Thank you Rose!
I've had my own demons to fight with family and I've already started to wish them well in life. Just because we have our differences doesn't mean I want to see them suffer.
Excellent advice and well worth the read.
I'd like to save a copy on my computer if you don't mind.
Cheers,
McPeg

Excellent article.
A lot of people hang on to the hate and
angry, not realizing they are still being controlled,
by their enemies, emotionally.

Enjoyed reading your enlightening article!

Donna (^_^)

Drop them, move on, and know they can never be trusted again. I don't hold the charges in my heart in the first place, so there is no hatred to fester. That's my motto and couldn't read so much after scrolling to see how much it was. Sorry to be critical when I know writing it was therapeutic for you. I just think people often clutter and complicate their own lives much more than outsiders ever could.

Rose, I read it and it is so true. We had something awful happen to us one time, and it took 15 months to resolve. I can honestly say that during that 15 months, there was not more than a few minutes that I wasn't focussed on it. It consumed me totally. It made me so sick that I even went to bed for 3 weeks. Part of the time, I was plotting revenge. And, I mean, some serious kind of stuff.

Finally, it was resolved and I came to the conclusion that this had already taken too much of my life. I put it behind me. I decided that the people who did this, weren't worth
killing. I have a good life. They have a miserable life. I would always be happy...I have that within me...and I would live in peace. They, on the other hand, had never had anything, and never would have anything. Better to let them live on...and run out their miserable lives.

Time has passed and all the people involved have either been sent to prison or have died from drug over doses. It took a long time to recoup financially. It cost us $60,000 and that was our nest egg.

I needed to get away from almost everyone. I moved here and I locked the gate. I don't usually answer the phone. I don't involve myself with people any more than I have to. So, of course, it changed me, but not in any way that I can't handle. I appreciate my friends who heard me out on this....talking about it helped, but now that it is past, I don't dwell on it any more. Sometimes I look back in amazement that such a thing could happen to us. I guess that's life.

What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. Thank you for your article.

It is good that I hardly ever think of it any more.

Excellent took the words right out of my mouth. I just sent it to my relatives
Thanks for posting it

Beautifully written.

Worth saving and sharing.

Congratulations on learning how to survive...!!

My son always says that life is choices.

You can choose to suffer or choose to live victorious.

Sounds like you choose to win !

patti

Rose, well done!

I learned several years ago how putting words on paper can untie those knots. Looking at our own written words is like looking into a mirror. We see things that even our best friends don't see, and we face them, one on one.

Keep writing, about good times, too. You will realize joys that you might have overlooked.

I think a person has to be brave to bare their innermost thoughts with a sometimes uncaring public. You have been brave to put this out there for the benefit of all of us.

Thank you.

Sue

Beautiful, wonderful, true, every bit of it. What is so sad to me is that by the time you learn these lessons a lot of times have gone by that are wasted b/c you did not understand and take to heart these lessons. It's a shame to me that we have to learn these "life lessons" the hard way. I'd like to spoon feed them to my children and grandchildren, but it doesn't work that way. I think that's one of the paradoxes of life. It's takes a while and some hard knocks before you "get it."

You have written volumes here and I thank you for sharing with everyone.

You have written an excellent article, and in the process you have freed yourself. For a long time now, one of my favorite thoughts has been" Forgiveness is not approval of the action. Forgiveness is releasing the action from controlling you." Too many people think forgiveness is about the other person only. I believe that it is more about ourselves. We should forgive for our own spiritual, mental and even physical health.

Your piece reminded me of the 9/11 World Trade Center disaster. Yes,evil men killed a lot of people, but then afterwards thpousands of people rushed to the scene to help. The good-doers greatly outnumbered the evil-doers. Thank you for sharing your article, Rosemary.

Wonderful, absolutely wonderful work Rose.

Jodi-

I love what you wrote! I will save it and reread it often. And, if you don't mind, I would like to share it with a select few.
I am glad you are in a happier place now.

Good advice. After a really bad family incident, I know that to just go on with my life, to forgive and forget, has helped me. You can't enjoy the fruits of life if your mouth is full of bitterness.

I had never heard that quote before, "to forgive is human, to forget is divine". Where is it from? I only had heard of this one, "To Err is Human, to Forgive Divine."
Clare

Rose, I soooooo needed to read what you wrote.

Thank you so much. You helped me more than you know.

Hugs,
Nicki

Nicki...I just posted on The MessageHouse for you to read this...

Rosemaryt...would you mind if I shared this with the MessageHouse?

I could not find a place to email you on your "my place"

patti

Patti,

What/where is TheMessageHouse? Is it something new?

Sue

Sue,
I think she meant the Meeting House b/c I posted over there about some things. :o(

Forgivemess is the scent of the violet on the shoe that crushed it,

I just copied and pasted this to a few people, Rosemary. Thank your for your insight. I hope it touches some hearts!

I did mean the Meeting house....

Somehow when it first got started I got Message House in my head and I just can't get it out...I call it that all the time....Drives me nuts...sorry...

Very well written, rose. And so very true. I appreciate the time and effort you put into this. Writing is wonderful therapy isn't it? Thank you so much for sharing. A copy of this goes into my keeper file.
Ron

Thank You Rose,i was trying to convey these same thoughts to my GD earlier today.She hasn't gotten along with her dad in years and harbours all these ill feeling towards him,because he wasn't there for her as she was growing up.I try to tell her she has to let them go as it's only dragging her down.May i copy and send her what you wrote,it may make a difference coming from someone besides me.Thanks for sharing.
kathi

That was great, Rose. I hope to put it into practice. Thanks for sharing it with us.

That is wondeful!!! I hope its ok to use it elsewhere. Our church teens have a monthly little newsletter with snippets of this and that and the girl that writes it would probably love to print it.

Rose,
I have a feeling this is going to be posted all over the world Do you want us to give you credit for it by name? maybe a little copyright symbol too? ©

"The copyright symbol -- © -- is what you need to place on your work.

You don't need to wait until you've filed your copyright application before you place the copyright symbol on your work. Click&Copyright has prepared several different graphics which our customers are free to use to quickly and easily provide notice that their work is registered with the United States Federal Government and 100% protected under U.S. Copyright Law"
from a website

Sounds like you and me have been down the same road. Good writing and people who have been thru this kind of thing can relate to every word you wrote. Life is too short to be spent miserable in bitterness.

Wow, thanks for all the kind words. Yes, I'd be grateful if WHEN it is reprinted, whomever puts my name with it and the copyright image. I paid dearly for this life lesson - financially, emotionally, and physically.

Rose Thornton

Rose I won't post it on another site unless you give me permission and I will do the copyright thing.

How do you do it on the computer?

patti

Rose-All I can say is AMEN ! I think there is not one of us who has not been down the road of being hurt or disappointed in someone in our lives. I took me a long time to come to the same conclusions that you have.Very good piece!

© You can just copy it and paste it. I have to check and see where it should go

I loved what you wrote. I am also sad that life has given you experiences in which you've learned these hard truths. I guess I'm fortunate that I haven't (yet) been tasked with having to forgive the unforgiveable.