Well, there was the time that I was rushed in the morning, grabbed everything I needed and hurried outside to get in the car. It was when I put my seatbelt around me that I realized I had forgotten to put on my blouse.

( have an electric massager that is about 15 inches long that I wanted to use on my face for my bells palsy. It has a elbow bend in it and I wanted to straighten it out. I tried and tried and I didn't want to break it. I asked DH if he could do it, but don't break it I said. There are 2 round discs on the sides by the elbow and I thought they were for decoration. He pressed them and It straightened out. I thought DUHHHHHHHHHHHH. Boy did I feel stupid.

OK, no one else asked so I have to "Dawn, what happened to the lenses in your glasses?" Why were the lenses missing from your glasses?

I have almost left the house with my house shoes on so I have an emergency pair of shoes in my truck, just in case! HA!

The old joke in our family was the time Mom was rushing to get to work and used spray deodorant on her hair and hair spray on her armpits.

I do remember rushing to work, getting in the car and not being able to remember if I shaved both pits or just one.

I am *always* looking for my glasses as I refuse to get bifocals and I need to take them off for close work. I have found them on top of my head or around my neck. And I've lost them when I haven't moved from the sofa. It's a curse from my mother who was *always* looking for her glasses. I need to get lojack for them!

lol Weeeeell.......I have my moments too. lol Cute Dawn.

arkansas girl, I put them (cheap cheaters so not the most well made glasses) in my jacket pocket and the lens fell out while they were in there. Only one lens fell out, so I had one side that functioned as it should and the other side with an open space.

You guys are cracking me up which is a great way to start the day!

A few weeks ago I was at work and my computer wasn't working. I checked everything (I thought)... finally called our IT guy who came in, looked at it for a few seconds, then hit the Power button. I hadn't turned it on.

I was at a meeting a few years ago, looked down and noticed that I had two different shoes on! I should have realized this earlier in the day, since one shoe "tapped" as I walked and the other didn't. I began to panic one day when I tried putting my winter boots on and thought that my feet at swollen to the point that they didn't fit. I had forgotten that my sister, much smaller than me, had bought the identical type and I was trying to wear her pair!

Does opening the refrigerator to get something out of the microwave count?

Rusty

Well, I opened the oven to get something out of the fridge and really hoped that no one saw me doing that. There wasn't even anything in the oven.

Being seated at a restaurant, I accidentally bumped someone on the shoulder. Turned saying I was sorry and it was ME in the wall mirror. duh

Those darn tv remotes look just like our wireless phone. I was in a hurry and picked up the remote to call someone, punched in the numbers, and then didn't know why it wasn't ringing! Had a good laugh over that one!

LOL, foggy! One time at work I was trying to make a phone call and became frustrated because the call wouldnt go thru. It took me dialing a few times before I realized I was punching out the phone number on the keypad of the calculator that was on my desk!

Haha, Glenda - I once said excuse me to a lamppost after bumping into it!

We all sure have had some funny ditzy moments!

Dawn, just nanoseconds before I read your post I was thinking of all the times I whaled on the keypad on my adding machine only to realize I was trying to do it on the phone!

Recently, I couldn't get my cell phone to get any signal whatsoever. I was in an area that should have had absolutely good signal, but nothing, no way. I messed with all settings and I did everything I could think of and I couldn't get it to do anything. There was a Verizon store nearby so I stopped in. She turned it off and turned it back on. For real?

Walking around with my phone in my bra when I had no purse or pockets, and then spending hours retracing my steps trying to find my phone, only to find it later when it rang.

I (automatically) say "Thank You" to Siri, can't help myself.

You guys are so funny. I am LOL for sure!

These are good ones! I came here for a laugh, but found myself relating to more than one of these stories ;-) . I have put refrigerated items away in the pantry more times than I can count. And, yes, I wore my pants inside out to the gym once. Finding my glasses? Don’t even get me stared on that one. But the one that sticks out is when I forgot to pick my son up from daycare. I won’t tell him about that time.

My mother and father-in -laws had a His and Hers electric blanket. They loved letting the bedroom get cool on winter nights and snuggling under the heated blanket. MIL liked it a bit warmer than FIL. One evening, MIL was in a hurry and did not notice she had switched sides with the controllers. That night, they climbed into bed and FIL thought his side a bit warm so turned his controller down a notch. MIL, feeling a bit chilly increases her controller. You see where this is going. After an hour, both complained about something was wrong with the blanket. It was only after comparing the nature of the failures, that they realized the controllers had been interchanged.

Several years ago we were all running around crazy trying to get ready for a nieces wedding. I put on one white sandal and one black one with the intention of asking my daughter which one she thought looked better. Of course I forgot to ask her and went to the wedding with 2 different sandals on.

Didn't notice til almost 2 hours later! Everyone got a huge laugh out of it. The bride had the photographer take a pic of my feet!

These ditzy stories just keep getting better and better!

Jemdandy, your story reminds me of something that happened to my friend's mother. The remote that controlled her ceiling fan stopped working so she asked her son to check it out. He went into her bedroom and started playing around with the remote but couldn't figure out what was wrong with it either.

A short time later an ambulance and a couple of fire trucks tore into her driveway with sirens screaming. The emergency people jumped out of their vehicles and ran up to her door ready to deal with whatever emergency awaited.

Turns out the "remote" that the son was playing with was his mother's medical alert thingy.

LOL at ladypat1.

I reached up and tried to swipe my desktop screen. And was confused when it didn't do anything, so I did it again? In my defense, shortly before, I was using a desktop with touchscreen. I wish I did have a touchscreen desktop monitor.

I'm not used to a cell phone. Have only had it less that a year and am in constant fear of losing it. One day I was talking to a friend in Texas and she mentioned cell phone and I started looking frantically all around where I was seated, trying to find mine. After a few panicky moments I located it -- in my hand, pressed to my ear.

Got home really late one night, and I hit the key fob to lock the car.

Walked up to the door and hit the key fob button to unlock the door to the house. It didn't unlock. I hit it again and again, before I realized.... I don't have a key fob that unlocks the door to the house.

I play solitaire on my tablet. When it completes a row it sweeps them off to the side. I repeatedly move my hand out of the way as the cards are sweeping under it.

I go between reading books and reading on my kindle. Hate it when I tap my book trying to turn the page. Only works on the kindle!

Rob, I too try to swipe my computer. Use my pad a lot.

I just could NOT figure out why it wouldn't work. Um, because you're an idiot Robin, that's why (giggle!)

My ditz moments have been when I almost left the house wearing my cozy Ugg house shoes. Not once but several times have I done this. I get as far as the door to the garage, and when I step down I notice it and have to go back and change.

These have been fun to read.

DH was having a ditzy day. He's a bit out of it as he had a fall down a poorly lidded manhole on a job site and cracked a rib so he's much clumsier than usual anyway. Four other workers had to lift him up out of the manhole since he couldn't get up himself.

He was fixing the small excavator in our driveway, got oil on his shoes and then forgot to take them off. He tracked the oil up the carpeted stairs. Then he got out our carpet cleaner and wouldn't allow me to do it, instead he cleaned it himself.

He said he was fine with no pain the whole time. Of course at the very end he stepped off of what he thought was the last step and went down two steps into the wall. We now have a broken light switch and a nice hole in the wall. I should have insisted but he gets extremely stubborn sometimes. Next time I think he'll listen though... I hope!

We did find out that this lovely house's studs are too far apart for an outside support wall. :-(.

Gosh, yeonasky, that's awful! I hope he's ok. Rib issues are awful.

That reminds me of the time my elderly dad fell down the basement steps. He had been having issues with his leg giving out. There was head shaped hole in the wall at the bottom. It was wood paneling.

Tapping the book reminds of the time my lost flip phone was found by friends like three or four years later (in a van they were cleaning to put up for sale). I hated my new phone I had to get after the flip was lost, you had to tap and swipe the screen for everything.

Anyway took the flip to the Sprint store to begin service on it. Suddenly I complained to the guy that it wasn't working! I couldn't see my contact list or any other list no matter how many times I tapped the screen....duh. You don't tap my flip, you press buttons, the old fashioned way. I was so embarrassed.

I have so enjoyed these ditzy stories - what a goofy bunch we are!

yeonassky, that sounds terrible. Your poor hubby. I think if I were him, I'd go to bed and hide for a few days until this run of clutzy bad luck is over. Rib pain is awful. I've just recently recovered from a rib injury myself and it is debilitating. Not only is it painful to cough, sneeze or laugh, pretty much any sort of movement hurts as well. Not good for a guy who is in the construction trade. Hope he feels better soon.

That must have been scary for your dad as well, aok.

I use my iPad almost exclusively. I was reading a magazine one day and used two fingers to try to enlarge a picture for better viewing.

I've been driving a push button start car for a year. I recently drove a car that needed a key to start. Even though I put the key in the ignition, I pushed a spot on the dash to start it...an empty spot with no button...muscle memory.

We once lived in a house that had a pen for the dogs in the backyard. The yard had drainage problems, so hubby took the entire pen down so that he could move some dirt around with a tractor and install a french drain. He left the gate standing alone in it's original spot.

One night, he went out to feed the dogs. They waited patiently as he opened the gate; he stepped thru and the dogs followed him thru the gate single file and over to their food bowls and he closed the gate behind him. He fed them and returned to the house stopping to go thru the gate and latch it first...

Schoolhouse, your story reminds me of one. DH bought a used Miata MX-5 a couple of years ago from a friend’s neighbor. It’s a 2-seater hardtop convertible, a fun little car, so not that big. He was inspecting it after getting it home. It was very clean, but of course he had to do a thorough inspection of everything, and put his stuff in it. He started finding little odds and ends under the seats. One was a black iPad with a black cover! He called the guy and he was amazed. Said he lost it about 3 years ago and never could find it. I guess it slipped down behind and under the seat and he never looked thoroughly.

Fun2behere reminded me of one from long ago. I had a car without electric windows. A friend got in, searched around, and was totally bewildered as to how to open the window. I pointed to the crank handle on the door. She was old enough to have had many cars with manual windows.

Today was my ditzy day! I pressed the lock button in the door knob, stepped out and closed the door. I jammed by hand into my pant's pocket to pull out my car key, and then realized that I did not have my house keys! I was locked out. - Ditz #1- I was on my way to an appointment with my broker and thought to myself. I'll figure out something in the meantime. If worse comes to worse, I break into my house. I did that once 50 yrs ago - broke out a casement window to the basement and dropped down to the basement floor. (I was much younger and agile back then. I did not relish the thought of repeating that act.) I went to my car parked in the driveway, and thumbed the remote key fob - Nothing. What now? Did I have the right key in my hand? Yes, but now what. My car battery was dead. I had left the rear overhead light on after removing groceries from the hatch two days ago. -Ditz #2 -

Since my broker was only 3 blocks away, I hurriedly walked there. Upon arrival to his office, I realized that I was not wearing my hearing aids. - Ditz #3 -

I completed the appointment and walked home. By that time, it was 2:30 pm. My wife would be back at 3:30 pm so I sat in the car and waited. I had plenty of time to think about my 3 ditzes; It was humbling.

As soon as the wife got home (and finished laughing), she opened the house and I connected the charger to my battery. We then recalled, wasn't it last year when we decided it would be a good idea where to hide a house key outside, but never did? We could not think of a good hiding place that was not obvious to thiefs. Every hiding place that was readily accessible was a bad one.

I had a brand new dryer and put a load of clothes in and pushed the button - wouldn't come on. Tried several times. Got myself in a huff and about to call the Maytag # on the sticker to complain and then realized I hadn't closed the dryer door.

The other day dh put a bag of chips in the fridge. I thought maybe he wanted cold chips but he had no clue why he put them there.

I've come back to a sopping wet dryer full of clothes before.....because after loading the dryer, I walked away without hitting "start." :-/

This happens more than I would care to admit too.

Thank you all so much for sharing these events. I thought I was alone in my ditziness.

All. The. Time. Yesterday, I lost my navy laundry bag. I have a few and the colors represent what is in the bag. I keep all of the bags at the bottom of my closet and sort the laundry into the appropriate bag. Last night I went to put a dark item in my navy bag, and it was missing.

I looked in all the logical places.

After looking everywhere three times, I found it. It was in my DH's closet behind his shirts.

I think that as I was hanging his jogging pants, the bag was stuck to one of the pants. Then, it fell and slipped behind the bottom rack of shirts. (Yes, static cling)

Okay so phew.....it was in a logical place....but.....why didn't I notice the laundry bag clinging to the pants. I walked from the bed, where I fold the clothes to the closet where I take a hanger and then hang the garment.

Gray, if you are 60 or over you are not alone. I don't remember these things happening in my 50's.

share_oh If you keep your chips in the refrigerator they stay crispier.

eld, look at it this way, we have 60 plus years of information in our brains to process.

Jemdandy, how about installing a keypad on your garage door or front door? My kids never needed a key growing up, just went through the garage.

The only issue for the garage door could be if there was a power outage. We always had a few neighbors who had keys. So, are there any neighbors who could hold an emergency set?

We have a spare house key in an obscure place on our property. Our ditz moment is forgetting to put it back where it belongs.

Thank you everyone. DH is much better. Lucky for us we only have a wall to fix. No further body bruising or breaking was involved in the hole in the wall episode.

My ditzy moment was leaving my purse at home with the attendant ID including my driver's license one day last month. I tried to reach my son all day to send me a picture of it. But no go. We are in the Bermuda triangle of cell phone reception here at times. Grrr. Luckily nobody stopped me for anything. Not that they usually do but you never know and you're supposed to have your driver's license with you when they do or even when they don't!

I have the electronic ignition/push button start on the car I drive for work. I hate that car. I was sitting the in car a few weeks ago pushing the button over and over because it wouldn't start. I'm just thinking how much I hate this piece of crap car and just as I am getting out, I realize I've been pushing the button to turn on the AC. Hit the ignition button and it started right up.