This is a thought provoking and valuable thread. Although I highly doubt we'll be in this house when all of our landscaping has reached full maturity, we did plan things for the future. All of the trees were planted taking into consideration their ultimate size and suitability for where they were planted. Perennials and shrubs are mostly in their places now and should be happy for decades. Our hardscaping work has been built to last. Our house was built in 1938 and has seen landscaping come and go. By the time we bought it though, it was so neglected (and paved over) that we had to raze everything to bare dirt. The only shade that existed was that thrown by the house. Beds that are in full sun now will eventually be left to part sun/full shade as the trees mature. Right now, our irrigation system is designed to support maximum happiness in full sun conditions. But we use minimal water to support my habit. It's a series of drip lines and directional sprinklers that can be moved around as things progress and extablish. This elaborate system requires maintenance right now, but eventually only a small amount of our space will require them at all. I can expect several more years of experimentation until my sun/shade patterns are finally set. By then, it will probably be time to hand over the shovel to the next owner. I can tell you this though, our next (and probably last) home will have all the bones in place. At my age, I never ever ever want to undertake a project like this again. If you hear me say otherwise, feel free to slap me until I come to my senses. Steven

Chinacat..."it's not the smoke, it's the slacker who's abusing it. the prayer goes 'blessed art thou who has sanctified us by thy commandments, and given us the herb of the fields' by the way... and 'treat your body as a temple' applies just as much to things like white sugar and Pringles as it does to anything else..." You said it. I do know productive members of society who smoke, and I know others who abuse their bodies with food, abuse their minds with television. It's not the guns killing people, it's the people killing people. That said, perhaps that is his one vice? If he works as hard as she says he does, he must need some time to relax. Also, is he a homeowner? I thought it was the OP's house. If it is, then expecting him to contribute and feel equal may be difficult. Have you tried interesting him in exercise? That gives a great natural high. Does he have hobbies you could share? If you're really not interested in being with him because he smokes, yet you knew he smoked, did not ever own a home, etc... prior to getting married, you set yourself up for failure. Don't blame him for your inability to change him. You married a bachelor who has the social and homemaking skills of a college student (no offense to college students!) He doesn't want to grow up. You already have. Invite him to grow up with you, or get out. You deserve more, and your kids deserve more. By the way, don't ever assume kids don't know what's going on. They will find out sooner or later, and you will have to reconcile the "don't do as I do (or DH does) but do as I say" and we know that never works. I'm sorry, but you said to be frank. I mean no judgement. Best of luck to you.

I like my Giallo for exactly the same reason that lalitha did not like her ST Cecilia. I love how dirt and crumbs do not show and if I miss something, who cares? I do sometimes rub my hand over the counter. If I had to do it over though, I would pick a different color granite. I was rushed by DH and the granite people. They assured me with "Everything goes with white!" (Meaning my white cabinets) I finished my kitchen in 09 and I have to say that I am not tired of it. Although the counter has movement, the BS is very simple. I think you have to know what kind of person YOU are. For me, if I really love something when I buy it, I will always love it. I can become accepting of things that were maybe a mistake, but I will never come to love them. Ten years is when things can start to look dated. The interior design industry makes sure that there will always be that one new trend. Look around your house. Have you always like bright and bold? Or do you like subdued? Do you constantly change your style. Go with a granite that matches your decorating style and you will not tire of it too quickly.

Hi all, Thanks for the replies! I went to order the darker hex and lo and behold it’s out of stock across the country till late February. Start date is January. So bummed! Ordered a sample of the lighter stuff but not feeling crazy about it. I had my heart set on hex, but should I just do a dark gray rectangle tile? As for the vanity, yes it is not my first choice. I have looked at everything out there including pedestals. I am picky! I was about to have one custom made, but thought this is a bathroom, how much do I want to spend on a room I spend the least amount of time in? So, now I’m just not sure.