Really disliking my foyer light
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8 years ago
last modified: 8 years ago
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OutsidePlaying
8 years agoingrid_vc so. CA zone 9
8 years agoRelated Discussions
How large a light for Foyer Lighting - Updated
Comments (5)Just about any chandelier, semi-flush mount of flush-mount light will work there. You don't need much light in a foyer, since it is not a work or living space, so really the only factor is sizing it so it doesn't look too small or too large for the space. I'd probably go with a medium-sized chandelier for that space, one about 2 feet in diameter and hanging down about 2-3 feet; I'd also put it on a dimmer if it will be on for any significant amount of the day. But that's just me. Go with what looks good to you....See MoreWhere does the light belong in my foyer?
Comments (9)In front of the closet You could do a flushmount or a semi-flush which I think are more interesting in their detail. If you decide a semi-flush check your closet/pr door clearances as they go into the hallway. As one ages (like me) your eyes require more light which is why I suggested a light in front of the closet. It helps finding that misplaced shoe and helps your guests find their coats/scarves etc. You could put it on a separate circuit from the front entrance lighting. Your front entrance lighting (sconces are a cool idea but again watch your front door swing into those side walls) would be your ambient, welcome-to-my-home lighting and so a hanging light would give you that. A table with a lamp could be presented as a little personal vignette - a table with a little chair, lamp, a little picture, basket for keys (if this is also the entrance for the family), a mirror on the side wall of the PR which could be a double use for a last-minute check before you leave and would help to bounce light around....See MoreCan this light work in my foyer?
Comments (4)A very fun light, but something that would strike me as designed for over a table, not as an entry chandy. I think you want something that would provide some light for the whole space, above and below the fixture. The placement of the chandy in the similar house you posted is very odd. It would appear to be hung way too high....See Moredislike stepson - need help to save my marriage
Comments (13)Ok...I don't have teenagers (yet!) and after reading this I might lock them in closets between 13 & 18 (just kidding *LOL*) but truthfully. I've worked with teenagers and agree that some of this is just where they are emotionally (if you remember - it was an awkward time!), some of this is his issues with his parenting (mom leaving, dad making little to no effort), part of this is his testing your love for him. (Ever read the children's book "mama do you love me?" it is all about that test of love for children.) But part of me thinks that you have allowed a level of disrespect from him in the past 4 years and still given him things that please him. Children have the ability to change their behavior parent-according. Like Alstep's SK knowing that dad is a marine who would never tolerate such behavior. I'm strict so my SS(s) pull less with me than with other parental figures (BM, Grandparents...etc.) It is hard to correct behavior that probably should have been nipped in the bud years ago but I would still try. I agree with all the previous posts in that aspect. He is not a lost cause. Most importantly, however, is exactly what others have said. Your DH needs to step up and instead of thinking "this is magically going to change when SS leaves" you need to be thinking "this needs to change now." This is not going to sound very nice but DH's "let you deal it" attitude is a form of disrespect as well. After all - this is HIS biological child - it is MORE his problem than yours (that is not to say that you didn't sign-on as a mom when you married a full custodial parent but I really feel like DH was burnt out on being a dad so when you came into the picture he used you as his vacation from parenting.) I've seen this behavior before. Knowing that you will step up and do what needs to be done has taken a weight off of him (and unjustly put it on you!) And you have allowed it (while secretly brewing resentment and frustration for the past 4 years since you unknowingly volunteered to be a single parent in a marriage.) You need to talk to DH and let him know that parenting needs to be a SHARED adventure (which is sometimes a shared headache!) You may see better results with a counselor because things that are "objective" coming from a third party are "personal" coming from your spouse. Although you have put all of this stress and frustration on your SS ("I hate him"), it is not REALLY about him or his behaviors. It is about the fact that you feel alone in a no-win situation and would like a little help from the other parent in your home. You, and every parent on the planet (biological, step or adoptive) needs respite! Respite can come in the form of what I call "daddy duty" when I just NEED to sleep in, be alone in a store, or have a "girls night out" (we've obviously got littler ones.) It is joint-parenting. I'm very fortunate that my DH and I agree on discipline and that he is very intuitive to my needs. He seems to know when I'm being pushed to the brink and he steps up to relieve me saying "I've got it this time". You are lucky that you are married (I don't know how single parents do it!) You need to UNITE with your spouse and decide how you are going to handle this situation TOGETHER. It is not fair that you probably feel like a single mom who never even gave birth. (My DH is great but I've felt that way myself. Luckily, when I voiced it, he was receptive to it but he wasn't always as instinctive as he is now!) You MAY be frustrated with your SS's behavior but he is NOT the center of this problem. And won't it suck when he leaves in three years and the problem doesn't go with him! Has dad ever given him just dad-son time? It seems to me that this boy is crying out to be acknowledged by his father. He is becoming a man and wants to know how. Your DH needs to show you more respect by stepping up to his responsibilities as an example to his son. If Dad doesn't take on responsibility and doesn't show you respect, why should he? SS could also be anticipating the destruction of a marriage here (he doesn't need to know that you don't make love to know something isn't right!) Maybe your DH could discuss having a weekend fishing trip (or something) with just he and SS but that SS has to earn it by following the rules, doing his homework, and being respectful. There HAS to be something that SS does "care" about. Has DH ever sat down and talked to SS about what he is so down about? Can you level with him at all?...See MoreDYH
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