Wedding update
Hello to my virtual bridesmaids!
Thought I would give you an update of my wedding plans and a new development.
Towards the end of July, while my fiancé and I were at my summer house in Connecticut, we finally got the invitations mailed. Three days later, my future in-laws met us for lunch and told us they would like to host a welcome cocktail party for all out of town guests the night before. We thought it was a wonderful idea and accepted their offer. We scrambled to find a place, and arranged for my future MIL to speak with the catering crew. (My future MIL is a very social, New York City gal. She is fabulous at party planning and loves to do it.) But what started as a casual cocktail party at a country club, quickly morphed into a sit down affair with assigned seating and a fancy plated dinner. It was absolutely the last thing we wanted. We wanted something fun and informal. We gently floated a different idea, an Oktoberfest theme, (our wedding is mid October) and she immediately abandoned her plans in favor of ours. Did I mention that she is absolutely wonderful and incredibly gracious?
So now we are planning a Oktoberfest dinner, complete with a pretzel dipping bar, great beers, schnitzel and other dishes, and apple strudel and chocolate cake for dessert. There will be lidded ceramic beer steins with flowers in them for the centerpieces.
The location is a beautiful country club overlooking the water.
The only glitch is that we will have to send out the Oktoberfest invitation to all of our out-of-town guests who have indicated that they will be coming to the wedding. (We have no idea if anyone's plans include the night before, just that they are coming. Too many hotels and other lodging options to get an exact number) We will ask them to respond asap via email. It's a bit of a roll of the dice, but we don't have many other choices. We would love some sort of wording to be printed on the envelope to ensure prompt action. Just can't think how to say it.
Sorry this is so long, but if you're still reading it, I would love to hear any thoughts and suggestions about this newest plan.
Jo
Comments (19)
Bonnie
6 years ago
deegw
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Thing One's wedding update
Comments (39)Guess what came in the mail today! An invitation to Nina's wedding for Thing One and FMTO. Now, she did ask me for their address, and I can't swear I ever got it to her. But she could easily get it several ways. But so what, who cares, that's not what's funny. What amuses me is that this time she got Thing One's name wrong! Remember how she hyphenated my name, even though my name isn't hyphenated, unlike my children's names, which are? Well, Thing One Doe-Smith's invitation came to Mr. Thing One Doe (she got FMTO's name right). So we came out even -- he got my name, I got his. What is strange is that Thing Two is on neither of our invitations, nor has she received one of her own (I am positive Nina does not have either Thing Two's current address in Israel or her school address for the fall). It doesn't matter, because of course none of us can attend, but it keeps things interesting. Back to Thing One's wedding ... FMTO sent me proofs of the invitations. They are lovely! They have a pretty tree at the top. What a thrill it was to see their names in the formal text. This is getting so exciting!...See MoreWedding invitation advice
Comments (31)Well, I've certainly managed to provoke a discussion :). I appreciate all of the different insights. Let me just start by saying that I'm certain the bride's decision not to invite children to the reception was not meant to hurt me specifically and was certainly not about me. I didn't think that I gave that impression but it looks like I must have. I'm hurt because I won't be able to bring my son to the wedding. I wanted him to be included, to dress him up & show him off, to let him see his cousins all dressed up...whatever my reasons, there they are & they are mine. This is going to be a large wedding and there are a lot of children in the extended families. Mine is not the only child that will be excluded. And I would NEVER ask nor expect her to make an exception for my son! It's her day, it should happen as she wants it to. That doesn't change the fact that I'm still upset that he will be. Am I being irrational? Maybe but that's how I feel. And I'm making the assumption that my niece told my mom because she wanted word to get back to me. I could be totally wrong about that. Sue36- there would not have been a confrontation. I'm not like that. If I WAS that sort of person I would have had my niece on the phone last night. As I said, I understand her reasons. But I'm still hurt. Momj47- we did attend a wedding with our son when he was about 18 months (specifically invited with child). He ran us ragged and it was certainly a day spent on alert rather than enjoying the event. I'm trying to look at this as a bright side to the "no kids" decision for my niece's wedding. And not having to be in mom mode for a few hours will be nice. Bunglogrl- how to put this. My family does not have the same "respect your elders" policy that yours does. It's rather a "my way or the highway". My mother has always been accomodating, never making waves and doing everything to keep the peace. As a result family members feel free to speak to her disrespectfully and basically tell her what's to be done. I'm the only one that calls them on it. The accepted method of communication within my family seems to be the grapevine method. She complains to you, you complain to somebody else & eventually word gets back to the complainee. I hate this, absolutely loathe it. I'm sure that in 4 months I can find a babysitter. Of course I suspect that my husband is delighted with the idea of skipping the wedding & not having to be subjected to my extended family for a few hours. Lowspark- you're absolutely right, it has become the norm for parents to expect to take their children everywhere. But what I've noticed is that lots of these children are brought but not supervised. There are many times at the playground where I'm the only parent on top of their child. I'm not saying that I'm mother of the year, just that as a consequence a lot of these children are out of control. And formal functions seem no different than the playground. At a christening a few weeks ago there was only one other child there with a parent that was keeping him in line. The rest of the children ran wild through the restaurant, the bar, etc. But both you & mrsmarv seem to "get" me so I must be getting my point across somehow. I think? Nina...See MoreWedding planning update
Comments (32)Thank you everyone for your great ideas and practical suggestions. I will speak to a florist in the next week or so and get an idea of what is available in October. As far as the dress goes, there is a good chance that I will be able to find something relatively inexpensive through a friend of mine who owns a dress shop. Any money I saved, will go towards flying in those expensive peonies. When I told my guy that I was leaning towards pennies, he smiled and said he didn't like the autumn pallet. It was to "kitschy " I asked him why he didn't say anything, and he said it was because it seemed like I loved it. He's a keeper. Kmarchese, what are the chances that your daughter and I picked the same inn? Mine is also on the finger Lakes, but I doubt it's known as a small inn. Although the lake is. :-) if I strike out with my friend and the dress, I will look in Rochester and or Philly. I know where Henrietta is, I will add that store to the top of my list in Rochester....See MoreHelp with Kitchen Layout!
Comments (8)I think your general layout is great, I absolutely would not put a microwave above the stove for practical and aesthetic reasons. I associate it with cheap apartments. Your kitchen actually looks very nice to me. 1) Put the microwave in one of the cabinets or undermount above the newly created countertop in the corner that is currently blocked by the fridge. 2) Pull the fridge and extend the countertop on the left side of the stove 3) make sure you have a vent hood 4) change the counter tops 5) you can change doors if you want, it is about 120-150/door, but maybe just hardware. Handles instead of tiny knobs. 6) refinish floor 7) put the refrigerator where one of the cabinet stacks goes. 8) move the island a bit further away from the range. 9) match the drawer front of the top right drawer/cutting board to the one in front of the sink...See More
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