My grandma taught my Mom who repeated it to me, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all!" and... "If you look hard enough, you can find some good in every one." My Grandma (her pet name for me was "Obbie"...for some reason, I didn't pronouce "Grandma" and "Awe-bee" was the name she answered to when I was a small child. Even her neighbors & lots of friends called her "Obbie" throughout the years of my growing up. She was a "hired girl" on farms when she was a teenager...she was married and divorced at a young age...she was widowed after another marriage to my grandpa of 26 yrs...she worked in a bakery, she operated a cafe, she ironed clothes in her home for other families...she was always a HARD worker!...she passed that on to her 3 daughters & family. Here are some of my precious memories of my Grandma, Obbie that I wrote back in 1984 for a genealogy book my Mom created: In the back yard, Obbie had lots of flower gardens. I once found the cactus garden with my bare feet when I jumped a fence playing (where I shouldn't have been)! There were also lots of sour grapes, good ripe strawbeeries and lots of green apples. We were never without homegrown food at Obbie's. And, oh, that homemade jar of strawberry jam. Of course, inside the house, there were always homemade chocolate chip cookies. And on Sundays, the smell of Obbie frying chicken (that my 'grandpa butchered). Anyone was welcome to show up for Sunday dinner! Obbie taught me a few of the things every woman was supposed to know before growing up. The ol' treadle sewing machine put out lots of doll clothes and pin cushions. Crocheting chain stitches (by the miles). Obbie crocheted each grandchild an afghan for graduation. Never being bored at Obbie's, there were always old catalogs for cutting out paper dolls and clothes. (Ok, Gjers, I could go on & on...but I just want you to know that I was very blessed...I was a "crouper" as a child and finally outgrew it at 12 yrs. old...but my Obbie would always come running when I got sick...with "warm 7-up" and hugs. Anyway, I will end this post with a poem I wrote for this genealogy book (she died when my first grandchild was 4 mos. old): "My grandma, Obbie, always had time for her grandchildren. She was never too busy to forget us. I am the lucky one even to have had Obbie for my grandma... If I can be as strong, as you were strong, If I can give, as you have given, If I can be kind, as you always were kind, If I am loved, as you are loved, If I am cherised, as you are cherished, If I am mourned, as you are mourned, Then I can say..my life is truly blessed. Obbie passed on her love for gardening & flowers to me...as my grandpa did also...and my Dad. Here is a pic that I am so fortunate to have of my Grandma holding me in her backyard...I lived in the same household the first 2 yrs. of my life...and her LOVE shaped my life. Ahhh, pretty sentimental stuff...but I enjoyed all of your sharing and wanted to share a bit of this special lady! Thanks, Jeanne S.

Using a car or walking harness is a excellent idea. Many can serve as both a walking harness and a car restraint harness. I have two. The first I bought about twelve years ago from Petsmart. It was called the Canine Car something. Last month I bought another harness, this one was for my current dog and was a bit fancier. Brand name Fugo, or Furgo, something like that. Model was a close out at Petco. Costs were $16 and $30 as I recall. If you drive with a dog you have the responsibility of making sure the animal(s) is secure. Read about a case in a dog magazine a year or so ago. Driver with unsecured dog was groping for a dropped cell phone (or something similar). The vehicle struck another vehicle head on. The dog went thru its vehicle, thru the other windshield, and stuck and killed the driver. The first driver is serving a period in prison. I assume for some form of manslaughter, but there could have been DWI, or other charge.

Talley-Sue - yes, it was gaping. Kathy was in no condition to assess her wounds for a couple of days. She is fairly big breasted and only found the wound when she was able to take a bath a few days later. I would say the wound is about the size of a dollar coin. I even missed it when she first showed me her chest bruising but I wasn't looking that closely at her breasts just the bruising. The wound is under the breast on the outside. It actually looks like a bullet hole not that I have ever seen an actual bullet hole in someone's body. She is still finding bruises that she didn't know she had. Kathy did call her Doctor right away but like everything else you have to wait for an appointment which was today. Kathy did tend to her wounds like a nurse would do and she had a fellow nurse come and check her out. She wasn't mortally wounded so she waited to see her doctor. Kathy went to her family doctor today - he had all the reports from the hospital and he noted again where all of her injuries and bruising was. She has to go back again next week. I went with her to do some errands today and I could tell Kathy was in pain and asked her where she was feeling it the most. She said her breast and wearing a seatbelt wasn't helping any either. She said she might have to start taking a Percocet during the daytime too because of the pain. One good thing she wasn't skittish behind the wheel of the rental car. She is a little more wary of the other drivers though. We weren't out for more than a couple of hours and she had to get home because she was exhausted. Kathy has nothing but good to say about the people at the hospital and the EMT and police and good samaritans that were on the scene. If I was her I would probably be moaning and groaning but Kathy is not doing that and she is allowing us to help her. Kathy's insurance company has the police report but when she goes to see the lawyer I am sure he will get a copy. Anne

"I was in passenger seat. We had a minor accident at an intersection, he braked HARD and even though I was belted, my hands instinctively reached out, They hit the dash so hard I broke both thumbs. That could have been my head! So I've worn my seat belt every ride since then." One night more than 30 years ago I was being given a ride to my car, which was parked on the upper level of a parking garage. It was late, it was dark out, and I didn't feel safe going up there alone, so one of the guys in the building where we worked offered to give me a ride. Because we were going to be within the parking structure and not out on the street, and because the ride would only take a few minutes, I didn't put the seat belt on. Lee normally drove a Porsche, but it was in the shop, so he had his "backup" car -- a 1968 (or was it a 1969?) Cadillac Brougham. HUGE difference in the size and maneuverability of those two cars! Anyway, at one point we had to make a U-turn to go up a long ramp to the next level, and as he was coming out of the turn Lee "gunned it" to go up the ramp. Problem was, he was used to making a nice tight little turn in the Porsche, and when he accelerated, he wasn't aimed straight. I knew we were going to scrape the wall and, like Jannie, I made an instinctive move -- my purse was on my lap so I held onto it with my right hand, and I put my left hand out against the dash to brace myself. Well, we didn't just "scrape" that concrete wall -- we slammed into it. Because of the way Lee had made the turn, we ran into the wall with the impact being on the right front (passenger side) of the car. Now, if you know anything at all about a '68 or '69 Cadillac Brougham, you'll know it is a huge, heavy, solid metal car. And the impact completely crumpled/crushed the right front fender. The right front tire wouldn't turn, and the passenger door wouldn't open. I had to crawl out through the driver's door. Because I hadn't been wearing a seat belt, there was nothing to hold me back when we hit the wall. I was thrown forward and hit my head on the frame of the windshield. Because my left arm was braced against the dash, my arm/shoulder were crunched into my neck. Long story short -- I received permanent injuries as a result. I had to have surgery to remove a rib because I was losing circulation to my left arm. I have vicious headaches, because the impact of my skull against the windshield frame dislocated part of my skull. I also now have bulging discs in my neck and back. Anyway, ever since then, I've worn my seat belt EVERY time I've gotten in a car -- even when all I'm doing is backing the car out of the garage onto the driveway to wash it.