I forgot to mention that I travel with an 8 year old boy! Do you mind if he tags along? He would love that pool! Your house is so wonderful, I'm so glad that you took the time to post pictures. I can only imagine the work involved but thank goodness you didn't tear it down! As for the chandelier, yeah, it may not matter what you put there! But, if you want to stay with that cottage cape cod feel consider finding something with more visual weight, and not so many lines. A lantern could be perfect. I don't know if you've ever seen the Currey and Co chandeliers? I love to go to their site just to look at their products, even when i'm not really shopping. This particular chandelier caught my eye for your room. Somethign simple, with some visual weight, although I'm not crazy about the black for your room. But maybe this will spark some ideas... Here is a link that might be useful: Currey and Co chandelier

You should remove the clock and replace the firebox with a gas insert that wraps around the corner. I might also replace the stone on the floor with a solid surface or tile. But, frankly, I agree with your husband. A cleaner look would update this a lot.

absolutely redo the landscaping. that could look amazing w/the right type of design. You could sand those wood planks by the stairs and stain them w/a cedar or redwood stain color, apply a good Marine varnish over it. The wood will look like the wood on these stairs. it would look cool if you did some stone ground covering and some nice plants I know these are black, but the navy isn't too far off. just look at all the diff designs you could do for that front. it would be stunning! I'd consider painting the cement foundation the same color as your siding. looks choppy right now. Here they painted it black to match the siding. when the landscaping gets done, it will conceal a lot of it or you could do some stone on that portion and do the plantings around the foundation level like this similar blue siding color. you could do something like this w/the cedar shake. I love this black/dark charcoal. just to show you what some hardscape (the stone work) and landscaping plantings could do

Since you don't want to make any structural changes, I think all you can do is remove the wallpaper, paint, and add some great towels and maybe art. I don't dislike the picture that I can see, but it doesn't seem special with everything else. I wouldn't paint laminate cabinets that are in good condition. What do you consider "updated" to look like? That would help this board in helping you select a paint color for the walls.