1. Ok kiddies - be nice.

2. When remodeling, always assume the worst and hope for the best.

3. Bad design is a daily irritant. Its the burr in your sock, the hair in your salad, the squeeze your bum against the island to open the fridge door. Good design is invisible, so many do not see the effort needed to achieve good design, as opposed to bad design.

4. Note to self, never build a house during a pandemic!

5. If you want something to look like something it isn't, try to do a convincing job of it.

6. The true test of a marriage is trying to build a house together.

7. Maybe a few sessions with a marriage counselor to help through this [the build] process?

8. I hope you came to Houzz wearing your big boy pants, because the posts that get the most criticism are the house plans. Not because we are nasty so-and-so's, but because the plans actually need it.

9. You have to take comments with a grain of salt, rather, a salt mine. Realize that most on this forum have an appreciation for design and art - there is an idealism, a perfection, and maybe a little OCD in arriving at the best possible solution. However, there is no perfection that can be achieved in building design.

10. As the saying goes (I think)...don't let perfect get in the way of good.

11. Custom is not a synonym for quality.

12. There are no rules w custom homes.

13. My father, a commercial GC, had a saying: The first cost is the least cost. Use quality materials and crews who know what they are doing. It might cost more up front but save across your lifetime in the house.

14. Not every designer, architect, builder or remodeler is right for every client.

15. They are opinions. Everyone has them. If you have been on this site long enough you would know that if you ask for opinions you will get them good and bad.

16. One of the best attributes of this forum is that everyone has an equal voice. But that is also its worst attribute. In this case, everyone having an equal voice is a curse to the OP because he/she will have a difficult time separating the wheat from the chaff. It is very difficult to determine the best advice when all advice is presented equally.

17. Good advice that gets ignored is #1 [mistakes dominating the forum] Reply: Getting mad at good advice is right up there.................ahead of ignoring the good advice.

18. It's tough to be sympathetic when OP sought advice, received it, then did not follow it and runs into problems as predicted.

19. This is not a "yes board" where people look at anything and say, "Oh, wonderful, wonderful! It's going to come out great". But you can get solid advice here.

20. This isn’t FB where all your buddies rave about your choices and applaud your good taste. Remember when you were in first grade and liked to draw pictures? Your mom and grandma oo’d and ah’d and put them all on their fridges? Then there was a Halloween picture contest at school and you didn’t win, didn’t even get a gold star? Same deal here.

21. I have never seen a project like this turn out good. The home owner thinks it looks good, the designer thinks it looks good, but every honest person knows the emperor is naked.

22. Coming to a forum like Houzz may improve your outcome, but the advice you will be given will be based on assumptions if you don't provide adequate information to elicit sound advice.

23. Be ready for some very blunt help from Houzz users. Just know that they are going to challenge you a lot during this process, but they will be immensely helpful if you have an open mind.

24. I’m so thankful for all of this input. Not going to lie - at times it’s been stressful to read. But I asked for the feedback and am so grateful for it!

25. It's a treat to read through this thread to see, not only the freely given and excellent advice, but your openness to hearing it!

26. I thought the OP was going for the train wreck look? Reply: Kindness goes a long way.

27. I never understand why someone comes on this site and then insults people who are asking design questions. The users of this site are here because they are interested in achieving the best design both functionally and aesthetically within their constraints or they are just interested in design.

28. Thread title: What height are 9' ceilings inside a home?

29. Isn’t it interesting how we all (yes, me included) assign our personal preferences to others’ projects?

30. Everything's easy when it's someone else's project.

31. Toilet closets are, of course, a matter of opinion. On this forum, a matter of very strong and vocal opinions.

32. For me, it’s not just a matter of privacy, but I also don’t like looking at toilets, especially if I’m taking a bath. And I don’t like looking at my partner on the toilet, also especially if I’m taking a bath. [And later edited to add:] Since things tend to get taken very literally around here, let me say the bathing/toilet part was said tongue-in-cheek. We have other toilets to use when needed.

33. There is something wrong with your house if the bathroom is a sanctuary.

34. I had a client tell me that she was disappointed in the architect that designed her home because "he gave her everything she asked for". It wasn't until she lived in the home that she realized she asked for the wrong things.

35. Too often, a bad result is the RESULT of someone knowing ....."exactly what I want". Of course you do, sweetie. But just as often out of context, not possible in a pleasing, comfortable, functional way. Many professionals will "yes" that person to a demise. Because to do the argument, education, and cajoling involved in dissuading is harder work, than the WORK.

36. We worked with an architect on three different residential projects and what I thought I wanted and what I know have and love were wildly different. His ideas were so beyond what I was capable to imagining. And to be honest, I didn't like some of them at first but when he explained his reasons, it made sense to me.

37. Hire someone you trust, and then TRUST them.

38. A house can be much more than how far the bathroom is from the bedroom at night.

39. I have lived long enough to know that unless something is our profession, we don’t know what we don’t know (thank you Sophie Wheeler for that saying.)

40. Where is Sophie when we need her most?

41. [What’s] required to obtain permits and get a contractor estimate for the build, approx a 3k square feet weekend house? The land is already there. Reply: Fortunate that the land is already there, really helps with the build.

42. Rudimentary software manipulation is not design.

43. Design is not like a computer program that anyone can access, where you input items and it spits out a result. Design is a transformational process, jumping in and out of macro and micro scale, where you conceive ideas, manipulate, try, adjust, and make decisions based on how your brain connects dots and views the world. Talent and creativity are just terms that grade the success in how your brain performs this process.

44. When you design a floor plan, you have to work in elevation and section simultaneously.

45. When designing a home, you need to consider how you live, how you want to live, and how you will realistically live given your circumstances.

46. Never try to design a house while pregnant and postpartum. I'm even rolling my eyes at me.

47. After building a house over the last two years, I would say that if you considered your current house a "Money Pit", just wait until you build...

48. The thing with building, is it costs what it costs and then some.

49. A broom is a great way to get to know your project.

50. Never EVER have relatives do any home design or construction or renovation work. I mean it. It is the path to woe on several levels.

51. The secret to good facade design is to find a simple, strong idea and use the materials to reinforce it.

52. Simple is never as simple as simple looks. It's a lot like "Just" . I “just” need this, I "just" want that. .......it's “just” a simple home, and we “just” live simply. Know when it's simple? When it's VERY well done, and you're thrilled......! Know that there is no "just" in design.

53. One person's cozy is another person's claustrophobic!

54. The question of licensing is often raised when a residential design appears amateurish or has some obvious flaws. I've seen enough poor-quality designs by licensed architects and enough good designs from un-licensed designers and un-licensed architects that I wouldn't correlate a poor design with a lack of a professional license.

55. I am pissed, I want to cancel and get a refund! I am actually thinking of lawyering up and going to Arbitration to get money back. Reply:You can make a small fortune chasing justice, just start with a large fortune.

56. Pragmatism when building a home will get you a lot further than battling your builder and their team for perfection. Mistakes happen on all sides and the best experiences are the ones where everyone works together with patience, understanding and mutual respect.

57. A word on contracts, clauses, and attorneys: Great builders typically build great houses. Don't get so hung up on the perfect contract that you overlook the perfect builder.

58. Cost/SF estimates regularly get Realtors, builders, homeowners and remodelers in trouble. Proceed with caution.

59. Thread title: Is a 60 inch freestanding bathtub large enough for an adult? Reply: Does it matter which side is up...?

60. OK, you can return to the silly banter.

Oh god. Number 28 gave me a laugh.

Thank you ARG, a great and well compiled list that highlights humor AND good advice. Well done!

(still contemplating 59)

Hey, I made the list at #13! Thanks, Dad!

and I can certainly relate to #53. I like cozy, but I’m also somewhat claustrophobic.

Am I #29? I often feel that way.

OMG, I made the list too! My first time. #20.

🥳

Number 46 made me lol. I add 30% to my hours estimate if the client is pregnant. Or an engineer.

Way to go ARG. Another good one!

Wonderful as always! Thank you for my smile today

Thank you - annually - for doing this. it's a real treat!

I always look forward to reading this! #’s 28 and 47 are treasures. Especially 28!

A fun read!

hope we learn something list worthy in 23

#20 isn't me, but certainly could have been as I've said it dozens of times.

@Joseph Corlett, LLC, see my comment above about #20.

#21 - I've used the Emperor Has No Clothes analogy several times.

I forgot I was looking forward to this!!! Thanks ARG.

Thank you to everybody who got a smile or took away something meaningful out of the list and responded. I really appreciate it as this takes a little bit of work every year to put it together.

And the best of luck to anybody in the middle of a building project!

My smile for the week.

Totally agree JDMCCL not only here on design but on most of the issues that plague us these days.

Again, I'm too nice to make the list. (But I'm working on it.)

I’ve never seen these lists before, but opened this today and saw a quote of mine.

Do I get a prize? A t-shirt would be great.

#47 was me! And no truer words were ever spoken by someone who had their a$$ handed to them by building a house.

Thanks ARG! You have made my day. I burst out laughing several times as I went through the list…😂

Now my goal is to make the 2023 list!!!!

Love your post!!!
My favorite is 11: Custom is not a synonym for quality.

Do I get a prize? A t-shirt would be great.

@Jilly No t-shirt but an original 48"x24" "Clouds with Smoke" painting suitable for framing and hanging over your fireplace.....(a little inside Houzz joke...lol.)

@Jinx No t-shirt but an original 48"x24" "Clouds with Smoke" painting suitable for framing and hanging over your fireplace.....(a little inside Houzz joke...lol.)

Sign me up for one too.

#28. Thanks for the morning chuckle!

I always love these. My favorites this year:

# 3, 8, 24, 28, 34, 47, 48

" 33. There is something wrong with your house if the bathroom is a sanctuary."

No, not the house. The relationships of people living in that house. (Although I must admit there was one occasion where as a kid I was GLAD I could use the bathroom as a sanctuary when I blew up at my mother for her stating I was 'always taking my father's side' when they were having marital difficulties - the only thing I said had effectively amounted to 'I don't want to get involved'. I was terrified and ran and hid in the bathroom for an hour or two. It was the only place i felt somewhat safe. So, maybe having bathroom sanctuaries isn't a bad idea? (She later apologized to me.)

Thank you for several chuckles at the end of a very trying & tiring day at work!

Great list--thanks!

". As the saying goes (I think)...don't let perfect get in the way of good."

It came from medicine I believe, .........( a client of mine )

" the enemy of very good is better"

Whatever! Too often way too true! He related as I told him he was neurotic, and then I had to share a story about how you NEVER try to shake those little crumbs from the bottom of a ready to bake graham cracker pie crust. Don't ask : )

omg.......... I do believe I am # 52

Do I get a t shirt? I'd really rather have a Mercedes. I "just" think I deserve it: )

Oh, The graham cracker PIE crust story......

A friend of mine sets out to bake an easy cheesecake, Gets annoyed by the little crumbs. Brushes them out into sink....ALONG with the entire crust, which slips effortlessly from its pan, into her sink.

"Do Not Try This At Home.Ever.

So.........I am a better person, smarter, more careful. My brush technique is far better.....I will NOT have that stupid ass result

Yes, Virginia, you will have exactly that same stupid result, and you will be in the car at 11:00 pm, to the all night open mega grocery, for a new crust, you IDIOT.

( the year was 1979. Some things, you REMEMBER)

And you left one out, architectrunnerguy. Perhaps because of redundancy.....

"I would need to see a floor plan and before you do anything, change all your lighting to 4000k "

Okay, thanks for the laffs : ) I think I'm #35 too . Now I REALLY want a small token ....

And this is why I keep saying you need to write a book, Jan.

Do I get a t shirt? I'd really rather have a Mercedes. I "just" think I deserve it: )

Ok, here you go @JAN MOYER. Another painting suitable for framing with a Mercedes AND clouds (tiny house just designed last week that had no room for a garage but surface parking IS allowed in the setback so I DID draw in a Mercedes).

In a few short days we've gone from a T-shirt to a Mercedes. Looks like @Jilly should have held out for more....lol....

If you don't ask? Nothing really happens .

@#$& !!

*kicks toe in dirt*

I better start thinking up a Mercedes-worthy quote for next year.

(I’d rather have you build me a house!)

My renderings have the clouds of smoke coming from the 36 year old Mercedes exhaust.

Where's the hood ornament?

Where's the hood ornament?

@Diana Bier Interiors, LLC I drew the rear of the car. Had to look it up to see what one looked like....lol....

Hahaha!

Love your drawings!

This may be my favorite Houzz thing.

Thanks for this. Lots of these made me smile. But the one that resonated the most was number 22, since it goes to my biggest pet peeve on this forum. Too bad the vast majority of posters looking for advice will never read this.

I'll work hard to try and get one of my comments on next year's list :-)