We bought our land 4 years before we built our home. We wanted to build our dream home and were not in a hurry to rush into it and then regret decisions made too quickly. I was the designer on the project and honestly enjoyed all that it entailed. We also had a wonderful builder that made the whole process go seamlessly and stress free. After we chose a house plan and had it updated to include the must-haves on our list, I poured over those plans for hours and hours making sure each room was as ideal as possible. Now is the time to decide if you want an HVAC duct in that place or a light switch or outlet in that spot. Decide if you want floor outlets, special outlets in pantries or cleaning closets. Are the rooms the right size? Could a couple feet make a difference anywhere? I sure wish we had made our laundry room 3 feet wider. Choose as many products as you can before your builder gives you his estimate. If you want granite and he's giving you laminate pricing the cost will be more. Also, painting the interior all one color is less expensive than having several rooms painted differently. Are you going with pre-painted siding or having the exterior custom painted? Are you using brick, cultured stone or natural stone? Huge difference between brick and natural stone. Plumbing fixtures vary in price as do lighting and appliances. Make sure he's taking your choices into account with his bottom line. Think about any upgrades in insulation, soundproofing, radiant heating, etc. The best advice I can give from someone who's been there, done that, is to sit down and really think about how you want the house to look, function and feel....and cost. Are there things you can't do without? For us it was a 3rd garage, his & hers master's closets, a computer space off the kitchen area where we can monitor our son, and a particular type of kitchen layout. Break the house plan down room by room if it's overwhelming but KNOW WHAT YOU WANT. If you're unsure of that then you can be talked into a lot of stuff you will find out later you really didn't need or want. Almost all of us have to stick to a budget so the trick is getting what you want overall at a price you can afford. This website is a treasure trove of information that I'm sure will benefit you in the days to come. Good luck on your build and keep your chin up.

Check the colors against your furniture and such. If you are starting with the walls first then I suggest you do like I did. After painting my 25"walls by myself, yeah really scary up there, I did the following: We purchased a rug that had all our favorite colors and put it in our family room as the anchor. I went to store and picked one of those pallet cards that gives a group of colors that go together. Mine are the Biltmore Estate colors. All my favorites are there with even a few I would never have thought of. And it turns out all the colors in the pallet are actually in the rug we got. It took a few months before we realized that there were colonial blue areas in the rug that actually matched the blue we used in one room. I used the neutral tan for my entry and stairwell, used a lighter version of the tan for my kitchen, family and hallways. I used the red in my livingroom, hunter green in dining and the blue in my upstairs bonus room. I just did my guest bath using the same blue in the rug andthe bonus room and it is actually my unexpected color in the house. It matches all the other colors but you would never really think to see it. But together they all match really well. I carry my colors in my purse and use them all the time when I am out and about and tempted to get something for the house. So pick that tan and find a pallet that goes with it, it really helped me a lot.

There's a pressure cooker of change coming. You have some battle fatigue, and additional stressors of moving your Mom and her pets. Not to mention the change in working conditions, the actual work of moving, and leaving what you have known, and are comforted by, for 33 years. And, you are now feeling guilty because you have the good fortune to move, work remotely, be near your kids / grandkids, bring your mom, have a beautiful new home, etc. Lighten up on YOURSELF and give yourself TIME. No one is perfect. Drop the guilt, and just realize that you are doing the best you can. And after while, after this all dies down, you'll sit, you'll relax and you'll just "be" home.

We stay in a very old hotel in Rome that has cararra marble everywhere in the bathroom and it has been there since 1947 there is no discoloration anywhere, not in the shower or the walls so maybe check with Italy they have been using this stone for a very long time.