Sounds like you are rebelling, in a way. But you're an adult, you can do that. I find I'm turning more and more into my parents, especially my Mom, every day. Some good ways, some bad.

I don't see it as rebelling. I certainly don't live the way I do to spite them or disappoint them. I just think it's important to let some things go that don't matter instead of doing things to only make someone else proud.

Although you may be right. I remember thinking how ridiculous some of their quirks were when I was little,and dreaming of the day when I was able to walk through the door of my own home without being nagged about something......

I'm somewhere in the middle. We never had pets growing up, it was always blamed on my step-sister being allergic. I think it was because they couldn't be bothered. DH and I have had at least one dog since 1988, although since the last one died last year, we are pet-less.

I don't really make beds. Some days I pull the sheet and comforter up neatly, other days it stays rumpled. Neither of us care. I'm a lazy housekeeper, married to Messy Marvin. We aren't tripping over things, but there is clutter. If it gets too much, one of us will tidy up. As a kid, your room had better be picked up and the bed made before you left for school, or else! And every Saturday, the whole house was cleaned and vacuumed. I am more inclined to clean as it needs it.

I know that my (step) mom had a lot going on, with six of us in the house. There had to be some rules or chaos would reign. I saw that a bit in their later years, when the kids were gone and they only did what they decided was necessary.

MTA after reading comments: I always jokingly said that not making beds was my rebellion against my childhood. :)

The same values?? You bet! The same priorities?? Maybe not so much :-) And not all the same habits either.

My parents were very social. I am not. My mother saved everything - string, magazines, any plastic or glass container that was the slightest bit usable, wrapping paper, ribbons, "gently used" tin foil and paper napkins(!!). I recycle everything I possible can. She also saved the smallest bit of leftover anything, wrapped in foil and stuck it in the freezer. It never got eaten and her freezer was chock full of nameless little foil packages of who knows what :-) Any leftovers that don't get eaten in a day or two at my house get tossed.

But they loved animals - mom raised Scotties and Yorkies and I always had numerous pets growing up. I still do. They were both avid gardeners and I inherited that love and their skill and experience and made it my life's work. They both had a strong social conscience and volunteered time at various causes. I do also.

So in many ways not so different at all. And it scares the daylights out of me to now see my mom staring back at me when I look in the bathroom mirror! How did that happen??

I am my mother and father with a little bit of MIL thrown in. Clean, tidy and organized home. Growing up I had no set chores and did no housework. I did make my bed and hung up clothes, essentially kept my room organized. I did help with household tasks like dusting and setting the table.

Gardengal,I am anti leftover myself. We used to have a whole meal of leftovers every week at my parents house...ick. If SO doesn't eat them the next day(I don't eat them at all,save leftover homemade pizza) they are dog food.

I am not entirely anti-leftover - and that's a good thing since I am a single person and cooking for one is hard - but I have my limits :-) I actually like and will eat most leftover veggies but casseroles and soups and even meats - maybe two meals max and that's it!! Meat loaf and roast chicken are an exception - both make great sandwiches and leftover chicken always gets eaten....or frozen to use in another dish.

If I decide I want to make stew or a casserole or soup, I share with my sister. She is single and not big on leftovers either. Between the two of us, we manage to avoid most.

I was Daddy's little girl, my mother and older sister (13 years older) always stuck together. My dad died of cancer when I was 12. We lived in a double house, my sister and her husband (later kids) on one side, my mother, brother (he is 10 years older, so moved out soon ) and I on the other. Let's just say to have two controlling "mothers" did not go over well. So I am a different mother Growing up my 2 daughter's only job was to do their best at school, they did not have to worry about working to get a car, clothes and such. We did not pick their friends or forbit who they could see. Both of them turned out very well .We have a great relationship and they know they can come to us with whatever bothers them.

Interesting question. Some surface things are different, like the fact that I grew up in an apartment in NYC and now live in an old farmhouse on a dirt road--and that apartment was always neat and clean, and my farmhouse (which has only 20% of the apartment's closets) is not.

But as a grownup I've enjoyed many of the things my parents did--cooking, photography, music, reading, being creative in various ways. Even though my mother died when I was 9, I think I'm like both of them.

I'm a hell of a lot like both of my parents.

Watchmelol,luckily once I WAS out on my own my parents respected my lifestyle choices even though they expressed disapproval. As the youngest of 6 though, I am doomed to forever be a baby in the eyes of my siblings. I still get "advice" (unasked for) in the form of condescending comments delivered with a shake of the head. For example,my sisters husband is a contractor. When I bought my first home,I asked him to come fence in a portion of the acreage for my dogs and do a few other repairs.He ended up charging me 1200 bucks more than his estimate. When I asked why, my sister said "(sigh) This is homeownership amy. Maybe you weren't ready for it." When I was discussing the other repairs,I kept getting eye rolls and advice from her and other siblings,as I had the conversation with him at a family gathering. Another example,one of the bathtubs in the house was one of those one piece shower/tub deals. The little metal bar was missing, leaving 2 holes for water to get in behind it. I asked him to fix it. Immediately, i hear from all sides "why?" "Don't you have 2 other full bathrooms you can use?" "You just want to throw money away." The sister whose husband was doing the work actually asked me what i was planning to use that bathroom for to which i answered "oh,you know, dismembering the bodies." Everything I asked for was met with resistance. "Why do need that NOW?" "Thats not important amy." Finally BIL had to step in and tell all of them that they were jepardizing a business opportunity for him and to knock it off. Then when I asked about the HUGE difference in the bill vs the estimate I got an "I told you so." Never mind that the bill got paid in full.( More than half before the job was even done at the insistence if my sister, since they were in a bind and needed it)

It also amazes me to observe the differences in all of us siblings,raised in the same household. Other than the fact that all of them seem to like to gang up on me with their all knowing wisdom,I don't think that 2 of us are really alike at all,personality or lifestyle wise.

My oldest brother is on his third marriage, is somewhat reclusive and to me,overly sensitive. But very sweet. He tends to be taken advantage of,hence the introversion.

Next brother,everyone loves. He is funny and charming. But he is also very good at finding buttons.and pushing them.

Next brother, also funny,although in a dry sort if way,EXTREMELY intelligent, somewhat arrogant. I will say that THIS brother tends to leave me alone and only gives advice when asked for it,which I don't.

Oldest sister, completely changed after her marriage. Has fully embraced farm life and "redneck" culture. Extremely judgmental, disapproving, bossy and knows everything about everything. As far right as right can get. Loves to bring up politics and religion at every opportunity. Also loves to preach the evils of my life at me.But very responsible and reliable,and can put aside her opinions in a crisis.

Next sister, closest to me in age is sweet and sensitive and very social. She could be described as our family diplomat. Entirely impossible to stay mad at her. But she has a bit of know it all in her too,even though it rarely comes out. A very good sport and even LIKES being picked on (in a friendly way)

Me: Practically perfect in every way,if I do say so myself. ;-p (okay, even I rolled my eyes at that one)

I am admittedly rather selfish. I am not particularly social,I like to stay home just me,SO and the dogs,although i do very much enjoy meeting and talking with all kinds of people at my job.I'm impatient and can be very mean when provoked,and I have no remorse for it if I feel they asked for it. I have been accused of being a brat, usually when i bristle against the unwanted advice. I REALLY get riled up when they break out the phrase "you need to.....(insert whatever it is I NEED to do here") But i will do anything that I am able to help my family if I can.

a therapist dream here in this topic!

Lol. I actually didn't mean to drum up old parental issues, I just noticed a difference in what was important to them and what's important to me, and wondered if others felt the same way. I don't hold any grudges or anything, but sometimes my parents joke that the Catholic school education they paid for was a complete waste of money.......

I don't use Sear's catalog for toilet paper.

If I need to go outside at night, I don't light a lantern anymore.

When I was a kid, once a month we'd burn our excess paper and cardboard. I don't do that anymore.

I've parked my slide-rule and now use a pocket calculator.

I buy breads and do not bake any.

I flip on a light switch instead of lighting a pressurized fuel lamp.

I travel more often and much farther than when I was a child.

I rarely listen to radio for news, but once it was a daily event.

Child discipline was simple, and now its complicated. Community living is much more diverse than it once was.

When I was a child, we did not concern ourselves about shortages of natural resources, and now we realize that it is a real possibility.

I felt like I had a great childhood, my parents were wonderful people, I got very VERY lucky! I'm very much like my Mom, there are a few differences. They were very strict about going to church, I don't ever go to church. My parents house was really cluttered but I keep my house a lot neater though not OCD neat anymore. I once had a very OCD neat house, I think that was a lot of do with my EX husband though and less about me. I just want things realistically neat but like for instance, I have a lot of stuff on my dining room table right now like the sewing machine and am not worried about hurrying up and putting it away. When my sister came over, she was amazed at how neat my house was, I had to explain to her that I'd been cleaning for two weeks before they came for a visit...HAHA! OH and another difference is that my parents had a large family of five kids and lots of grand kids and great grand kids...I can never ever remember a time I wanted to have any kids at all! As far as I can remember back, I've always felt repelled to the idea of having children...don't know where that came from?

My morals and deep values are in tune with those of my parents. Treat everyone with respect, both to their face and behind their back. Live within your means. Don't waste even the cheap stuff. Think ahead: how will the consequence of your choices today affect you tomorrow, next year, next decade? Give to charity. Find a church that helps you "keep the faith." (All us kids attend a church denomination a few degrees more liberal than our childhood church. But that's because our childhood church took a conservative turn, and our parents stuck with it rather than move to a different building, not that they shared those exact conservative opinions.)

All that, plus the pure luck of being born white in our white-favoring country, and the further luck of not encountering medical catastrophe or natural disasters, is allowing us to live a little "larger" than my folks did. But still in accordance with their basic values.

Now if I could only re-create my Mom's iron discipline for housework. She had a weekly routine and our house was always spic & span. Mine, not so much.

Arkansas girl, I also had a wonderful childhood. My parents were just strict about certain things that are insignificant to me now. And as the baby of 6 and aunt of 15,I never ever ever ever wanted children either. The only babies around here are the furbaby kind. :)

My father tried to turn all of us into germaphobes like him but I choose not to be. My 2 brothers are to the point of obsession. He has so many weird quirks and I don't want to be like that at all. (Scheduled, timed naps?) It drives me crazy. I'm more like my mother, I think. I hope. She was always content and happy with the little things. Spontaneous. Happy to be home alone, just puttering around, not on the go all the time. My father has to have someplace to go all the time but then complains he doesn't get stuff done at home. Well duh. Stay home and stay awake!

I like a made bed but don't remember my mother caring if we made them or not. She never really gave us chores. As she got older, clutter became an issue for her. I don't like clutter at all so I try to keep mine down. I need to try harder, tho.

I'm the opposite of my mom in almost every way! I learned how not to parent from her, though I do believe she tried her best.

I'm like my grandma, both in looks and personality.

My mom was an obsessive worrier to the point that fear often kept her from enjoying life. I am not reckless or much of a risk taker, but I truly believe in living life to the fullest whether it's travel, new experiences or doing things out of my comfort zones. I don't want to look back and feel like I miss out on living because I was afraid to live.

I'm very much like my father in many ways, except for one. My dad was frugal to the point of denying himself things even though money wasn't an issue. One time we were out to dinner and he wanted a salad with his meal. The salad was $1.00 extra and he refused to order one because he didn't want to spend the money. I don't live beyond my means, but if I want something (whether it's something like a new pair of shoes or going out to a nice restaurant) and I can afford it, I allow myself to spend money on me.

Neither one of my parents were slobs, but they weren't particularly neat either. I find that as an adult, I like order in my surroundings so I put things away when I'm done with them, deal with the mail immediately, regularly clean out closets and drawers, etc.

My Mom was a "yeller". When I was a child, I remember wishing she would just spank me & be done with it. Guess what, I turned out to be a yeller too when my DD was little....sigh (hanging head in shame).

I think everyone is a patchwork result of their childhood family experiences. We all like to think that we favor what we liked and avoid what we disliked but I think in reality, while some of the patchwork is deliberate choice, other parts are subconsciously there from influence and exposure whether we want them or not.

I would hope to be as good a woman as my Mother was. I am sure my sister feels the same way.

Sue

I'll never be even half the wonderful woman that my Mom was. They just don't make them like that anymore!

I am the complete in every way opposite of my parents. I'm an only child who thought she was adopted. They wouldn't let me have any pets except a parakeet. I have had 15 cats and four dogs and parrots and other birds. Presently two dogs and three cats. They went to church every Sunday of their lives. I never go to church and did not raise my kids in the church like I was raised and forced into everything connected to the church. My parents were conservative Republicans. I am a flaming liberal Democrat. My parents lived in a small brick ranch house which they built. I live in a 180-year-old farmhouse. My parents had a manicured perfect yard with a manicured rose bush garden. I have a half acre of many old trees, ponds, bushes perennial gardens and a wildlife area. My parents never gave me a compliment in my life except once when my mother and I were in the living room when I was in my 50's and she said you have nice hair and I looked around to see who she was talking to. My parents never gave me any advice except children should be seen and not heard. I pushed my kids to be anything in the world they wanted and daughter could do anything son could. My mother's house was sparely tastefully decorated. Mine is overrun with antiques I've amassed over the years. My mother was an excellent cook. I am not. My mother was a wonderful housecleaner. I am not.

I'm sure I could come up with more but I have to walk the dogs.

ETA..While walking the dogs I came up with some more. Mother had a standing hairdresser appointment every Friday of her life and I haven't been to one in 35 years. She colored her hair. I do not. She'd have a bath every afternoon and "dress up" for my father. Never happened here. He ruled the house. Again never happened here.

The only good things I take away from my upbringing is I was raised on a very healthy diet, no snacks and very few sweets unless she baked a pie or cake. And they both liked the outdoors and while she wasn't a gym rat like me, she walked every day for a mile or two even up till 91. She still mowed her own yard at 90.

Early on my mother was a terrible cook. We ate @ the Country Club "all" the time. She sewed all my clothes. She was a FANTASTIC seamstress. We took a pattern making class together. I cook all our food from scratch tho and sincerely dislike ritzy, pretenious dinning. You know....ie: ice sculptures on the buffet. Dessert carts. Caviar. Rose carved radishes on my salad.

My mother was a cheerleader. She was very athletic. She could not boil water without burning it. Dad was a farmer that moved over into being a gardener. He learned to be a very good cook. I like to cook and sew like my grandmother. I like to garden. I am very, very unathletic (understatement). I could go on, but as Lily said, I have things to do.

ETA: She didn't ever compliment me either.

My mother was such a wonderful lady who had a rough life and poor financial means. She worked so hard right along the men in the fields, washed on a washboard after carrying water from the well and heated it in a bug black pot. Cooked and baked on a wood stove and had no electricity. She was so tiny and never complained about anyone or anybody. She was a fantastic cook and seamstress, using her old treadle machine. Bless her heart died from ALZ...and knew no one for the last several years of her life. She always said , " We don't have much, but what we do have, we need to take care of....and soap is cheap so always be clean." I have a lot of her traits and thankful for them.

My dad was so mean and abusive. I was so afraid of him that I would not do anything to make him angry. I never felt any love from him nor did I ever see him express it to anyone else. So all I ever learned for him was discipline! I certainly hope I do not have any of his characteristics..

My mother had a very rough life too...given away when she was 4 years old. She was very good to me when I was a child. I never considered her an animal lover....she could chop the head off of a chicken, but only later did I realize how much she knew about animals and the common sense she had about them. I know she wasn't allowed pets when she was growing up....although they had a barn cat named Bob. I had every kind of pet you can think of.

I had to go to church and I hated it, until I was a teenager and met my husband to be and he had to go to church too, and then I even went to Thursday night business meetings. I have been to church 3 times since I got married almost 52 years ago.

As my mother got older, she was very difficult...even mean. She was rude to some people and then wondered why they didn't want anything to do with her. However, she was very funny, when she wanted to be, and a lot of people used to like to go have coffee with her. Myself, I am more of a loner...mainly because I have very little free time and I would rather spend it doing something I want to do, and that seldom includes being around other people. Sometimes. But not always.

I look like my mother and I am like her in that I am very healthy and I feel sort of inept around anyone who is sick. Now, a sick animal....I am better with those. I never remember my mother being sick, and she didn't think anyone else ever got sick either. She would tell you to "get up and move around....you will feel better." I think sometimes that is the case....but, not always.

She loved to go to thrift shops and yard sales, and I used to take her but waited in the car, or shrink down in the backseat, when I was a kid....but now I love them and almost everything I own belonged to someone before me....pets included.

She knew a lot about nature....the names of all the birds, flowers, plants...even weeds, trees. It surprised me when I got old enough to notice that most peope have no idea the names of the most common wildflowers and birds and trees. So I am like her, in that way.

Now my daughter....polar opposite of me. Neat freak. One cat. Loves to read....I can't get interested in fiction at all. I try every year...make a New Year's Resolution to read more...I fail. I will read non fiction...autobiographies, books on how to do things....but fiction? No. I also don't watch tv. I quit when I was in jr high....only watch some news...less now than before, cooking shows, stuff like that. I like documentaries and watch them on youtube. I am proud of my daughter....she is very smart. Also has been a very good daughter and is a very kind, caring person. She is a city girl....loves the theater and activities available in Houston. I go when I have to.

My mother never learned to drive. I practically live in my vehicle. I don't drive as much as I used to....I used to put 50,000 miles a year on my cars. I have driven all over the USA, often alone....sometimes just my daughter and me, and sometimes my husband and me.

I kind of wonder what our kids would post here.

We get out more. Sure my parents were great about taking us places all over the country on vacation and we went to the beach (usually the Gulf coast) every summer. But we didn’t really go many other places on the spur of the moment, for instance to movies, except to visit with a family member.

I also cultivate a garden and really learn about what I’m doing. My mother planted a few things but never really took the time to learn about plants or how to care for them. She was a wonderful cook and she could figure out anything she wanted to bake. She passed on her love for roller coasters, however, as I love them, my DD loves them, and my DGD has now fallen in love with them after last year’s trip to Disney. My Dad was very charitable. He ran a business and was able to allow people to purchase things on credit they often couldn’t have purchased otherwise. I guess I got my streak of volunteerism & charitable giving from him.

Both parents kept stuff. Meaningless stuff in drawers. I know we had at least 3 junk drawers in a kitchen that probably only had 5 drawers. I think my mother finally threw out a bunch of it when they went through one move but goodness, I know it taught me to never ever do that. Sure, we have the usual drawer where the scissors, rubber bands, paper clips, and junk gets dumped and I end up cleaning it out about 4 times a year because I’m paranoid I will become my mother.