I never understood why people think they have to open the door if someone knocks. If she sees you in the future you can say you were napping. Or if you want to visit with her for 15 minutes, at that time you simply thank her for coming over and stand up. It is a rare person who will not stand when you do.

Please just say that you are extremely tired after your hospital procedures, and really need your sleep, frequently and at unpredictable hours. Thank her for her concern, but shut the door... This can be direct, and if explained, if it hurts her feelings, she really doesn't have enough feelings for others that you should worry about it.

I too would simply thank her for her concern tell her you are resting and ask her to come back at a certain time tomorrow. If you wish to explain further you could say when you generally get more tired. . That's assuming you wish to visit with her at all.

I would definitely ask her back if it were me because I enjoy having visitors to break up the day if I can time wise.

Or you can just tell her that visiting tires you out and while you appreciate her concern, visits longer than 15 minutes (or whatever) are more than you can handle and would she mind being excused :-) And maybe tell her a good time when you do feel upto a visit. That way you can plan your naptimes to be undisturbed.

Let's say she arrives at noon and you want to limit the visits to 15 minutes. You could tell when she arrives how nice it is of her to visitl but that in 15 minutes you have to rest/nap per doctors orders. When 15 minutes is over, stand up, thank her for the visit, tell her it's time for your nap and walk her to the door.

Do this every time and hopefully she'll get the message and figure it out for herself.

I've been discussing this with my SIL who is having surgery today. She is somewhat private, but her husband even more so and he'll be there 'standing guard', or I will.

I found myself glued into a chair with a book facing the door to my mothers hospital room once. She was medicated, queasy, and I kept waving away ladies from her church and social groups who thought they were doing her a favor by coming to entertain her. She needed to rest.

I think you could tell the neighbor comfortably that you've found you are over extending yourself and you need more rest, or that your doctor has told you to get more rest so as not to slow your recovery. And that you'll be up to her visits at a later date, but now you must follow what your body and your doctor are telling you, and nap quietly.

Be well soon, and take care of yourself....

Perhaps you could put a sign on your door, “Resting, please do not disturb” at times when you don’t want visitors.

You must be an awesome person to have people care about you like they do !

I would just tell her. You never know, she might be relieved. Perhaps she (incorrectly) assumes you're lonely and looking for company, so she stays for a long time.

This is actually a good problem to have.

I agree that there is nothing wrong in explaining that you are exhausted and need to rest.

I was told that for very hour of anesthesia, it takes one week to recover. I found this true when I had surgery. If an unexpected neighbor came by, I would visit while lying down on my sofa.

Do what is right for you.

I wouldn't answer the door.

The problem with not answering the door is that she may then assume that something is seriously wrong and you can't get to the door. And then who knows what could happen - she could call the police to do a 'welfare check' or even break in herself!!

I am perfectly fit and healthy but often turn my phone off as the texting tones drives my dog nuts....and I forget about it :-) And I am not one to live with their cell phone attached to their hand at all times so often find multiple texts and voice mails from my sister who is panicking because she can't reach me!! She is sure that I have been murdered in my sleep :-) LOL!!

In this case, colleen's suggestion of a note on the door makes a lot of sense!

The problem with not answering the door in such a situation is that the visitor may decide to worry, and come checking back again and again. I would absolutely open the door, explain that you have to have your rest....maybe in a few days you'll be up for short visits.

A sign on the door may be just the thing for a very persistent person.

I was also going to say put a note on the door and take your nap.

I have had to explain the necessity of rest and not waking a sleeping or sedated patient (for patients in ICU, no less!) to casual visitors many, many times (Casual visitors who ignore the sign that says, "IMMEDIATE FAMILY ONLY". ) More than once the visitor would exclaim "But I drove an hour to get here!"

Just politely tell the visitor that you are very tired and really not up to having the number of visitors that you have been, you have found that you are overdoing it, but you do appreciate her thoughtfulness and are sure she will understand. And be firm if she pushes back.

Most people don't stay long, if they come in. Often it's a chat at the door. The one that has adopted me, tries to be helpful, for instance if I am stripping the bed, she helps me make it, and even gets the wash started. She's tended to my neglected houseplants, and dusted my bookshelves, not unlike what I think a daughter would do.

You are very fortunate to have someone who wants to chip in like that. Im sure that she feels that she is being useful. If you don’t want it, there are many great suggestions in this thread. Some might think that she would be a godsend but I understand if it is not for you. My best wishes as you recover.

Adopt her?

Plus I agree with Susieq.

Wishing you quick healing!