Dsg, ha, your post reminded me of a time we were at Tequanimum Falls . That's black bear country. My husband was terrified during our hike after coming across some fresh-ish bear poo. He asked what to do if we came across one. I told him not to worry unless it was a mom with Cubs , then, roll into a ball and play dead. He said, the Bears made that up lol.

Outside, my new neighbor just asked me to watch her house while gone. I thought that she just wanted me to make sure no vans drove up and carted off all her stuff so I said yes. Well, after I said yes she said, and, take care of my indoor plants. Yikes! There are orchids and all sorts of temperamental's in there.

i have a full month to kill them off.

Too funny, Oakley! We'll have to have a whistle-off contest next time I'm in Oklahoma. My friend, Barbie, taught me how to whistle on the bus coming home from middle school one day. With some crazy 13 year old reasoning, I thought I'd never be able whistle because I had never been able to do a cartwheel. I warned you that it was crazy reasoning (LOL). After a few lame tries that produced nothing but spit, I let out a really loud whistle. We were sitting in the back of the bus. Everyone turned to look. Our bus driver slammed on the brakes and promptly kicked Barbie and I off the bus. Thankfully we were close to home already

Lynn, I get it. adolescents are strange beasts, but cute ( I am a middle school teacher)

TR- i hope you have more success learning to whistle than I do.

I can't crochet and experts in my family have all tried to teach me. I can chain stitch just fine but that is it. Not too long ago I tried to teach myself with books and videos- still no success. I have not given up, so I can't crochet yet.

I can't make gravy. I can do a white sauce, a cheese sauce, just about any sauce you desire, but once you call it gravy it gets all lumpy and gross. WTH?

I was never able to do a cartwheel And at this age, I'm for sure not going to try.

I can't play bridge, but I'm good at spades.

I can change a tire, the oil and put air in the tires, drive a stick but don't intend to anytime soon. I am also able to drive DH nuts in less than 2 seconds. ;-)

I can whistle, weakly. I can paint, prep & trim.

I never was able to grasp the concept of Algebra or Geometry. And really, can't say as I've ever needed it.

I cannot hang a picture or anything else, that requires 2 nails, (one on each end) straight EVEN with a level. I leave that up to DH.

I tend to read instructions AFTER I begin the project, and even then it takes several times before it makes any sense. I have to break it down into basic steps. (I really think I have some mild form of Dyslexia and the older I get the worse it gets)

I haven't been able to make a good pie crust, but I keep trying.

and I can't seem to lose weight.

This thread gets even more interesting ;-) I'd forgotten I can do a cartwheel, but never successfully a backwards roll (reverse somersault). I'd skip gym when tumbling was planned so I wouldn't embarrass myself. I had come down so awkwardly with a substitute teacher in class, it took my breath away momentarily and frightened me, I didn't want to try or practice.

I think my sister retained every note of every piano lesson either of us ever had, and even gave lessons herself for a while. Not me. But - I have to make her gravy holidays, her gravy is terrible.

OMG, Allison, I had no idea either!

I know what animal male/female/baby/neutered names are.

I can whistle with my fingers in my mouth.

I can make gravy. You can too. A wire whisk is your friend.

I love "some assembly required." But I learn things best by taking them apart.

I can't do houseplants either. I haven't had a single one in my house since the early 80s. That's what windows are for, to see plants that grow outside.

I can't read when a car is moving.

So many of these are making me laugh!

For those who can't grow house plants, I found this somewhere recently (maybe here!) for my SIL. It fits her perfectly.

Well, I just taught myself to stadium whistle with reasonable success!

Man, my cats are pissed now.

TR, I've been able to do the whistle with 4 fingers for years. My dad taught me and he could do it with 2, 4, or no fingers at all. I never heard it called a stadium whistle before. I just practiced with my cats on either side of me on the couch and I can tell they think I'm an a-hole.

I can drive a stick, whistle and bake a great pie crust.

I can't muster interest in techy things so I haven't learned to use the various TV remotes and I'm dragging my feet getting a new cell phone, though I need one.

Here's my big confession - I've never booked a flight or traveled by plane alone. DH's work requires travel so it's second nature for him to navigate airports, shuttles, hotel bookings, etc. so he does that and I manage all the home prep, packing, dog boarding, etc. when we travel. I could do it if I had to, but the prospect of getting myself from home to my DS's home overseas all on my own is daunting.

LOL, Linelle! Zephyr is probably longing for another Kleenex box!

amck2, I had never booked a flight until I was 59. It's true I hadn't traveled by air that much before then, but either my dad or husband had taken care of it. Now that I'm on my own, if I don't do things myself, no one else will and it won't get done. Booking a couple of solo trips to Israel and surviving El Al security have given me my confidence back. Recently I traveled across the country with 3 others for business and did all the flight, hotel, and rental car bookings. All it takes is a little confidence and shopping around.

I really shouldn't drink my coffee while reading this. Allison, people have explained the cow thing so many times and I still can't remember. Go ahead and give me an "F." lol.

Lynn, you got kicked off the bus? Seriously? Well, at least it was for a good reason. :)

As much as I've tried, I can't fold a fitted sheet properly. I fold then roll it and stuff it in the drawer.

Linelle is right. A wire whisk is your friend for gravy making.

I'm sure there are plenty of things I don't know how to do but I outsource the task, if necessary, or I just stop thinking about it.

After reviewing the other posts, I can say that I don't know how to stadium whistle but I've never had a reason to learn. The need, or desire, to do it has never come up in my life. I don't have cats to annoy.

Stadium whistling apparently annoys husbands as well. Just sayin'.

You're trying to entice me to learn it, aren't you TR? But I think I already have plenty in the 'things that annoy husbands' category.

LOL, hhireno. Oh me too! I've apparently added one more thing to my repertoire, and his withering looks during "practice time" last night conveyed an unmistakable message that enough's enough. ;-)

This was perfect to read after posting in the Target thread! Withering looks...hahaha.

Annie, I thought I was the only photo-bomber!! I bombed Photography 101, TWICE. Dropped it before I failed. Composition? No problem. Dark room? No problem. Depth of field? Aperture?? No go.

I just went back to driving a manual car, AND riding a bike, after about a 30 year hiatus.

i think I cannot sing, but a lot of people say differently....I do have a good ear for music, and can tell when an instrument needs tuning, but I have no idea how to do that!

I don't know how to program the preset list of radio stations in my car, so I manually change the stations.

I don't know how to change the ink on my printer, and if my DH is out of town, well, I'm outta luck.

I don't know how to graciously accept a compliment, but I'm working on it. Just this weekend, a young woman complimented my jacket, and instead of my usual "Oh-this-old-thing?" type of response, I simply said, "Thank you." It wasn't that hard.

I don't know how to except a complement either, I get embarrassed and change the subject after I murmur thank you.

I don't know how to except a complement either, I get embarrassed and change the subject after I murmur thank you

I have a lovely friend who does this, and it drives me nuts. (Sorry, JT!) We often text or email, and if I compliment her in writing, she almost always ignores it completely. I really wish she would work on this, because it leaves me wondering if I said something wrong - or in the wrong way - and wishing I'd never said anything at all. It's very awkward. It's actually a kindness to be able to accept a compliment graciously, IMO.

Justerrilynn, I'm embarrassed by compliments, too, and used to dismiss them with self-deprecating comments. Like if someone would compliment my blouse, I'd say something like "Oh I've had this for years... " or "It's laundry day and I had nothing else to where!" Then along the way I realized (or someone pointed out to me) that when I responded like that, I'm criticizing the other person's taste. So I started replying with a smile and "thank you." That's all... I have to admit it takes practice because I've had a lifetime of conditioning with bad retorts.

This one is embarrassing. lisad82 and her car radio made me remember it. I don't know how to change the time on my car clock. Instead of getting out the manual and figuring it out, I always subtract ten minutes or add one hour and then subtract ten minutes, depending on the time of year. Anyone who gets in my car thinks they can figure it out, but no one ever has. It used to drive me nutty. Now I don't even notice.

cattyles, is it an Audi per chance?:) As much as I loved that car, changing the clock was not at all intuitive. Even DH could never figure it out and he's super good at that kind of thing. New car is much, much easier!

I don't know how to jump start a car...and probably wouldn't know how to change a tire, although I would attempt it if I had to.

It's a Honda S2000. I had an Accord before the S2000 and it is not the same process at all. I think they made it deliberately quirky because it has stumped all that have tried.

I'm a big believer in RTFM.

There are some things for which one shouldn't have to RTFM twice a year.

Linelle, RTFM for all the things listed or just car clocks?

OH I have a radio in my truck that I have to drag out the manual every time the time changes, it's so ridiculously difficult. The other truck, you just hold the button down and the time changes, could not be easier. HA!

I finally thought of something that I do not know how to do, I do not know how to can food. The idea of it scares me, it seems so difficult and you have to get everything just perfect so it seals and stuff. My mom just never taught me how to do anything in the kitchen. She was a great cook and she would put up preserves but she didn't ever show us how to do it. My sister, who is almost 70, just this last year made jelly and other preserves. She told me it was very simple but she had someone showing her what to do. OH and a pressure cooker, I do not know how to use one of those either. I could fill a book with things that I do not know how to do, but everyone has already said them, these were a couple different things.

I cannot open my eyes under water. Now, my vision is bad enough it would not matter anyway but as a kid it was terrible. I would try and try and try to do it in the bathtub, swimming pool, lake, etc and it was not happening. This unfortunately led to me stopping swimming lessons, which I enjoyed immensely, because the teachers would pressure me and I just could not do it.

I have a hard time figuring out initialized expressions. Like RTFM.

(Had to look it up, now I get it!)

ML

I can't do metric conversion

I can't type without looking at the keys (but I am VERY fast)

I can't whistle....at all

I can't tell you my left from my right w/o pausing to think about it

I can't remember roman numerals

I can't quit doing many things in excess ( not giving up quite yet tho!)

I need to look up stadium whistle because I'm not sure if I do that particular kind. I touch my thumb and forefinger together to make a circle, and slip it under the tip of my tongue and blow.

Lynn, how do you whistle?

I don't use a riding lawnmower. Even though I can use a stick, those mowers scare me to death! The first and only time I used it I was parking it in the shed like DH told me to do (he was standing there), and I couldn't find the brakes (there are none) and ran over a Gerbil wheel and gave the mower a flat tire.

Ladies, listen closely. If some things scare you off, like electrical stuff, which would include changing filters in the hvac, tell your DH's in a sweet little voice, "I'm just a girl, I can't do that." Mine buys it every time. Sometimes we need to turn a blind eye to women's lib when it suits us. ;)

" Then I'm corrected and told it's a calf. I'm sorry, but I'm not going to look at the cow's private parts to tell the difference, they're cows, okay?

Wait a minute, isn't a calf a young cow or bull? lol

I don't know Cam, they're all the same to me unless they have horns. :) Aren't males the only ones who have them? The farmer who has the land next to us puts the cattle to graze on the wheat when it's green, and also in the pasture. He' had this longhorn for about 15 years, and that poor thing walks with his head lopsided! I don't know why they never took them off.

Whether or not cattle have horns depends on the breed. Some breeds are "horny" (ha - sorry, couldn't resist), male and female.

As for RTFM:

I usually try to figure it out on my own first. When that fails, I RTFM. I used to always have to do that for my car's clock for the twice-annual time change. It took me several years to get enough reps in so that it became obvious how it's done.

My drip irrigation controller is a real b****. I'm careful to make notes and leave them in the manual.

I can't dance.

I had to google RTFM, too. Probably because I never do... (RTFM!)

I can't use the mousepad on a laptop. Something about a sort of electrical charge or something... I've accidently re-arranged an entire folder structure in a nano-second, once.

......... dance.

Sing.

Iron. I make it look worse than before.

Do directions. It's amazing I can make it off our street.

Bake well. Fry things.

Learn other languages.

Do math.

Work the DVD, Netflix, etc. I can't watch movies unless DH or DD are home.

Paint walls/trim. I mean, I can, but it's best that I don't. I get impatient and sloppy.

Clean windows well. Ditto ovens.

Use a flat iron on my hair. I end up looking like the Cynthia doll on Rugrats.

Listen to country music. I'd rather stab my ears with ice picks.

Use a drill well. I'm dangerous with it. Stay back.

Find good deals--coupons, credit card rewards, miles, etc. I just can't figure it all out. I know people who are all, "I earned a free trip! I got $120 worth of groceries down to $11!" TEACH ME YOUR WAYS.

Pronounce certain words. Apocalypse, abominable, and so on. I get the letters mixed up, much to the amusement of family and friends .... and dashed any hopes of public speaking.

Have more confidence in myself. I'm hard on me.

Oh MizGG, thanks for the laugh (especially after the speak up thread!). Now I am off to google Cynthia on Rugrats. LOL!!

Tishtosh I can sympathize about opening eyes under water. I'm the same way. I remember filling the sink when I was a child, putting my face in it and trying so hard to make myself open my eyes. Just never could. For the same reason I can't wear contacts, I can't make myself touch my eyeballs.

MizG, I'm the same way about pronouncing words. DH is always correcting me but in a cute way with a smile.

As far as credit card rewards go, you'll like this. On my statements they always said how many "miles" I've earned. Well, I had no plans to fly anywhere so I ignored those miles for fifteen years! Until I mentioned all the miles I have to a friend. She told me I can get other things, not just miles.

This was about 4 years ago. I went to the cc website and discovered I had hundreds of dollars in gift certificates I could get...for free. All to stores I shop at, to restaurants, nice movie theaters. It was like Santa came. lol.

This is one I just found out about. Neither me or my husband is capable of disarming house alarms. The new neighbor that asked me to watch her house, get her mail and water finicky indoor plants kept screwing her code up as she was giving it to us. So, I asked husband to go with me. It was like dumb and dumber tring to get all the sirens shut off. The women/owner ended up doing it on her end . I ended up standing in the front of the lawn hoping the neighbors weren't sending a fleet of squad cars.