Great ideas, everyone! Pbrisjar, they wanted to have a BBQ at home too. Now they think it is at their daughter's house. She thinks they will freak out at the cost and they do not intend to tell them. She is letting them think that until a couple days before. They are not fancy, have buried both sets of parents and have more than they need. She's always trying to give stuff away (nieces, nephews, kids, etc.) She is my mother's daughter - "everything should be put to good use." They have a modest home in Mexico and modest home here. When they aren't in Mexico or here, they live on a boat in Canada. They would think flowers were a big waste of money. LOL! A cake may be nice because we all could enjoy but I'm hesitant to ask the restaurant to serve the cake. It's the kids' party and I don't want to seem like I'm taking over, YKWIM? If it was going to be at someone's house, I'd do a cake in a heartbeat. Great idea. As for this couple, they still drive the Toyota they bought (used) when the kids were young (it's immaculate). You could say they live life to the fullest, between their camper and boat, and two *very* modest homes. My sister cuts her hair every three months, so when she cuts it, she cuts it very, very short. :+" My sister thinks my house is fancy and it's always a work in progress. LOL!

We got two gifts in total. A vacuum cleaner and a pressure cooker. Both most welcome and the pc is still in use. No ’shower’ and only 8 wedding guests. Just parents, siblings and their spouses. DD got married during covid with the permitted 6 guests but a year later we had a party with 100 guests. They requested no gifts, just donations to two charities. The Italian side of the family found this diffcult to grasp and gave a lot of knickknacks they neither want nor need.

yes, they can inscribe a watch. Sic your brother on the task of looking at the watches she's got, bcs people sometimes have strong preferences about: -style of numbers (some people really want every little number on there; some hate Roman numerals, others like them; some people are OK w/ tic marks only, and some are OK w/ no number, or only the big 4--12,3,6,9) -second hand, or no second hand? -shape of face (though people don't have as strong a preference as they do for stuff like second hands, numbers, etc.) Then he'll really be involved in the gift. 25th anniversary is silver; I'm not sure how easy it is to get a sterling-silver or silver-plated watch. And that's anothe area in which people have strong preferences--some people only like gold tones, others prefer silver; others don't care. He should look in her jewelry box (or better yet, on her wrist & neck & ears, bcs sometimes people HAVE stuff but don't WEAR it), and see if she has a preference. It'd be a shame to buy her a watch she never wears.

A candle holder with flowers on it?????? A bookmark with pressed flowers..... or a small photo album of your marriage and life with pressed flowers........ As an Italiian on weddings we always give out candied covered almonds which is sort of a fruit.... but another tradition is to give out bundles of date candies....... a date stuffed with an almond...... is this the kind of stuff you were looking for.....???? .......