I agree that while the steps going off in all directions look great, they are extravagant. The porch is not big enough to do much more than be a landing, and a nice one I wouldn't want to do without. Since there are only 4 steps, consider dropping down to a patio that can handle all the activities you're interested in having. You might could eliminate a step by raising the patio slightly. A kneewall and a cheekwall could add a bit of overflow seating.

A grass patio isn't fun to use when it's wet, you have to move furniture to mow (as stated above), and god help you if you have a fidgeter (I would have a bare spot under my seat in about three hours). Of all the gravels I like the look of pea gravel the best. If you do an inch or so of pea gravel over a compacted base of 21a/ABC/crusher run, it's very solid and walkable, but it's still a rounded stone. The more use the patio sees, the more it'll migrate. As Yard mentioned above, an angular stone stays put better. Here we used #8 chip gravel at a VERY busy winery (lots of foot traffic) and there's very little migration into the beds or lawn areas. In your circumstance, I'd build the patio on a base of 6 inches compacted crusher run, then an inch of your decorative aggregate. An advantage of this is that down the road if budget allows, the decorative aggregate and a little of the crusher run can be scraped off and the patio converted to dry-laid flagstone. That's how we did our patio, because our 100 year old home still needs a new kitchen and a new downstairs bathroom and a new boiler and... yeah don't buy old homes unless you're independently wealthy. Anyhow that's my .02

Nice space. In a similar pickle. Some suggestions. Declutter. Remove the swing. Update. Close in the ceiling and integrate lighting, fan, etc. Clean. Stain your deck.

I would replace the stairs with a landing and stairs. Cut a terrace or two into the slope with a curving path to the stairs. Add shrubs, hosta, ground cover and other shade tolerant plants.