21 years ago I was offered a substantial promotion, but it meant moving to a city I'd only been to once, for a seminar. It was at the other end of the state, far away from family and friends and it wasn't sure if my then boyfriend (now DH) would go with me. I had to do a lot of soul searching and I agreed to the job. We were living in a rental, so it wasn't a problem to move, but it took me over a month to find us a suitable home to rent in the new city. My kids & the cat stayed with my folks, my boyfriend in our camper at his brothers house, our dog was boarded and I moved north and rented a room with a distant cousin of a former co-worker.

I remember one day after meeting with a realtor about finding a place, I was driving around this unfamiliar town and just bawling, worried I'd made a huge mistake.

It turned out to be the best chance I've ever taken in my life. We did get a house, everyone moved up and my BF started a new business. Within a year I got another promotion and I kept moving on up. We love the town we live in, the kids consider it their hometown.

I'm now about to embark on another chance move-I'm considering a job that pays me quite a bit less, but would free me from a place of misery. I'm 98% sure they'll offer me the job-it'll come down to pay if I take it. At this point in my career it's a big chance. My final retirement pay is based on my last 3 years salary-so this could have a big impact. I'd also be going into a different field. But I am a firm believer that if we don't take these chances, we'll have to learn to live with the regret of what if.

I've made career changes (including one that meant taking 3 years off to go back to school), moved across the continent and left my family behind when I got married, went on a solo trip to New Zealand and Australia with the only definite part of my itenerary being the flights there, between them and back home. DH and I moved 2000 miles with a 2 and a 5 yr old in tow, no jobs waiting for us, a house for sale (with a mortgage) behind us and a new mortgage and home on the other end. Every one of them had risks -- and they may even sound like I'm crazy, but they've all been calculated risks and they seemed like the best choices at the time. And they probably were, because we have no regrets about them and say our two mortgage/no jobs was the best thing we've ever done.

We could all tell you stories, but yours is the one that matters in terms of making a decision about your lie. It's hard to tell how big of a change you are talking about or what kind of pros and cons you may be weighing. Change is uncomfortable. It is a stressful time even if it is change for the better. Just because it is change. No one can guarantee you will be successul in a new profession, but no one can give you a guarantee you will be successful and happy if you don't make the switch either. There really are no guarantees in life -- except that if you don't try, you won't succeed.

My life has taught me that there is great truth to the saying that the saddest words are "What if?" Fear of failure can also be a powerful motivator.

I guess for every good luck story, there's a bad luck story. Whatever you choose, I hope that it does work out for you!

Change is what you make it. Bad luck can find you running, climbing or sitting still -- and you can create your own by being afraid of doing the things you know in your heart you need to do.

Three time I wanted to "change my life" for the better and took big professional risks. All three times it was a disaster. My life did change for the better each time, but it was the picking up of the pieces that caused the improvement. I am a firm believer in the theory that if it doesn't feel right in your gut, if you have a nagging feeling that it is too risky, IT IS! The worst thing about what happened when I took those professional risks, is that it was just a HUGE waste of time and energy because of the time invested in moving and learning the ropes of a new job, which all went to waste since I ended up moving again after the jobs didn't pan out.

The first time I took a risk on a job because I really wanted to live and work in the area, but the folks I would be working with just didn't seem that great. I figured the other aspects would counteract that factor. Boy was I wrong! But I did learn something. I learned that one should NEVER underestimate the importance of the quality of the CHARACTER of the people one is working for. A prospective employer checks your references and wants to vet your character, which makes sense, and you should do the same. If they balk at that idea, it's a red flag! If someone tells you your future boss is "intense" and that's the best they can say, it is a red flag! I was young at the time and it was a great learning experience for me about professionalism and the interplay between focusing on doing your job well, and people of both good and bad character you will come across as you do that. I thought those TV shows where some nefarious person tries to sabotage someone professionally were gross exaggerations. I thought that behavior only happened on bad TV soaps! Sadly not. But I also learned how to persevere professionally under difficult circumstances, so that risk was not a complete waste.

The second time I took a risk, well I checked that one out and vetted that one, and I was TOTALLY misled about the job. I made a silk purse out of situation after that disaster occurred, by taking a second road I had been considering, which was going to graduate school. So had that job risk not worked out, I would have never gone to graduate school and graduate school opened up a whole new career world for me. But the risky job WASTED so much time in moving, finding an apartment, and then having the move again. Just a complete drain on one's life and a waste. So I would not recommend taking a risk that requires a move also unless I was young and had very few possessions.

The third time, I just had a gut feeling that the woman who was going to be my boss was a little "off" because she kept dissing her staff and telling me the place was stagnating and it was her staff's fault. Frankly I didn't see any problems there and the staff seemed OK to me, but I just thought, "OK, the boss is kind of a 'Debbie Downer' but the job is good and the rest seems like a no-brainer so I can deal with the negatives." There were a lot of possibilities in that job, and I needed a job, so I just ignored that little voice in the back of my head. I don't even want to remember back on what a complete drain on my life dealing with all that negativity was, but anyway, I learned from that one that no matter how hard you try to counteract them, negative people do drain you, so if you can limit your exposure to them, do it. I often now feel like I am 50 lbs. lighter not having to carry around all that dread. I broke my own rule and skipped the boss-vetting on that one too, so I still recommend it every time when evaluating a risk.

Bottom line for me it, if the job is boring or "safe" or even difficult, but does not drain you because there are no soul-crushing people you have to interact with every day, then the "safe" choice will leave you with the time and energy to create the growth that the "risky" job promised. One does GROW as a result of taking risks and failing, if one puts one's mind to it. Sort of like what happens when you "hard prune" a bush or plant, meaning you cut it way back. A lot of them bounce back stronger than ever with new growth. But some die. One can also GRADUALLY prune a plant or shrub, and that can also foster health and growth too. Neither is a sure bet, but I wouldn't take a risk nowdays unless I had a rock solid "Plan B" to turn to if it went sour. Tibbrix is right, now that I am older, I go more for gentle pruning rather than a hard shock. I don't have the time to waste totally re-grouping.

^ thanks for reminding us of the value of not wasting time.

Years ago I was a financially drained single parent of a child entering college, out of work but well positioned to return to school for an advanced degree. I was stuck for quite a while, though, paralyzed by fear of taking on huge student loan debt without a guarantee of success. After many months of agonizing, it finally occurred to me that I was never going to "know" the outcome and if I would be ok, but instead had to take a leap of faith and trust that somehow it would work out. That one shift in my thinking allowed me to move forward. It was life changing, and I've never regretted it.

I always weigh potential regrets. Will I look back on my life and regret not TRYING something new, or will I look back and see that when I took that risk, whether it worked out as I'd planned or not, it was worth it. And, of course, if it works out well for you, the rewards will be great and you'll have no regrets!

If you take the risk for something new and it doesn't suit you, what would stop you from moving back into the safer choices? Nothing is forever, one move isn't necessarily your last one, last chance; you just can't approach it as do or die, but rather as a try.

We all have different ideas of what a risk is and there are so many parts to a risk that it's hard to decide what is and what is not a risk.

I have traveled alone and for me there is no absolutely no downside to that but for others it is something they would never contemplate. I went into faculty where less than 10% of the students were female. For some women they would never do that but for me there was no downside.

My biggest risk was becoming a SAHM. Could we afford it (yes - but we would be giving up a very "rich" lifestyle and was it worth it), would I be happy, was it best for the kids and family, etc.

Risk takes many forms and only you can identify what part of the risk is giving you the most pause and how you feel about that.

I also moved several states away for a graduate program. No regrets there. It was a great experience, but I had a great advisor who I was made sure to vet. Grad programs can be a bit of hell, so the advisor makes a huge difference. She's still a great mentor and colleague. I also was single with no pets or kids and moved with what fit in my car. But it was very different being 500 miles from my friends and family. I wound up staying in that location for 12 years until I moved in with DH after we got married. I've been in my current job since then.

I work with great people, and that makes a difference. My pay stinks, and my benefits are so-so. Now, would I move again for another opportunity and certainly for more money. DH and I have discussed this, but it would need to be the right one. Yes, I would seriously consider something else. I don't know if I can make myself a new job. I have some interests and avenues but am not sure if these can really work, but I am always thinking of that! You know, the "turn your hobbies and interests into a job" thing. I am way too young to retire and probably need to work 15 more years assuming good health. I certainly can stay where I am for 15 more years; my job isn't going anywhere right now. There are only minor opportunities for advancement.

Making choices about health related problems I have also started to use the "least regrets" decision making process which is a little more conservative than my usual spontaneity based process. Which path would cause me the least regrets if it didn't work out? That's the one I chose. As I say it's very conservative and I think best suited for major/potentially life altering decisions.

One of the biggest risks I took was quitting a great job in Wash DC to follow my then boyfriend to Hawaii. We had met and dated briefly after he graduated from the Naval Academy before the Navy took him to San Diego. We broke up b/c I had no interest in long distance dating. Three years later our paths crossed again when he got transferred to the East Coast. As he was traveling to his new job in Maine, he passed through town, he called me up after not seeing each other in three years and we went on a date. Dated for six months long distance (he in Maine, I in DC). When the Navy took him to Hawaii, I decided that the only way to know for sure if we were meant to be together was to live in the same place and what could be more exciting than a move to Hawaii (I was in my mid-20s and not yet well-established in my career). I moved to Hawaii, got a temporary job, my own place and stayed for six months until he got transferred back to the East Coast, but not before proposing to me on the beach a week before we left. Fortunately, a position was available back in DC at my old company when we moved back east. The risk was worth it... 20 years later we are happily married with four kids.

I have taken plenty of risks and they have all been worth it because, with every situation, I have grown, learned more about myself and have bettered the relationships with those who have helped in the process.

the types of risks don't matter so much. My growth - matters lots!

My struggles always seem to come down to following my head or my heart. Sigh, I need to learn to follow my heart. But any decision will have unexpected gifts if you are open to them.

Wouldn't it be nice if life came with guarantees? But where's the fun in that?

Can you take the "safe option" while freelancing in the new profession? Sort of dip your toes in to see how it goes before diving in? Are there any mentors in the new profession from whose experience you could benefit and who could help you calculate the risk?

When you say "it will be personally uncomfortable if it doesn't work out", are you talking about a bruised ego? I don't think fear of failure should stop you from pursuing a reasonable and well-considered path.

Good luck and trust your instincts!

I think it's good to take risks, especially if the "cost is relatively low". I quit my career when kids came along. Scary, but completely with it!

DH worked for a great company. It was located in his home town. Several generations of his family retired from this company. We actually met there. Needless to say, it was a great place to work.

However, DH was told that he was their best employee (in his department) but there is no room for promotion. So he moved to a different department where he could move up in management. He hated the new work. His first task was to fire about 30% of the group for downsizing. Beyond that the day-to-day was miserable. He started looking elsewhere and was offered a good job in another state.

He took the job, and we moved with a toddler and second baby on the way. We missed being close to family terribly, but the job was great.

He worked there for about a year and a half when the original company he worked for called to say there was reorganizing and they wanted to offer him a job that was a few steps up the ladder! We truly believe that if he never took the job where he had to fire 30% (miserable), then he wouldn't have been offered to out of state job, and he never would of been offered the job to come back! All the risk paid off, even though there were many bumps along the way.

Good luck!

I would say, don't go looking for something if you need a "guarantee". There are no guarantees on anything. The best we can do is to try to estimate the benefits and risks, your tolerance for the known risks, and also for the unexpected. You won't know until you try.

I have taken a few. The first what when I was 18. I went down to join the Army Reserves, and ended up signing up for regular Army, because I thought I would live in Philly for the rest of my life. I was, essentially, running away from home, not because it was terrible, but because I wanted to know more. Turned out to be the best decision, but the first 6 months was hard. The benefits almost covered the last two years of college (I already had two years before I entered), and learning how to deal with people was invaluable.

Next was when I was downsized (partially my choice, it was me or someone with a family), after 24 years. I didn't know what I would do next, so I took some time off. A friend (who was on the interview team for the job I was downsized from) had moved to another company, and she recommended me. That is where I am now, it isn't what I really want to do, but it pays the bills, and I am within single-digit years before I retire (again).

In the meantime, I am working to grow my business as an officiant/Life-Cycle Celebrant, and I also work part time as an instructor. This will be what I do when I leave corporate life. Still scary, but I like this a lot, and have an excellent support system from peers.

Best wishes! I have more regrets from things that I did not do (e. g., stay in the military for 20 years), than the choices that I have made.

When you come to a fork in the road, take it! That's a Yogi Berra quote, and I find it works every single time. Another favorite quote about decision-making is that no decision IS a decision.

Yes, I have taken a couple of risks and both times they worked out very well for me. The first was to go back to school for my engineering degree when I was 32. I had been turning this around in my mind for a couple of years before pulling the trigger. This was back in the 70's when women were still much a minority (still are) in the field. Classes were small at our local university and I elected to go back and brush up on college algebra even though I technically didn't have to. Best decisions I ever made. I finished in 3 years (I already had a degree so didn't have to go the full route with electives) and worked part time the last two by co-op'ing with my same employer. So it was a bit of a stretch for us at the time but not bad with a reduced paycheck. The only 'failure' was not doing it sooner.

The second was a job change about 5 years later. I was in a great job but was feeling the glass ceiling. I started applying for a few jobs with some other agencies. Got a call one day for an interview, was accepted (it was a great promotion) and I took it. A very senior individual I admired very much had recommended me for this job but I didn't find this out until after I was on the job. The first week I was wondering what the heck I was doing, but after that it was smooth sailing and I excelled, received 2 more promotions, and retired from the Government 14 years later.

I've taken a lot of risks with my life and career. I also work in a field that is "risky" in that it isn't that "safe"--the pay is low, and a lot of jobs dry up and there is big turnover as folks burn out. I've seen a lot of folks come and go professionally, so I would advise you to think carefully about what the risks really are in a job offer. Some places will sell you a song and dance about how exciting and "cutting edge" your job will be, and in reality, they are hanging by a thread financially and when the time comes, first hired, first cut. Does the job you are being offered have a history of constant turn over? If so, why? Do you have the stomach for what it might take to stick with it? For example, I once got a job offer at a place that had just gone through an awful, awful financial crisis and staff turnover. But the new guy they had hired to be in charge inspired in me a strong feeling of real confidence. So I made the decision based on that, and I have no regrets. To me, that one really wasn't that risky, but others on the outside might have seen it as such. Turned out to be the toughest yet best job I ever had.

Creative, risk-taking folks will often hire someone out of the blue, maybe someone low on experience but high on naive enthusiasm. They will let you go just as impetuously, so watch out for that. If it sounds to good to be true, it probably is. I wouldn't recommend moving across country for a risky job if I had a home and a lot of belongings. A friend and I both took "jobs of a lifetime" to move back home from out East at about the same time, and in both cases it didn't pan out. Luckily, we both rented out our houses instead of selling them so we were able to push the "reset" button much more easily than if we had put all our eggs in the risky basket. So think about that aspect and come up with a plan for how you could handle that risk.

When analyzing risk, IMHO, the biggest risks are with the team of folks you will be working with. Are they committed to you? If not, can you deal with that? Folks in stable work environments often are much more committed to each other than the high turnover professions. Always have a plan B, but dedicate yourself to plan A. Twice now I have quit jobs without having one to go to, which is a risky situation. But I evaluated the "cost" of staying, and I realized that the opportunities, reputation and time lost staying with those unprofessional organizations was too high a price to pay for the steady pay check. No matter what, I realized that in the long run I would be better cutting my losses. Both times everyone around me said it was "too risky" to quit a job without having one to go to. But having followed the course of the jobs I quit, I know for sure it was the right decision. Don't turn down a "risky" job because it is unconventional, but do turn down a great job offer if you don't feel a strong sense that you want to be part of the team offering you the job. Check out references for other folks who have worked for and with the team offering you the risky job. Or if you don't care about the team and want to go "lone wolf" then make sure you are up for the journey!

In today's day and age, professional growth is always a good thing! I would say anything that promotes professional growth is a good risk, but that's not the same as evaluating a job offer. Be realistic about what you and the organization you would be working for can accomplish. Just make sure to look beyond the hype before you leap. Better IMHO to think about where you are in terms of professional growth instead of risks in jobs. I always try to keep my eye on where I am professionally--am I being creative, learning new things, feeling positive about going to work every day? If not, then whatever I can do to change that situation, I am going to give it a try! In that case, whatever the outcome, I have practically nothing to lose and much to gain. If the risky job doesn't pan out, you can still pursue the growth you desire along another channel that will open up.

Success is not guaranteed and failure is not fatal. This has been my mantra for many years and I can't remember where I first read it.

In my 62 years I have been a young bride, a SAHM, a forty year old married woman starting nursing school, a youngish 41 year old widowed nursing student with three children to provide for. I later remarried and was a school nurse at the time. My new DH asked me to work a summer vacation at organizing a newly acquired business of his. That led to me actually running and managing that business for eight and a half years. We got an offer we couldn't refuse for both the business I managed, and our other business that was DH's life work. Within 3 months I had another business planned for and opened my shop for business several months later. Last September I sold that business and am now fully retired and busier than ever.

I do think that failure is not taking a chance or a risk. In the end even if you haven't totally succeeded you have gained the knowledge of what you could have done better.

IT seems like the common thread here is attitude makes the difference. If you want guarantees, are afraid of wasting time or afraid of failure, taking risks is more likely to be negative. If you see that not deciding is still deciding, see disappointments as learning opportunities or curves in the road nad are generally ready and willing to make the best of things, risks seem worth taking -- and just a part of life.

I was out of commission for a few days and returned here to find these wonderful stories and words of advice. Thank you, everyone. Really--I appreciate the time you took to share.

The benefit I have is that my current position will limp along for a while. Not at 100% pay (in fact, about 1/3 of what I've made in the past). I'm applying for "safe" positions in my field for which I'm qualified but for which there is a lot of competition.

At the same time, I'm shooting for the stars in striking out on my own and trying something new. It's unfamiliar territory and requires that I reach out and sell myself. I'll face a lot of rejection and I'm preparing for this. I've got strategic milestones I want to reach and have factored in the rejection component.

I know this doesn't seem like much of a risk compared to what many of you described above. But the level at which I'll have to put myself out there sometimes thrills me but most times makes me nauseous (literally). I am not an inherent risk taker.

I feel like I'm leaving it up to fate. If I secure one of the "safe" positions, my decision is made. I don't want to regret though trying the latter and so I think that's the overall message I'm taking away from your stories. I'll never know unless I try.

You can certainly try striking out on your own and leaving all the feelers out there for something safe. You don't have to burn bridges. One thing you often find though is that taking that less certain step leads to something you wouldn't have considered, expected or imagined. That can beat both of the options you've been considering.

While my sons were in school, I often found myself in fundraising or other positions that required me to go out and ask people for help or donations. So many people would never do it -- say they couldn't. Sometimes it was hard to get started, but I found that if I just accepted that not everyone was going to say yes and that I could still meet them, tell them about our need and thank them for talking with me -- even wishing them luck with their challenges when they told me why they had to decline, it was the rare one who would be rude or really irritate me. We also broke things down to try to make both efforts and donations of all sizes count -- letting people know even small contributios are needed, it was easier for people to say yes. Even when people declined, I usually felt positive about the experience. It was usually friendly and if it wasn't, I knew I was positive and that was one I didn't have to waste any more time on.

So how do you apply that to a business? Same principles apply. You have to build a network and a reputation and you do it through contacts as well as work. Leave cards, build a website, have a Facebook presence or whatever fits the situation. Put yourself out there not just as a hard sell but also for the referrals and in the future. Appreciate the small jobs and the contacts. Make then count so they can bring larger ones and good referrals.

It takes time to strike out on your own. If that is your risk taking, build in some cushions before you leap. Have savings to fall back on -- your income may drop before it rises. Make sure you have medical covered one way or another. Perhaps line up at least one or two clients or projects before you jump. Build a plan and make it conservative. When the conservative plan looks like it can work, then you work like heck to make it work, stretch, and go for the dream. Defining, qualifying and quantifying your risks make them manageable and, at least for me, makes the difference between taking a risk and being fool hardy.

But leaving it up to fate is not taking the risk - that's either being safe and hoping you don't have regrets or being forced to jump and possibly without a parachute. That's playing the extremes. That seems like the hardest way to make either experience really fruitful. Is that what you want?

Hi Lisa,

Your approach makes sense to me, and thanks for sharing some details. It's also fascinating to read about other people's risks - which apparently they have all survived, woot!

I took a semi-blind leap in leaving my job 2.5 years ago. I'll echo what Lascatx said: risk-taking is a lot easier when your financial solvency and medical coverage are not at stake. Assuming you have some financial buffer, then risk doesn't feel reckless.

In my case, I stuck with my same field but went freelance and left the safety of a very well-known employer with awesome benefits. I am an optimistic, resilient person and this has sometimes served me well, sometimes not. Rejection is tough. I was not prepared for that. I've had two dark periods where my prospects looked pretty dim and ergo, my self worth suffered.

But I've gained so much. Mostly I've learned a ton about what I actually want and spent lots of energy honing what I want to be good at. And there's no one but me standing in the way, so off I went to see what I could create. I have never enjoyed my working life so much as I am now. I really appreciate having and doing work, especially since I know how hard it is to get it. I often wake up on Monday mornings thinking, "Oh yay, I get to work today!"

Another cool thing is I get to own my successes and my failures. Of course the failures suck, but the successes are terrifically fun! I also get to manage my own schedule, for the most part, and it lets me prioritize in a way that's right for me. For example, I play very hard. Harder than I work, in fact. So I can balance my work load in ways that allow for this. And it's up to me to suck up the financial issues that come with not working a steady 40 hrs a week. But again, that's my choice and its nice to own that.

Lastly, I have time and energy to branch out in interesting ways. While my work or more or less clustered around two themes (science and skiing), I can take forays into new avenues. That's been lots of fun because I get to pursue ideas that had been kicking around in the back of my head. Why not? I'm learning to limit how much unpaid time I put into various prospects, but I've learned something from every effort. I'm still not earning as much money as I was, but I'm okay with that. I'm generally having a great time and am proud of what I'm doing.

It sounds like you are keeping a healthy perspective on your options. You have good choices in front of you and you're being level-headed about it. All of these things set you up well for risk-taking, should you want that.

Good luck! I'll look forward to hearing more about it as it unfolds.

Thank you, Lascatx and Karin_mt, for your added input here. I've noted points that each of you have made in career-related posts in the past and I appreciate what you offer here in this one. There really is no one but me standing in my way.

I think when we're younger, the idea or task of making career changes large and small comes much easier and as we grow older the scarier it might seem.. I love change and had no problems changing directions when I was in my 20's and 30's but once the 40's hit and the job market as a whole started changing, my perspective slowly changed with it. Now I'm in my 50's and find the idea of a career change a tad bit more challenging (though still doable).

In the early to mid 90's I worked in loan originations (mortgages) for a very large credit union.. There were a lot of engineers getting laid off and their job market had essentially dried up. The CU was trying to come up with creative ways to help the misplaced employees so they wouldn't loose their homes. What I witnessed while counseling them is that the biggest successes and happiest outcomes were from those who took that leap of faith to go down a different path. Two years after one of the major layoffs, a very large percentage of the members said that they were much happier working in their new careers. Their successes really taught me that with some hard work and a little creativity, the possibilities really are endless. For those that weren't as fortunate, it appeared that their biggest road block was their own negative psyche.

My risk: wanted a light and black tile configuration. Went for light and gray and achieved the desired effect. Black would have been too dark/harsh. Whew!