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eld6161

Why do you come here?

last year
last modified: last year

The Kitchen Table

“This is a place where you can chat about topics not covered by the other forums. Like, why is one leg of the table always shorter than the other three?”

I appreciate knowing that there is a place that I can go 24/7 to talk about nothing and everything. A really good sounding board of people with empathy, knowledge and camaraderie.

When I am so sure I am right, and I come here and twenty of you say no, it has always been in my best interest to heed the advice!

While many here might be upset that our topics can only go so far, I value The Kitchen Table as a place to escape the everyday trials, personal and political.

Back to my question, why do come here?

Comments (86)

  • last year

    " for companionship since literally all my best friends have died "

    I missed this at first reading. I'm very sorry, each loss must have been difficult for you.

    I'm approaching an age when the infirmities of advancing years are starting to be experienced among my friends and family members. It's a factor for the stage of life I'm in that has a bit too much reality of the unwelcome kind in it to quickly accept.

    eld6161 thanked Elmer J Fudd
  • last year

    I've met a lot of VERY kind and caring people here. I consider many of you a friend.


    I like joining in discussions about decorating, the price of eggs...and the joys of retirement.....FUN subjects. I learn a few things too. ie: Celery is a nitrate. Or, Yeti mugs hold hot & cold really well. Or....body pillows are used on beds now as a decor item. You know .... useful things! 🎓

    eld6161 thanked nicole
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  • last year
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    Somehow, I knew the thread would be papered with comments, but no actual answers to the question, by one.

    Garden Party shut down, but that was the Gardenweb side. We were always warned not to come over to the KT side. I found y'all interesting and warm and welcoming. I miss the chili dog champion of jasdip's trivia. And all his pictures. I still love "Danny's" smiles and show me you yours/show me mine threads. But mostly, I love that we show each other what's going on in our lives, whether it's a book, or something else. I've actually met a couple of people in person. And that makes it even better.

    eld6161 thanked rob333 (zone 7b)
  • last year

    I look forward to the smile post each morning and also the photo sharing. Living alone can sometimes feel disconnected and checking in here makes me feel like I have heard from a friend. There are many kind people here who helped me at a time when I was going through a particularly difficult time in my life and their support and kind words mean more than I can say. There was a time when we did "swaps" with other members and I still have and enjoy all the items I received from swap partners. This is a good place.

    eld6161 thanked satine100
  • last year
    last modified: last year

    Satine, you once helped me by saying, “Don’t stumble on something behind you.”

    So true!

  • last year

    It makes me feel good to know I have helped someone else. You too helped me, Eld.

    eld6161 thanked satine100
  • last year

    "Somehow, I knew the thread would be papered with comments, but no actual answers to the question, by one."


    Funny enough, I responded to the question. I missed your response, is it here before this most recent comment?

  • last year

    I come here because often I read about something new & different to think about - technology, ideas, opinions and the like. I come here for entertainment because I like Annie’s threads on Smiles, Show me yours, and What are you reading. I come here because I like Jasdips puzzles and the Strands puzzle. I also follow several garden group topics because yard design is my passion. But mostly I come here because of the diverse & international group of people who freely share their ideas and opinions as well as offering their help and ideas to those who ask for them. I think most of the frequent posters are kindred spirits and that makes this a nice place to visit.

    Side note: I had never heard the adage eld616 quoted ”Don’t stumble…”. Today, for me personally, reading that quote has given me a boost that I badly need. It will be my mantra for my current healing journey.

    eld6161 thanked KW PNW Z8
  • last year
    last modified: last year

    Interesting. Could have been talking about FOAS. Yet, it's all about somebody else. The above kind of proves it's about somebody else??? There are just as many comments from food. I'm so glad blue is your favorite color. I actually give a more complicated answer. My house has grey-blues, grey-greens and just plain greys. I would never paint my car that color. My garden has every color of flower except gray or brown or beige. I love pink pens! I have pink highlighters, pink ink pens, pink sharpies... I don't have one favorite color. I'm addicted to pink pens.


    P.S. I'm sure this will come as a complete shock to most people but my favorite color is.... Robin's Egg Blue


    eld6161 thanked rob333 (zone 7b)
  • last year

    My blue comment was intended to be a sassy response to food, which he acknowledged. Another swing and a miss for you.

  • last year
    last modified: last year

    You're so cute. Another swing and a miss for you, because I was alluding to what you said. I'm so sorry you didn't get it.

  • last year

    I like to read here because I am always finding out things I didn't know! Almost every single day!


    I need to remember the "don't stumble......." quote! Just yesterday I was seriously dwelling on something that happened, I kid you not, in 1979 or 1980!!!!! I don't know why but it's like 1979/80 came back with a vengeance! A stupid high school girl being stupid as kids can be, I was feeling very stupid for the things I had done! UGH!

    eld6161 thanked arkansas girl
  • last year

    "Yesterday is gone and tomorrow hasn't happened. Focus on today."


    I don't even remember who said it. It wasn't even said to me. But I read it here, and it helps me so much when I get stuck.


    "Don't stumble on something behind you" is equally brilliant.

    eld6161 thanked Ally De
  • last year

    I think I started coming to houzz/gardenweb/whatever for the decorating adivce but then that evolved into the chitchat which I really enjoy. I "needed" the decor part because I guess I recognized that I was more interested in that than many of my friends and this was a ready made connunity.

    I don't like the political posts and try to steer away from them but I unfortunately don't always have the best discipline and at times, allow myself to get drawn in. I'm working on that though.


    I really do enjoy the chitchat and find I learn so much here. I know that 99% of the time ( or at least it feels that way) that if I have a question about almost anything----that I can ask it here and get a good answer.

    Great topic.


    eld6161 thanked salonva
  • last year
    last modified: last year

    Arkansas, I do the same thing. For whatever reason something can trigger a random thought way back in the past.

    Is it more common as we age to want a do-over on these, in the scheme of things, tiny interactions?

    Ally De, I like that quote as well. I’ve wasted so much time worrying about things out of my control.

  • last year

    Eld, same here. I can get caught up in worry a lot lately, and unfortunately most of my worry is not in any way useful. All it does is wreck some happiness for today.


    So I try to decide if I can do anything useful about what I'm worried about. If yes, do it. If no...then yesterday is gone and tomorrow hasn't happened. Focus on today.


    One never knows what silly little saying may really help someone. The internet is a big place. :)


    It's nice knowing that the kindness one shows here, or thoughtful comments of some sort, may make someone's day even a little bit better. There's a lot of that here.

    eld6161 thanked Ally De
  • last year

    if you look up the word "hermit" in the dictionary, my picture will be there. i have very few IRL friends and that's by choice, i'm the farthest thing from a social butterfly you will ever find.

    i started out at the pets forum here, for reasons probably pretty obvious to anyone who looks at my pictures, but that forum is nearly dead so i gravitated here.

    i enjoy hearing about and seeing photos of places i've always thought i'd like to visit but never will. i live vicariously through many KT members while it sit in my little corner of the world. :)

    eld6161 thanked Ninapearl
  • last year
    last modified: last year

    Well I wrote a long story yesterday but I guess I forgot to hit submit. Geesh.

    I have been at the Kitchen Table since 2009. I don't come as often now but I like to pop in to see the familiar names and catch up on the latest. There is almost always something I can find to read. I know some of you better than others but I find all of you interesting and informative. I appreciate you.


    Rob, I just reread your post where you mentioned the many colors in your life. That might make an interesting topic. Do most people go for neutrals or are people of many colors? Just a thought. I would fall into the "many colors" category.

    eld6161 thanked murraysmom Zone 6a OH
  • last year
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    Well, as I said before, the ”Smiles” thread. I also like the cooking, decorating, and gardening. I enjoy hearing about areas of the country and foods that I have to look up the definition. I had to do that with my parent’s 1940’s cookbook!

    I DO NOT like any political or arguing! I detest know-it-alls. I will and do drop a thread if that happens.

    I had hoped to travel all over after we retired, but that did not work out. I get to ”travel” here all over the US, Canada, Europe, and Australia, just to name a few.

    eld6161 thanked Sherry8aNorthAL
  • last year

    salonva, your comment about this being a ready made community for your decorating interest resonates with me. I said earlier that gardening design is my passion. That’s why I started coming to Houzz. I searched & found the KT topic because it was referred to in other topic posts. But, the community of gardeners on most of the garden related topics is wonderful. It allows me to discuss gardening as much as I want to. Though my friends & neighbors do ask me questions about their personal landscapes because they’re very aware of my love of garden design, I know I can talk to them about gardening in general only so much before their eyes glaze over.😁 Here, there’s no limits since people can easily escape. That’s a wonderful thing.

    eld6161 thanked KW PNW Z8
  • last year

    lucille - you’re so clever! Love it!

    eld6161 thanked KW PNW Z8
  • last year

    ^^ That’s why I come here!

  • last year

    Great, now I have an earworm.

  • last year
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    And there you have it, our theme song!

  • last year
    last modified: last year

    I'd like to encourage our silent readers to chime in. It's lovely to just 'tune in', but this is not some closed corporation. Come one! Come all!

    eld6161 thanked chisue
  • last year
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    Chise II agree. Lurkers should feel welcome to join in. It doesn’t have to be lengthy. Sometimes just a quick, “ I agree with Chisue on that.” is all it takes to contribute.

  • last year

    Lucille has a creative streak

    Words fly from her keyboard

    But try to cross her with a view

    And out will come her trusty sword


    The idea to rhyme was hers alone

    And it was sure a good one

    Not easy to express one's thoughts

    And do it having fun


    Imitation is flattery

    That's something we all know

    This weak effort now will end

    And won't further darken the show

    eld6161 thanked Elmer J Fudd
  • last year

    Elmer, you made me laugh!! Thanks!

  • last year

    Lucille's comment inspired me.

  • last year

    Good show, Elmer!

  • last year

    One reason that I like this forum is because I find that folks here seem to be old enough to remembe,r know .and to remember what civil discourse is and respect decency,


    I find so much of Reddit is young people who have no shame in how they present themselves to the world with incoherent brain droppings and vulgarity and a great deal of total ignorance, about anything. Some go so far as to give themselves vulgar and demeaning names online and cant write more than one sentence responses that are so darned stupid that it is downright heartbreaking for our society and our country and our young people. They .have no shame and no pride.

    I would like to enjoy Reddit as they cover so many topics. Even the topics that you might think would not appeal to that crowd, like home repair or cooking seem to attract those with poor communication skills and a lack of decency. I feel as if I am in a real time loop of "Idiocracy".


    TikTok is all about dead brain cells and idiotic behavior.

    Some here may argue about this or that, but there is not the sophomoric idiocy that I see elsewhere.

    eld6161 thanked jehanne hansen
  • last year

    Elmer, you may be contrary but you are not vulgar and offensive. I respect a bit of dissent and contrariness. I dont always agree with you, but you dont express yourself with incoherence and vulgarity.

    eld6161 thanked jehanne hansen
  • last year

    Jehanne, all good points. However, to me name calling is offensive as well as trying to prove a point to make someone feel less then.

    While these threads have a way of going off course as IRL conversations can,it gets tiresome when the comment is always about correcting others.

    Then the whole thread turns to that comment and it never ends well.

  • last year
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    jehanne, in defense of the young people online, they really don’t stand a chance when you read what is put both online and spoken out loud by some in leadership roles. And those folks have attained very important positions in life.

    eld6161 thanked roxsolid
  • last year

    When the blind lead the blind, can good be a result? I've thought of the internet as 'The Wisdom of Crowds'. Maybe all this 'communication' isn't so wonderful. Too much? All the time? How is it the KT escapes?


    eld6161 thanked chisue
  • last year

    chisue, I would say that the Bots that populate most forums are the cause of that.

    eld6161 thanked murraysmom Zone 6a OH
  • last year
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    eld6161, there are people who react to a disagreement or questioning of something they've said as if it were a personal affront or attack. I see that often here if you don't. I never intentionally antagonize anyone but for when people wrongly make personal comments about me when seemingly having nothing else relevant to say..

    eld6161 thanked Elmer J Fudd
  • last year

    I’ve been told I have a dry sense of humor. I know that in face to face conversations I can be quick to retort with a somewhat sarcastic remark. Of course, my intention isn’t to be sarcastic or offending but to be funny. That works out fine when the other person(s) knows me & can read my facial expression. When posting online I try to remember that no one knows me or my sparkling personality 😊personally & no one can see my smile when I might be delivering a zinger. I do read my posts before hitting submit. I have deleted entire posts without hitting that button. I’ve no doubt there are more of my posts that I should’ve done that with. But, when I’ve been taken aback by a response to me I try to take a deep breath & remember that the reply likely wasn’t meant to hurt but is only a lively back & forth.

    eld6161 thanked KW PNW Z8
  • last year

    KW very true. That can happen. But the examples I am talking about, the name calling, can’t be interpreted any other way.

  • last year
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    " I’ve been told I have a dry sense of humor. I know that in face to face conversations I can be quick to retort with a somewhat sarcastic remark. "

    I could have made a similar comment about myself, KW, except it wasn't something I needed to be told.

    I realized way back in my youth, and I'm thinking about specific examples from Jr High and later that are vivid in my memory, that there are times when either someone is talking or something happens that triggers a thought in my mind that I think is funny, about which I can have trouble not wanting to share it immediately with others. My self-control has improved a tad as the years have passed but not entirely.

    All my kids have a sense of humor similar to mine and they usually enjoy my sharing what Carlin might have called Brain Droppings. My wife, who I can say here privately doesn't have a very good sense of humor, usually sees nothing funny in such thoughts that come to me. No matter.

    eld6161 thanked Elmer J Fudd
  • last year

    eld6161 - I do understand that your examples are different. To clarify - my comments in my post are all about me. The discussion caused me to think about my posts & the thought process I go through when posting.

    Elmer - not everyone appreciates or understands dry sense of humor. I heard an adult telling my dad that he had no doubt I was my father’s daughter as I had the same dry sense of humor he (my dad) had. I have to say that for me it’s a family trait from my dad that is shared by me & my sibs. When we were all adults & we had family gatherings we used to drive our mom out of the room with our back & forth style of humor & repartee. Your private note about the difference between your wife’s style of humor & yours & your kids made me laugh thinking about my mom! She’d have much empathy for your wife! I am certain though that like my mom, your wife treasures the sight & sound of her husband and children laughing together!

    eld6161 thanked KW PNW Z8
  • last year

    The dry sense of humor angle has me pondering....


    I have a dry sense of humor myself and a lot of what has been said upthread is resonating with me. In my younger days my mother found my sense of humor incomprehensible, whereas my dad would almost always instantly get it.


    I can - usually - detect dry humor online. I enjoy the written word (and obviously I prattle on way too long online myself too), so again, in general I think I can tell when someone is going for droll vs. antagonistic. It's something to keep in mind anyway.

    eld6161 thanked Ally De
  • last year
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    I'm not so sure. she does as others might. But her sense of humor is limited all the same.

    Last night we were watching a funny movie on TV. One of the ones that would appear on any "20 Funniest Movies of All Time" list. Stupid joke after stupid joke after obvious straight man setup followed by pun after pun, and repeat. I'm not one who typically talks to screens or other inanimate objects (recall recent thread on that topic) and I didn't do so. I was laughing so hard at times that I had to stand up and to take deep breaths. She's not a reserved person, not by any means, but her reactions were periodic smiles or covering her eyes. No audible laughs. I asked when over if she thought it was funny and the response was "It was okay".

    eld6161 thanked Elmer J Fudd
  • last year
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    I really love both the rhymes! I totally mean that.

    I wasn't even being dry. I was totally poking at ya, elmer (yes, you. You have one answer to things, and it's always your answer. you think it's the only right answer. Every time). I gave you a complex reply to something that you answered simply. You seem to think things are black and white, and I was pointing out that you might not notice that there are nuances in life. If we're going to analyze things.

    eld6161 thanked rob333 (zone 7b)
  • last year

    I want to know what movie made Elmer laugh so much!

    eld6161 thanked MrsM
  • last year

    We can all use a good laugh.

  • last year
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    Airplane!

    On Tubi.

    eld6161 thanked Elmer J Fudd
  • last year

    " You seem to think things are black and white, and I was pointing out that you might not notice that there are nuances in life. "

    If you're talking about me, I can respond with one word - Wrong!

  • last year

    20 some years ago we moved to a new home. I worked at a local greenhouse and started collecting hosta. Garden Web was a great place to get educated on hosta. While there I found a couple other spots that I found fun when establishing a garden. Then one day Houzz took over. My garden well established I branched out looking for advise on paint colors for our house. Fast Forward to the last five years or so and now it's more about seeing the inside of minds that are firmly in the 20% of all the 80/20 cultural issues. I've lived among the 80% all my life. I don't think I believed adults in the USA could be so unaware of human nature/science/facts. I thought all this influencer/social media contagion one hears about could not possibly be real, adults who have full use of their brains are still stuck in adolescent lala land. It's fascinating. Maybe it's the socioeconomic disparity. There are many people here who seem to have an amazing about of discretionary spending money, possibly that breeds these trains of thought I don't know? It's beyond anything I've ever encountered or believed could be true.

    eld6161 thanked arcy_gw