A friend of mine had a heart attack and was technically dead for several minutes before they brought her back. She said it was like she took a dreamless nap. No visions,no light,nothing. In the minutes before my grandpa died,he was telling grandma about the beautiful garden with hummingbirds he was seeing. When that grandma died a few years ago,she was talking to grandpa right before she passed. Like,really talking to him. She said "Bill? Is that you? You look so young. Come help me up." I guess it's different for everyone. We'll all know what it's like one day won't we?

When you die, you leave your physical body behind so whether it's got organs or not is irrelevant, whether it's in tact or cremated or in a box 6' under, it matters not.

Just as every birth is unique, so is every death.

My brother died at the age of 38 from AIDS-related complications (medical-speak for another disease killed him, but it wouldn't have if his immune system hadn't been so compromised by HIV). When he converted from HIV+ to full-blown AIDS, he was hospitalized and not expected to live through the night. He did make it through the night, and even though he nearly died three more times during his 9+ week hospitalization, he didn't die until a year later.

During one of the episodes when he nearly died, he had a "near-death experience." His lungs were in such bad shape from the pneumonia that he was on a CPAP and couldn't really talk. So, we had legal pads for him to write on. I still have them, including the one where he wrote about seeing the most stunningly beautiful garden. He wrote that he "saw his spot" and that it was so beautiful and so peaceful.

As I promised him I would be, I was with him when he died. He was in the hospital. He'd been admitted several days earlier, and I was with him in the hospital 24/7, as was my husband. But that morning when he woke up, he matter-of-factly announced, "I'm going to die today." I told him that, yes, he was going to die, but that none of us knew when it would be. He replied that he knew it would be that day.

He had breakfast, and ate more than he had eaten for several days. A while later two nurses came in to change the sheets on the bed and give him a sponge bath. He was chatting away when he suddenly quit talking. His eyes were open, staring straight ahead, but he wasn't moving at all. I told one of the nurses to get the doctor and I went to my brother's side and put my arms around him, and my husband held my brother's hand. We talked softly to him, telling him that it was ok for him to go. His eyes squeezed shut for a couple of moments, then he was gone.

I read that the actor Dudley Moore, as he was dying, said, "I can hear the music all around me".

I think that's comforting.

I was only 3 when I was electrocuted and my dad performed resuscitation and brought me back. I do remember it, I could see everything that was happening around me. I was too young to fully understand. My mom was talking to my dad, who had been gone for years, before she passed.

I believe near death is simply a matter of trauma induced brain chemistry or oxygen deprivation. The body's hormonal activity changes. That would also affect brain activity. Several hallucinogenic drugs seem to promote similar hallucinations. Some drugs create a coma like state that leaves one with an "out of body" sensation. Very similar to people's accounts of near death experiences.

Whether the process of actually dying is the same we will all have to wait and see.

My Dad was a simple man. He was not much of a philosopher or dreamer, but as he lay dying on a hospital bed, my mother reported, he raised off the pillow and said, "Life is sweet.", and then dropped back on the pillow. He was gone.

There are many books about people including children who have died and come back if you are interested in their stories. See, e.g., Closer to the Light

I didn't die, but was dying. It felt like going to sleep.

My son tells me he died. We were gardening and enjoying the sun outside and the conversation was totally unprompted. He died being born (see above). He told me as very small child what it was like. Old enough to talk, but not old enough to have heard very much (very sheltered) about life, much less death. He said he went up to a door and knocked on it. He actually told me Jesus answered it. I said, how do you know who was answering it? He felt love, pure love. His face said to me, and that remark, it truly was. I had been neglecting church, I didn't pray, he wasn't in daycare, we weren't around anyone who talked about Jesus/God/Heaven, etc. ??? He went into the room that had a fireplace (we didn't have one, never did think of anyone who did that we were around), a rug, a rocking chair. He was held and rocked until he was told he had to go back. He was very happy when he was talking about it. That's how little he was. He did not have the full range of words for emotions, so I just had to guess on my own.

My mother didn't have a near death experience, but I'd say she had a premonition of her death coming soon. In August of 2002 I was visiting her and she asked if we'd mind taking her to visit my brother in Arizona, as she hadn't seen him in 3 years. He was actually planning a visit home to Canada the following Spring, but Mom didn't seem happy until we agreed to plan a trip to visit him for Christmas.

Before I left my mother's place, she started opening cupboards and closets and giving me things to bring home with me. Her excuse was that she was having her condo repainted and needed to empty everything anyway, so she decided I might "have some use for some of these things that were cluttering her space." I tried to refuse, but she insisted I take a box of items, so I did.

December came and we took my mother with our family on the trip to Arizona to visit my brother. Sadly, while there, she ended up having a sudden massive and died. We returned to Canada and had her funeral and of course all my siblings were together.

Unbeknownst to me, before leaving on the vacation with my family, our mother had driven over to all of my 5 siblings' homes and given them each a framed photo of her. Every sibling was given the same 8x10 photo in the same nice frame. She apparently told each sibling that she'd been 'cleaning her condo' before leaving for our trip, and came across her favourite photo of her (she never really liked having her picture taken) and had copies made and framed for all of us.

They told me they'd each been a bit freaked out when she brought them a framed photo of herself on her last visit to them, right before leaving on our trip. It made them all feel strange that she didn't just wait until she returned from her trip and simply given them the photo the next time they happened to get together. But she insisted they take it from her, so they all did. (I'd actually received my framed photo back in the summer, as she'd put it in the box of stuff she gave me.)

When we opened her safe deposit box that contained her Will, she had enclosed that very same photo, with instructions that it be the photo we used for her Obituary, as it was her favourite photo.

We all felt that even though she had just had a physical and her doctor said she was fine to travel out of the country (she had a pacemaker) she must have somehow felt her days were numbered and really wanted us each to have that photo she loved so much, to remember her by.

Clearly my weird feeling when she gave me the box of items in the summer was not without reason. Despite only being 70 and seeming in pretty good health, I think Mom just knew somehow as far back and maybe earlier than August, that she wouldn't be around the following Spring and wanted to make sure she saw the one of her children that she hadn't seen in 3 years, before she died.

As I said in the other thread, I'm inclined to believe a lot could simply be hallucination but of course nobody will know until they're dead. There's also the question of are you really dead if you "come back to life"? While technically "dead" are you really dead in reality? I'd have to think no. Again, something to ponder.

There's no doubt in my mind that a lot of people know when they're going to die. Perhaps not to the second but they seem to be able to tell that their bodies are giving out. Recently a friend's mother told him she was going to die soon. Which, in a way is a "duh" comment since she was nearly 90, not the greatest health and in a nursing home. He was worried and we talked about it. Sometimes she looked for attention, but as I said, people seem to often know that they're dying.

My brother was dying in another state, I was unable to travel there but my mother went to be with he and his wife. Towards the end he saw demons - little ones, big ones, walking about. Once, according to Mom he called out to his wife, "Jane! Come in here, look at this really big one! Oh my gosh,he's HUGE!" He was dying of cancer and was on a pain med probably morphine. Still my mother believes he really did see them. He had led a not so perfect life.

DH's grandmother kept talking to me and everyone else about being ready to go for 2 days before she died. She was fine and getting around as usual. Then, in the night, she sat up to go to the bathroom, fell back on the bed and died of a massive stroke.

GF's grandmother lived here, but most of her family was in Germany. Somehow, she always knew when a family member died. Later that day or the next day, she'd get a call from home.

Cynic, I totally agree that some know when they're going to die.

My neighbor & good friend lost her second battle with cancer. 3 days before she died she made a HUGE dinner & invited myself & all of her friends over. She cleaned her condo spotless. The next day she drove herself to the hospital when she died the next day.

I was in disbelief. But was told that the bulb usually burns brightest before it goes out.

I had to have my dog of 14 years euthanized when a cancerous tumor burst. He was trying to fight to stay alive after the vet gave him the shot to put him to sleep. I held his head & said its ok to go. I didn't want to but knew it was best. He took 1 last breath & he was gone.

Here's his last picture on the exam table before the euthanasia shot. 6/4/14 was a very bad day. I still miss my little buddy.

I wrote this for him 2 years ago on national dog day.

In honor of national dog day, I must give a shout out to Dief. You gave me 14 years of the best of your life & not a day goes by that I don't think about our last day together. It was a surprise for me even though u knew how sick u were. I knew it would happen 'someday' but never really prepared. I petted your face the whole drive to the vet & carried u since u were unable to walk. I never expected to see that huge tumor inside your belly & how much weight u had lost. U were always so brave. And in the end when u were dying on the table, u still looked me in the eye & I knew it was goodbye. U were the best dog & I wish u were back home with Max & I. We're lost without u. But your at peace & no pain. I love u Dief with all my heart & Max says hello too! Kisses. Scott.

That is beautiful, Scott. I've had to have two dogs euthanized, it's not an easy decision. One back in the 80's, one about 10 years ago. I held them both, talking to them as the vet did the injection. My only comfort was knowing they would finally be free of pain.

But I'm curious as to what prompts your question. Of course I don't know the answer, but I like to believe the near death stories, the ones where the person sees a bright light to follow, and feels a warm, loving presence guiding them. Not those seeing demons! Have you ever watched "Touched by an Angel"? That's how I like to think of it.

According to the bible, our soul (or 'spirit') leaves our body and dwells in "the bosom of Abraham" until the time Jesus returns to this earth. That's when our Eternity will be decided. But our bodies stays here on earth, returning to the dust from whence they originally came. I can't explain it very well, but perhaps you could talk to your pastor.

Rusty

Re the "seeing demons". I'm not sure that's what they were to my brother, that was my mother's interpretation. Whatever they were he seemed awed by them, not frightened.

My SIL's mother died at age 105. She had been in a nursing home for several years, always accompanied by a private aide. One day she looked at the aide and said "oh, I'm dying." and she did. Just like that. So I guess we feel it coming? I don't know. My sister died in her sleep, of cancer. She promised to come back and visit me if she could. She never has. Oh well, we will meet again some day. Maybe.

My friend's mother developed heart failure in her mid fifties, but she always underplayed when she wasn't feeling great, so my friend assumed her mother had better health than the actual reality. Thankfully, her mother lived to see her daughter married, so my friend will always have those wonderful shots with her mother in her keepsake wedding photos. Sadly, her mother died shortly afterwards.

Her father had to call and break the news to her that her mother had died, on the day she was flying home from her honeymoon. His wife had asked him to bring her to the hospital early that morning, as felt very weak. They said she was in acute heart failure and medication would no longer help.

My friend's Dad told her that her mother asked him to relay that she had forced herself to live long enough to attend the wedding, and she had wanted her daughter to have a lovely honeymoon with her new husband, but that she simply didn't have enough energy to hang on any longer.

She said she was in no pain, but felt like she had been walking for a hundred miles, and was just so deadly tired that she needed to finally stop walking. She told her husband she felt it best if she died before their daughter returned, as she felt it would be too hard to say goodbye to her only child in person, and didn't want to pass from this world, seeing her daughter cry. She hoped her daughter would understand.

As heartbroken as she was, my friend did tell me she couldn't have taken saying goodbye to her mother in person, without sobbing her heart out and probably begging her mother (only 56 years old) to hang on long enough to perhaps see a grandchild born, which realistically would have probably been impossible.

She also told me later that it was typical of her mother's unselfish nature to pick the day of returning from the honeymoon to pass away, so that the honeymoon wouldn't be traumatically cut short for a return flight home. Her mother had literally kept herself alive just exactly as long as she felt would be best for all.

My aunt died several years ago on her 50th wedding anniversary in the hospital with my uncle by her side..we think that she held on to reach her anniversary and then allowed herself to pass on..wonderful for her 2 daughters that she made it to her 50th anniversary..

I don't know what it feels like to die but will share this story about a friend of mine. It may be a little off topic. I had a neighbor when I lived in another town that was a good friend. He was very intelligent, kind of an introvert and didn't socialize very much with other people but we became good friends. He was 9 years older than me. I moved about 20 miles away but used to call him or go see him from time to time or he would come here. It had been several weeks since I had last talked to him, and I called and his phone was shut off. That caused me to panic. I thought he had died and no one told me....which wouldn't be unusual for his family. They were even odder than he was.

I rushed over there and he came to the door in his underwear, had a long beard, and looked like the stories I had heard of Howard Hughes...except he didn't have kleenex boxes for shoes. He was very depressed....no food in the house except some moldy burritos in the fridge that he had bought at a convenience store. Empty wine bottles stacked like cord wood in every cabinet in the kitchen. Hadn't picked up his mail, so he hadn't paid any bills. Didn't realize his phone had been shut off.

To make a long story a little shorter, I cleaned his house, got food for him, paid his bills, etc. I thought he was going to die any day. That is how bad he looked but he didn't want to go to the doctor. So I took care of him. He lived 8 more years. Every day I went over there to see about him. At the end, I was there as often as 4 times a day, even sleeping on the floor to stay with him.

We talked about death and dying many times. He had emphysema very bad...still smoked all the time. I asked him to contact me when he died, if he could. He didn't believe in stuff like that, but finally, he said he would.

I was with him when he died (at home). I was talking to him and asked him if he wanted something to drink. He said yes. I went to the kitchen, got a Gatorade for him and came right back, and he took two shallow breaths and was gone. Just that quick.

A few months after he died, I dreamed I got a phone call from him. It was so real....just like he was in life....the way he came across. He said, "Why don't you come to see me any more?" I didn't want to tell him that he had died and his niece, who he didn't like, was now living in his house. So, I said, "You don't live where you used to." He said "What?!" I said, "Ken, you died." He sounded incredulous when he said, "Are you sure about that?"

The "are you sure about that?" was a phrase he often used when I told him something he didn't quite think was right.

I don't know how much stock I put in dreams but it was so real....just like he was talking to me. I was closer to him than almost anyone. The last 8 years of his life I had spent so much time with him....we talked about everything. I can always feel his presence around me. I don't know how to describe it. It is almost like he didn't die and is nearby, just not physically with me at the moment.