Speaking of Tatoos........
irma
6 years ago
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Something I missed back in June
Comments (11)I was at Cochato this summer and saw that plant. What a beauty. Wish it was in my garden. I would even be happy to have the original "Krugerand" (on my lust list) because I have a thing for the golds. By the way, Cochato Nursery's display gardens are a "must see" for any hostaholic visiting Massachusetts!...See MoreI feel so uncomfortable..
Comments (33)It has been over two years since this post was written. Here is a quick update. We tried two assisted living facilities, we did a nursing home, we did three group homes, and during this time she's had a big hospitalization, so there was the acute care and a rehab hospital. We hired four different in-home aides to help. One ripped us off for about 40 thousand dollars. You read that right. Forty Grand. She'd take my MIL to the hairdressers or out to lunch, only she was stopping at the bank for my MIL and would take a few thousand each trip. She cleaned my MIL out from her savings. And, she took some antique linens, some jewelry from my MIL and me. She took some Polish Pottery from my china cabinet, and basically, had a field day at our expense. (Yes, there are police reports. Only no prosecutions as my MIL is the primary witness and she is useless and the aide swears that it was all given to her as gifts.) One aide was horrible and we canned her after two weeks of paying her to sit and drink coffee and do nothing, the other two were okay, but not worth the money or time. As soon as my MIL would say she didn't want a shower or whatever, they felt compelled to honor her patient rights. The facilities, to a last one all failed. My MIL was a horrible fit for each one and ended up turning me into the state, the county, and to adult protective services for abuse. I have had five intense and complete investigations due to my MIL's claims (proven to be lies after investigations.. oh gee, she'd lie?? I call her "The Patron Saint of All Holy Liars), and all of them proved my MIL has progressive dementia and that not only am I not abusive to her (or anyone), but that I am the standard bearer or the gold standard of in-home care giving and wouldn't it be great if everyone was as good as I am. Yea, why doesn't everyone give up their lives for the demented aims of the demented. So, my MIL is still here. The granddaughter is going to be 4 years old soon. I spend as much time as I can with our granddaughter and make every effort to make the basic care for my MIL but to stay away from her as much as possible. My MIL is worse than she was, but is stable and healthy here. She is quite happy to see her son everyday and she gets on the telephone with her friends and goes on and on about what a horrible woman I am. I don't cry as much, I don't complain as much, and I don't lash out for a life much anymore. I have come to accept that I am worthless and will have to either wait until she finally dies or I get the balls up myself to walk out on my husband and kiss this dream good bye. Because.. this dream is a nightmare. Oh yea, a couple of her friends have come here to rescue her from me. They believed her stories. One even came with her adult daughter my age and a traveling caregiver to help with the transfer to take my MIL with them and out of my evil clutches. When they saw the truth, they were shocked and ashamed. And, they LEFT HER! I would have been thrilled to have had them take her! But, they said they wouldn't be able to give her the care she needs.. BS! They saw what a wicked old crone she was and didn't want her in their lives. We've never heard from them again!! So, two years down the road and my life is as bad, if not worse. She's either not fit or been kicked out of every facility we've tried. I could tell you the graphic accounts, but trust me on this.. you don't want to have to read it. It is hard to find any happiness in life at all. And, I know that she is going to be here until I die. Not her.. me. And, my death is something I look forward to now. Amazing how much life can change in two years.....See MoreShould I give dh a chance or give dh the cold shoulder?
Comments (17)Don't give him cold shoulder. Lay it all out. Specifically. I don't like it when you _____________ because I feel _____________ when that happens. Then tell him what you will do. Example. My 7 year old (yep, because that's how old your dh is acting!!) keeps not appreciating what I do for her. Not only that, but acting like a little brat prior to us doing fun stuff. I finally told her today that I am tired of feeling like this. I told her I cannot control what she does, but I can control how I react to it. So the next time she doesn't listen to me about eating in the living room or whatever, I'm not going to get all upset. We're just not going to do the fun stuff we had planned. Then I won't feel that she's taking advantage and martyr myself. End game. I think she got it. So, what will you do when DH does something like that? DH: I think your tattoos are hideous. You: I apologize for my husband. That was innappropriate to say to you, a guest in our home. Would you like to come with me to the patio for some tea? DH: Rush Limbaugh is an idiot, I don't see how any smart person could listen to him. You must be an idiot. You: It's obvious we have different opinions on this subject. Aren't politics a heated subject!! By the way, Aunt Jen, this is a lovely coffee cake. How did you make it so fluffy and light? By doing that, it takes the attention from him, lets him and everyone know that you won't stand for it, and lets him off without the humility of being kicked or told off. Just smile, and cut him off at the chase. Diffuse while in the heat of it, then when you get him alone have specific things to tell him, without anger or blame....See MoreWhy are some animals okay to eat and others are taboo?
Comments (56)Two points. Torture is a relative term. Is it torture when a lion catches an antelope and begins eating it before the antelope is completely dead? Is it torture for the antelope to be chased by the lion? Is there really any difference between the terrified antelope and a cow being forced up a killing chute and killed quickly with a blow to the head? Humanoids have eaten plants and animals since before we were Homo sapiens. We killed animals however we could. Forcing herds over a cliff and leaving most of the animals to rot, since there were too many to eat before the rest began to decay. Most people in the US are appalled by the thought of eating dog or horse meat. Because we have enough wealth to keep those animals as pets, making them more special to us. I can't visualize eating monkey meat and I would never open a clam/oyster and eat the insides. I have tried roasted opossum(once was enough---greasy, nasty tasting) and like rattlesnake. I've butchered chickens, hogs, and cows, processed them, cooked them, and enjoyed eating them. What people eat is what they grow up eating. Point two. Everything dies. Some things die quickly, some die slowly. Ever see a cow or deer with wasting disease? Or a starved horse or a dog? Pitiful sights. Makes me mad. People have the ability to choose what they want to eat. Those same people have no right to force me to abide by their beliefs---like PETA(I like my version of P(eople)E(ating)T(asty)A(nimals). You want to eat chocolate covered spiders? Have at. Don't be surprised if I say "No Thanks"....See Moreirma
6 years agoirma
6 years agoirma
6 years agoElmer J Fudd
6 years ago
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