as the Fentynol made him sick. They are supposed to be a 24 hour patch. The pain problem was a dry neck - he couldn't have the antibiotic cream on his neck for radiation because he'd fry; which meant he had to go from the shower, we'd wrap his neck in wet gauze & baby wash cloths plus an ace bandage then he'd unwrap when we crossed the bridge. He lost over 20 pounds, which he couldn't afford to lose anything. Healing was very hard on him. He did so well at 1st but his autoimmune kicked in about 2 weeks out to where his blood counts were really low. I ended up taking him to a natural Dr where he had supplements & a vitamin C drip which seemed to work; unfortunately, he needed 2 drips per week but we couldn't fit 2 into our life (it was an all day thing with ride plus waiting for the bag to drip) plus he did not like the way the girls stuck him or pulled the IV out. His body was still sore from all the needles in Philly, he didn't need more pain. Yes, we complained... He got very depressed because he wasn't healing quick enough. I could not get his mood changed. Different antidepressants were tried but nothing worked. What ended up working was our old neighbors came up from Tennessee on Valentines day (he didn't know); so that cheered him. Then we made the decision to have the feeding tube removed. The feeding tube was a huge source of pain; his intestines always hurt; he was usually found doubled up in pain. It was thought he had gas but from what I researched it could have been spasms. Any puree's that I made, he basically shut down & wouldn't eat them, nor would he eat by mouth because he had no taste buds and no saliva. To someone that likes to eat, this is very depressing. He'd tell me that the puree would sit in his stomach & not digest. We saw the radiation nurse practitioner and I was able to speak to her alone.. she backed me up that the tube needed to come out & that he needed to be able to sink or swim. Had he not started eating, they would either feed him via nose or another feeding tube. On 2/22 we saw the ENT surgeon & lied about how much he was eating by mouth; they pulled the feeding tube out.. yes, held a towel over it and yanked & out it came. 5 months after it was put in, it was taken out & he's been doing well eating. His taste buds are better; he's not complaining about the saliva as he knows he's going to have to drink water with almost every bite just to swallow it. Most food will suck up his saliva like a sponge. We knew our health insurance was going to get canceled & it did. He was going to start physical therapy 2 weeks ago when they called to say it was denied for lack of coverage. We've been on this since December, asking for Cobra forms but they never came. Thankfully I know the rep; he told me when it was sent out & when it did not arrive the following Monday & Tuesday (last week) hubby & I made the 2 hour drive to Port Newark to do it in person. We split the driving because neither of us drive that far. The insurance cost us a pretty penny until we are approved; then they will either refund the money, if hubby gets back to work before we use up our large payment or they will deduct the lower amount from my large payment until he does work. He had a PET scan on 2/4 - we were not supposed to get the results until the following week but the nurse practitioner called us the same day because she knew how depressed he was. He told me a week or 2 before the scan that he was not fighting any more nor was he doing this again if treatment did not work; so I was a basket case as well; especially since it was right before my dad's 4 year anniversary of being gone because of cancer. Had we not had my inheritance from my dad I don't know what we would have done to survive. We were very fortunate that we did move to where we are so he had better treatment options. After making the drive to North Jersey the other day, there was no way he could get treated at my original choice, where my dad had treatment; but he was able to get treated at a very large place; which I'm not sure he would have chosen had we still lived in the old house. So, everything has worked out. The next scan will be in 5 months; so we'll see. I'm not sure when he'll be able to get back into his truck to deliver cars; but hopefully he'll be able to do the yard van to drive drivers to their cars. Hopefully physical therapy will help.
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jeannespines
14 years ago
Good thoughts and prayers coming your way, jlily...may God hold you in His arms as you receive another treatment. May He provide you peace of mind with wonderful memories of your DH and family blessings in your life. Take many deep breaths and exhalations remembering to turn to Him, your family and friends...you are not alone, dear woman. From a GJ friend, Jeanne S.
excessfroufrou
14 years ago
My heart goes out to you, along with some special prayers. I can't even imagine what ya'll have been and are going through. Jan had some really good ideas to help make it through the holidays. I hope your next treatment leaves you feeling better than the last one.
Syble
susiewantsroses
14 years ago
Just remember sweet friend that your Chemo treatments could very well work and you will get well! Even though your husband's treatment was not a success does not mean that you cant win your fight! I pray a renewed will to live and a strength that will carry you through these next treatments. Your life may take on a whole new purpose after you pull through this.

KEEP ON TRUCKIN'SISTA!!!!! YOU WILL BE LEFT WITH AN INVINSIBLE STRENGTH WHEN THIS IS OVER. YOUR EXAMPLE WILL BE A GIFT TO MANY PEOPLE.
daisydal
14 years ago
It seems so unfair sometimes what we are given to deal with. You are my new inspiration for strength, Jlily. My heart hurts for you and I know you are grieving as well as being in so much pain. God has not forsaken you, continue to place your trust in Him. Have Faith for a glorious recovery because angels are all around you.We don't understand, yet. But all of our answers are waiting for us in Heaven. This is just our trials and tribulations period. Your crown is going to be beautiful for all you have endured. My prayers are with you.
blessings-sherri
nonacook
14 years ago
I am sending prayers your way. It has been a little over 2 years since I lost Bill to 2 types of cancer, one being lung cancer. You will find the strength to go on, and God will be with you in your own struggle with that dreadful disease. Hopefully your next treatment will be different
than the last. Bless you!
princess_mimi
14 years ago
I'm so sorry to hear you lost your Dear Husband. I will be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers. Folks here are good support and I'm sure that you have support people in your life at home. Lean on them when you need to.

Life does seem to get overwhelming sometimes but then I remember that "the Lord tries those that he loves". Then I think.....I must be His favorite! Sounds like you're on his list of favorites too!

Keep a smile in your heart when you can't keep one on your face.

We love you.

~~Mimi
Purplemoon
14 years ago
Jlily, I am so terribly sorry for the loss of your husband.
There really are no words, nor can I begin to imagine what you've been thru. You have been, and will remain, in my heart and prayers.
Especially am praying now the doctors can do something to keep you from having such a bad reaction to the next treatment.
I hope you have help and all the normal chores, like preparing for winter, don't fall totally on your shoulders.

Wishing you strength, in body and spirit.
Thank you too for being able to come here and let us know what has happened.

hugs from my heart,
Karen
leveta
14 years ago
My heart felt condolences and I'm so sorry that your health is fragile. Pleas take time for yourself...
jlily
Original Author
14 years ago
Thank you all for your prayers and support.

My chemo has been changed to a weaker one. So far no bad reactions. I will have to take 6 treatments of this one-one a week. One down. So 5 to go.

Our fmily will all be here for Thanksgiving-my middle son coming home to fix the turkey. That will be a treat.

Blessings to you all. Love, Jlily
sunnyca_gw
14 years ago
Glad to hear they lowered the dose so you wouldn't get so sick! Hope rest of them go smoothly so should be able to start New Year without any more treatments!! Hugs & prayers for speedy recovery & safe travel for your DS & family members coming for Thanksgiving. Hope there are some wonderful leftovers to freeze so you don't have to cook so much for yourself. Jan
jeannespines
14 years ago
Good news, jlily..thinking of you & happy to hear that an adjustment was made & worked for you. :-)

God bless & enjoy your family-time over the holidays! Jeanne S.
concretenprimroses
14 years ago
Jily, so sorry about the loss of your dear husband. I'm glad that your treatments are getting a little easier. I hope that you have lots of family and friends nearby for the holidays.
Kathy
akup_a
14 years ago
Thinking of you today Jlily and sending a special prayer just for you. How's the chemo treatments going?
Vickie
leveta
14 years ago
I'm so sorry to read about Dear Hubby...My heart felt prayers to you...
sunnyca_gw
14 years ago
I've been thinking about you & hoping you are finished with the chemo! I know it will be a hard Christmas with DH. My 1st 1 was but I had family & babies around from relatives so that helped. Hope you have friends & relatives to help you through it. Hugs & prayers that 2010 will go much better for you!! Jan
luna_llena_feliz
14 years ago
Jlily, I am so sorry to hear that your husband passed. How devastating it must be for you! Especially with what you are enduring. You and your medical team will be in my thoughts and prayers.

(((((HUGS)))))

Kathy
katishooked
14 years ago
Jlily, my thots and prayers are with you. You have endured so much already. Hope you and yours will have a peaceful and joyous Christmas season. Bless you.

Kat
tennesseetrash
14 years ago
Sad to read this post Jlily. So very sorry that your husband passed.

Wishing you the best of luck with your treatments! I hope to hear some good news from you with a bit of time. Please keep us posted when possible.

Hugs ~tenderlee
jlily
Original Author
14 years ago
Thank you all for the prayers and kind thoughts. I still have 2 treatments to go. I got a virus and had to be hospitalized for a bit. Hopefully tomorrow I can get back on schedule.

Merry Christmas to all! Love, Jlily
jeannespines
14 years ago
jlily .. good to hear from you & am glad you are over the virus...it's been wicked for alot of people! Ok, 2 more to go...continued good thoughts & prayer continuing...you are not alone, dear woman...God will be holding you in His hands. So, hang in there! Blessings to you and your family through this time of illness & the loss of your DH. Keep talking all those good memories this holiday season! Hugs to you, Jeanne S.
kirkus
14 years ago
Yes...BIG BEAR HUGS to you. Carol and I will be lifting you up in prayer this holiday season. Keep your hubby's memory alive...remember the wonderful times. We lost my parents and brother right before Christmas... made it through by remembering the good times. On a side note, my Dad had bought Christmas presents for us boys right before he died...you can imagine the joy as we we opened his gifts on Christmas Day. We'll be thinking of you. Bear Hugs! Kirk
sunnyca_gw
14 years ago
Jilly, glad you are down to last 2 hope it is last 2 ever!! Hope you are with friends & family for Christmas (& that they do all the work) Hugs & prayers that you will heal completely!! Jan
Purplemoon
14 years ago
Jlily, its good to hear from you. Tho being so sick with a virus and in the hospital not so good news. You will stay in my thoughts and prayers as you get thru two more treatments, and this 'first' Christmas.
May you be surrounded with love from family and friends.

hugs, Karen
luna_llena_feliz
14 years ago
I will continue to keep you in my thoughts and prayers, jlily. I agree with Jan, I hope these last two treatments are your last 2 ever. Merry Christmas too!

Prayers for my Dear Hubby

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