I'm bumping this up. I'm hoping the posters above who were using the CFL's are still around & will update me on how their plant(s) are doing. Irina, you said you were surprised that there is such an interest in CFL's and that we can only grow one plant with them. That's the whole point! lol I have my setup of the other AV's in another room, but I think many of us would like just one plant on a table in other rooms because we love the plants and want to see them all the time. It's not only a growing thing, it's also decorative. I have many regular houseplants, cactis and succulents, I grow them not only because I enjoy it, but I also use them to help decorate my home. AF's are too pretty to "hide." Now I'm thinking about buying two inexpensive, matching table lamps for my table. Those, a doily and a plant would be pretty. :)

Great advice, sweeby! Thanks so much for the idea. Unfortunately, like you I basically avoided the truth and did not record milestones etc. I can't accurately remember a lot of the details of her very early years. At least I kept all of the "official" documentation as well as samples of her work from age 3 on. However, it was frustrating to be asked over and over whether Alex echoed me, or used my hands to gesture, or whether there was ever a regression in skills, and on and on, with no clear memory about it. Did she reverse pronouns? Did she babble? When did she first use 2-word sentences? I had to tell them in many cases that I just didn't know. I could usually tell them when she had done something unusual and that if I hadn't noticed anything different, I thought it was probably pretty normal. Having 5 kids, I have a pretty good idea of what things were not typical. paige, how awful!! It's so sad that people can buckle under job pressure and trash their integrity. I don't see how anyone could do it. I do know, though, that it has happened to us twice in a less direct way. The playgroup teacher was simply unavailable for any documentation or official input, which I considered a breach of her contract but was obviously coming from "above." And the caseworker, who seems like such a lovely, warm person who cares about Alex when you're with her one-on-one, will turn on us in an IEP without batting an eye. DH told me to be very careful with what I say to her (I tend to trust people and will give way too much info). The district has made no secret of the fact that they want Alex off their sped rolls. Thank you for reminding me to be careful!!! A couple of days ago, I had a chance to speak briefly with Alex's new teacher (2nd grade). Alex was standing right there so I couldn't say too much. The teacher expressed amazement that Alex is on an IEP and said the usual we hear from teachers about how well she does, how smart she is, what a joy to have in class, etc. Then she went on to laugh about how much glue Alex used on her continents project that day. She marked Alex's project in red ink with words about not using so much glue and she called her "Miss Glue Girl" in front of other parents and kids after school. Alex burst into tears in the car and told me that she had had to do the project twice and still couldn't keep from getting glue all over. She said all the kids were watching. That's the kind of information I assumed would have been given to the teacher--Alex has *always* had a lot of difficulty with motor skills! Where are the reports and the people who are supposed to be working on Alex's behalf? I had requested a meeting with the teacher so that I could go over some of this stuff, but we hadn't had a chance to meet yet. Alex is left-handed, clumsy and awkward with any kind of project/art work/writing assignment, but there are easy accomodations for most of it (extra time, understanding that she *has* difficulty, left-handed scissors and perhaps a GLUE STICK????). The teacher also laughed about how serious Alex is. She told how she and another teacher were joking with her about her dress. They told her it was so pretty that they wanted it. When she just looked at them, one of them said, "What, you won't share your dress?" and Alex just looked at them and didn't laugh but frowned instead. Well, she doesn't understand that that is a joke. That remark would puzzle her because she wouldn't be sure how to take it. Again, that is something that has been noted in her records all along. This is the danger in teachers reporting that there are no problems and everything is fine!!!! Today she had a VERY hard time going to school because it's Fine Arts day. She absolutely dreads art day. In her arts class (or at least this was true last year), everyone does the same picture and they work on skills such as perspective, graphic sense, symmetry, etc. Alex is not able to do any of those things the "right" way, so her Woman or Dragon or Building looks very different from most of the other kids'. It does no good to tell her that art is what comes from the heart, because for a little girl attuned to following the rules and doing the best job, that is a moot point. Personally, I love her paintings because they are her and have a sort of Picasso-esque quality :) Luckily, we've not gotten to the age yet when these things are graded, but she knows the eyes on her person are not the same nor is the nose in quite the right spot etc so she is very unhappy with her work. Anyway, she has a little chime ball I gave her last year that hangs on a ribbon. I have had it for years. It's a little silver ball and if you shake it, will make a soft chiming noise. It's in a little basket thing so you can wear it as a pendant. I told her last year to imagine there was a little fairy inside and when she felt upset, to shake the ball and the fairy would sing to her. It worked pretty well and she told me that the fairy would sometimes tell her the right answers on her work. Today she put it on for Fine Arts. This year I gave her a small silver heart in a silk pouch for her to carry in her backpack. She gets it out when she is stressed and holds it in her hand to remind her how much Mama loves her and a piece of me is there with her to make her feel better. She made sure she had that today, too. We've not had as much trouble with meltdowns but she is very anxious and angry before and after school. She will sometimes go under her bed for a while and she likes the cupboard under the stairs. She goes in there with a little light and reads for a long time. I told her she's like Harry Potter, though I didn't mention that Harry didn't go in his cupboard out of choice.

Oh yes, many times. And I imagine this post is going to be long...... After my mom passed away I moved into my dad's house to keep him company (long before I married). Due to my mom's illness they had separate bedrooms. One night I was asleep in my mom's bed and something woke me up. My mom was standing at the end of the bed wearing what she had always called her white Mexican wedding dress. She smiled at me and told me that "everything would be alright", and then she was gone. We had given that dress to one of her good friends several weeks before who had always loved it. Many years later I had returned to work after a 3-month medical leave of absence. A couple hours after starting work I was standing by my office door and all of a sudden my legs went out from under me and I fell on the floor. I couldn't get up, my whole body was weak and like jello. I had such a horrible sense of emptiness. About 20 minutes later one my assistants paged me and told me that my step-mom had called and said that my dad had just passed away. She told me later that she lost it when she called and couldn't talk so just told my assistant about my dad. I felt so badly for that girl having to deliver the news to me. To this day I know exactly when my dad passed away because I felt him passing. That was over 21 years ago. I always knew that my dad was near me, always. I could often smell his pipe tobacco, which was a special blend and very distinctive. Sometimes when I needed it, sometimes for no reason, and I felt that other times were 'just because'. When my husband's dad passed away my DH told me that he could smell my dad's pipe tobacco for several days after (but I didn't) . When we moved to this home, in another state, nine months ago, I kept thinking that my dad wouldn't know where I was. Sure 'nuff, about a month after our move there was his distinctive pipe tobacco smell, altho it was only that one time. I grieved horribly for my dad until one night. I had a dream that he was driving his motorhome, my step-mom was in the passenger seat and I was kneeling between them. We were going down a tree lined street and could see police cars on a parallel street with lights and sirens, hundreds of them. We knew they were looking for us. My dad said he couldn't figure out why they would be after us. I told my dad that it was because no one was driving the RV. He said, "what do you mean? I'm driving!". I told him no, that he was dead and to the police it looked like there were two women in a speeding motorhome with no one driving it. We all busted out laughing and kept laughing. I woke up laughing, with tears in my eyes from laughing so hard (it woke my husband up too), and that was when I knew he was telling me he was OK. Now to the more paranormal part.....my husband and I lived in a home for 18 years. We were always seeing something dark out of the corner of our eyes but when we looked it moved away. When one evening I mentioned it to my husband he gave me a funny look and said that he's been seeing the same thing too. It was a male figure all in black, with a black coat, sometimes with a hat, sometimes not, that alway stood at the end of our hallway waiting for us to notice, then he would turn and walk down the hall. Even one of our neighbors saw it once. One of our dogs, a German Shepherd, would talk to it, at least that's what we like to think. When she started 'talking' we knew he was around but just couldn't see him. She often would wake us up in the middle of the night with her talking and tail thunking against something. It was like she would be listening, then answer, then talk more. Our other dog would cock her head and wag her tail while staring at something but didn't 'talk'. It really was kinda neat. We lost our 'talking' dog right before we moved from that house and my husband swore he could feel her head under his hand when he was watching TV for a long time after. I only had one freaky experience while living in that house. I was taking a shower one night and the bathroom light got really dim and it got really cold, even tho I was taking a hot shower. It was if someone had stood up on the toilet next to the shower, between the wall light and the shower, and was looking over the shower curtain bar, at least that's the feeling I got. Only lasted a few seconds then it was gone. Never happened again. When we had to move (due to my husband's job transfer) to another city we often wondered if we should have told the new owners that the house had a friendly ghost living there. :) We lived at our last home for almost 10 years and only had one experience a couple years after moving in. I was sitting in my home office facing the hallway door and saw a medium sized white dog trotting down the hallway. Our other dog was also a large GS and lab mix with no white in her coat. We didn't have a white dog and I knew I hadn't left an outside door open. Two days later we lost our remaining dog unexpectantly. About six months later we got another GS mix dog and to the day we moved, last year, I was always afraid that I would see that white dog again. This is fun to see what experiences others have had. Jenna

Wow so many with the same situation, although mine is not because of him losing a job in this economy. I always seemed to find the really nice guys that lacked motivation - I married two of them. My first husband was in finance, and figured that he could work fewer hours and manage to make enough. I was working and had two young children and he did not think that his free time was for housework or watching the kids even when I went to the gym - I had to get a sitter so that he would not have to commit to being home. No matter how much counseling or discussion between us could make him see how it felt to have him sitting on the front porch reading the paper while I was going crazy in the house getting lunches ready and the kids and me out of the house every morning. The neighbors even noticed! I felt if I was going to live like a single parent, I might as well be able to date, so I divorced him. And then I did the same thing again! What the heck was wrong with me?? When I met my second husband, he had a job, but all of his jobs were not long-term or careers -- he was also an under-employed carpenter. He was an awesome person, and a great step-father to my kids, but the housework was not even on his radar. However, with his more "flexible schedule", he was the one that could get a sick kid at school or be home if needed, so he was a bit of a house husband and that allowed me to concentrate on my job. But once the kids were off at college, I joked that he was my oldest child, but it really wasn't a joke. Unfortunately he died suddenly a little over a year ago, and although I miss him terribly, I am not going to make the same mistake again. I'm fortunate that I can support myself as I've been doing it for years anyway. If there is a next guy he will have to be at least where I am financially (which is not much!) and be interested in a true partnership. We all have to put up with stupid bosses and policies, but how can these men think it's OK to put their pride before their employment because they won't tolerate whatever they don't agree with? You can't be an employee and do things any way you want - we all have to suck it up for a job. If these guys didn't have a wife, I wonder what would they do? Please understand, I'm not knocking your hubbies - especially after the men I married! Many of you seem to be adapting to the new normal in your households. What makes it work is a sense of teamwork between the two of you, each doing what needs to be done. A wife can't be the breadwinner and then come home to housework & cooking while the husband plays - that situation won't last long without resentment.