Oh man YES. I had to repeatedly remind myself that we CHOSE to sell first. I still think it was the best way to go but it stunk. No 2 ways about it. It was 10 months in an old home on a very loud and busy street with no dishwasher, no air and one bathroom and no garage during the worst winter in over 30 years. The well was so bad that you could not shower, wash dishes and do laundry at one time. In fact you could only do 1 of those things and we had 2 boys in sports! It was at month 2 when I turned the faucet on to fill a pan with water and brown came out I had it! So they did put a new well in finally but it was still not pleasant. Did I mention those little lady bug things were everywhere? I would fill the sink to wash dishes and they would get in the water while I was washing. Totally CREEPED OUT! Kitchen had no vent fan and no light above the stove-black painted cabinets and red walls. I did set the smoke detectors off more than once and had to put up one of those puck lights just to see what I was cooking! I told my husband it was an assault on all of your senses, depressing! It was dark, loud, damp, cold and smelled old! We made good use of the sound machine mentioned above. We already owned it because dh worked midnights for a while. I didn't sleep for about a month off and on-Tylenol PM was my friend. Semi's would shake the house. You could not even hear the tv when traffic went by, the living room was the lightest (most windows), loudest and coldest room. The day we received occupancy I walked out with the kids and the coffee pot, literally. We slept at the new house for a couple nights and I gathered myself up to go back and actually start moving boxes and I could not believe the marked difference in feeling when I walked in to that dark kitchen. It truly was like a cave. Our new house has so many windows-love the light. There were not many or any other options where we lived to keep the kids near school and it was totally no lease, month to month. That I know was worth a lot but it was quite miserable indeed. We made it though and you will too. Battle scars I tell ya! Hang in there. This post was edited by Autumn.4 on Fri, Jul 18, 14 at 19:40

Alright, this last visit I followed some of your suggestions (and we saved up $$to have for spending on this trip). I packed a bag of groceries to bring along and bought more while there with the other woman. I made dinner once while she was at work. We got chicken and potatoes to toss on the grill another night. She asked her husband to grill the chicken and I found him googling "how to grill chicken." I didn't say anything then but my husband and I giggled about it in bed that night. I also offered to make scalloped potatoes and ham another night and the husband said he would rather get pizza (again) because he "had to eat that nasty stuff when he was growing up." More giggles from DH and I. DH loves my scalloped potatoes and ham! So it worked out ok. Some meals out, some meals in.

Wow - lots going on here, but in response to your reason for posting . . . . I can understand how exhausting it can be to deal with a roller coaster relationship with a birth mom - I've been on that ride for 10 years. I've been the one she wants to talk to because my DH is an "a$$", and then suddenly been 'your b!tch of a wife' whom she won't even say hello to. I used to beat myself up trying be 'friends' and keep the peace. We are now at the best place in our relationship we have ever been at, but I still wait for the other shoe to drop. Truly, if you love your SD, you have to let it go. You have to understand that her trying to make you miserable stems from feeling miserable herself. It's harder then many can imagine, but you have to find a way to rise above it. I don't mean to look down at her with pity over her miserable existence, but to remember that when she gets nutty that there is something in her life making her so unhappy that you feel the brunt of it. Then list 5 things to yourself that make you happy about your life, and don't let her nuttiness take those things away from you. Chances are you will never be friends in the sense of the word we all think of. But, you can be civil. If you open the door into your life by inviting her to the lake and such, though a wonderful gesture, it only gives her a way to slam the door in your face. Keep civil, but keep her at a distance. If you maintain that distance she knows what to expect. When she tries to be 'friends' just be polite, keep the conversation to a minimum and the contact minimal. When she tries to be nasty do the same. If she sees that her behavior does not ruffle you, she'll look for someone else to make miserable. Remember, misery loves company. My biggest piece of advice - don't say "we're through trying to be friends with you just don't say anything to us and we'll say nothing to you." You are then letting her know you're affected by her. Instead, say nothing. Be civil. Be consistent. Take the high road. As a side note, never let yourself or your husband be bated into discussing anything other than the weather in front of your SD. A nice response to keep in your back pocket is "I would like to hear more of what you have to say at a later, more appropriate time. Please call or email me." Then walk away. If exchanges can get nasty, do them in a very public place. Or better yet, a police station.

Thanks, JMCK, good to know. I read that CT and RI are the only two states with a 2 week record of declining cases. 1929, It's so hard to guess. If we hadn't un-flattened the curve, id say they'd be opening up to the US at the same as the EU/Schengen. The holiday itinerary I am looking at is 100% cancellable and refundable in re hotels if i cancel before 11/26 for the Kitzbuhel hotel and 12/7 for the Vienna Air BnB. That's pretty worry free. The flight with BA would be exchangeable for a voucher good thru April 2021; pretty darn sure we'd use that. And if you can't go because *they* cancel the flight, by law you get a cash refund. What are the cancellation policies if you use miles? From what I've read they keep changing and vary quite a bit from airline to airline. Since it is so unpredictable, id only book if I could cancel and be satisfied with those terms. Texanjana, bummer about your trips. And totally jelly in re Egypt! My one DD wants to go there in the worst way and DH thinks its unsafe. Fingers crossed you get to go, and do tell us all about it!