Are there any local government offices that help the aging? We have one, they will schedule a home visit, decide what help she needs and provide her as much as possible. When my husband , who already has MS, had seizures in January, they helped us (he is 64), provided in-home physical and occupational therapy, as well as a Social Worker who still visits him once a week. And a wheelchair. The OT suggested I re-arrange some furniture to make it easier for him to get around. Dotmom, you are so good-hearted to help this lady. God bless you! Hope my suggestions help.

First, if she falls again, DO NOT pick her up. Call 911 and tell them the problem. They will send either the police or fire paramedics. They will make the decision and they are trained to handle these types of emergencies. Yes, she can refuse medical help, but it takes the liabilty off you.
Do you have a council of Aging, Senior Commission etc? Senior Center? Social Services at the hospital? This person apparently needs more help than you can give and you all don't want to be liable if something very serious happens. Find out the DD's name and have someone official contact her. She may not even know the condition of her mom. It could be insurance reasons, or maybe she is refusing to cooperate with the medical staff. Whatever it is PLEASE get some outside help. She also sounds like she has a bit of a horder problem.
I do wish you the best, and if I lived closer I would be glad to help you find help.

I second what Marie said.If she falls again, do not pick her up. Call 911. Do not ask if she wants you to call 911, just do it. Persons at fall risk should never ever be alone.

You are so very kind to help her. but as you stated, we all have our own problems. You could injure yourself trying to assist someone.
We all dread losing contol of you lives.
Search your county web site for senior assistance.
And yes, call 911. Here they have "chairs" they can use to pick them up. Many times a broken hip is why people fall. "They" used to think that someone fell and broke a hip. Now it is known that it is the other way around.

I have no suggestions, I just wanted to say God bless you and your neighbors for helping this poor woman. I hope you are able to get the assistance you need for her.

Yes, the police are accustomed to helping pick up seniors--it's one of the things they do. Please call them next time around.

As to help? First of all, the hospital social worker should have worked out these issues before she was discharged. I can't believe they sent her home without making sure she'd be able to manage. Since they didn't, I'm assuming she has medicare and probably some sort of supplemental insurance? or Medicaid? If so, and she has any qualifying health issues, she should be able to get a home health aid that her insurance will pay for. Someone needs to call your local visiting nurse association, have her evaluated and explain to the nurse what her financial situation is. Visiting nurses will provide: a nurse to evaluate health on a regular basis, home health aids to assiste with personal care, shopping, cooking, cleaning, laundry, occupational and/or physical therapy as needed. It was a great help when my mom was getting less able, but insisted on living her her apt.

The other option you might look into is volunteer organizations that help in these cases. There are organizations who provide help for specific conditions (the Cancer Society; Alzheimers, etc) and there are 'general' organizations like 'interfaith caregivers', or meals on wheels.

A good resource for finding what is available in your area is the county office on aging--why don't you give them a call tomorrow morning and see what help they can offer. They usually know what organiations are operating in the area, and have contact numbers for them. Good luck.

Thanks for the responses. Yes, we will definitely call 911 if she falls again. Being today is Sunday, we will get along as best we can for today, but tomorrow....we WILL locate some professional health help for the dear lady. I just don't understand why the elderly is being treated this way, why she was sent home before she was ready.

That's one of the reasons I hate hospitals. They release people to home when they are not able to take care of themselves. In my area, hospitals won't keep a newborn more than one overnight, unless the mother or child is seriously sick (like premature or with fever,etc). My Mother was released from a hospital on a Thursday in January and died Saturday, she had pneumonia and terrible COPD (emphysema).

Don't be so fast to say that the hospital discharge person didn't do her job. It may well be that this neighbor refused help, or refused to go to a nursing home for re-hab. Just like she refused to let you call 911. The neighbor could have lied to the hospital staff, "Oh, yes, I'll be fine at home" and they cannot keep her against her wishes.

Also talk to the manager at your apartment complex. I'm sure that the manager has dealt with this type of problem before, and may have connections to all the resources you need.

I know you want to help your neighbor, but there is only so much that you can do for her. And calling 911 is FAR better than trying to lift her yourself!

I agree with Sushi, often the hospital's hands are tied but they are easy to blame. Our healthcare system is often the culprit, but as soon as I read the post I wondered why she was not sent to an interim care facility. Don't hurt yourself Dotmom, and remember, if she falls again you could not only hurt yourselves but her as well. Call 911 no matter what she says.

Yes, it probably was not the hospital but rather the woman's refusal and/or hher insurance! Hospitals do not want their pts to fail and go on their mortality statistics. I bet it was a combination of the two.

How come the daughter isn't involved? Has she even been contacted? Does she know her mother has been hospitalized and has your neighbor called her daughter? That would seem like the place to start first, unless there is some estrangement issue.

You and your neighbors should've be arranging care for her unless she's asked you to, in my opinion. I'd suggest you ask her if she's been in touch with her son and daughter and whether or not it's Ok with her for you to contact them.

Regardless of son's job schedule or daughter's location, I would imagine that they want to know what's going on and help their Mom.

Since she definitely needs help--call the kids. So often we don't want to bother family, but they might be upset that nobody including the hospital contacted them. I work with elderly people; visit hospitals and care centers as part of my job and people overestimate their ability to take care of themselves. The number of elderly people who are still driving long past their ability to do so is frightening.
sushipup is quite right, if she told the hospital she had family waiting for her, they would release her.

Once again Dotmom, you simply impress me with your compassion and selflessness. You're something else.

With a fall, yes, call 911 and what the hospice they told us to do with my cousin when he slipped onto the floor (he didn't fall, was just fidgeting and was hanging over the edge of the couch and we couldn't get him back up so just let him slide down. Called the hospice for assistance, since that's what they supposedly were there for, and they said to call 911 for a non-emergency lift assist. Usually they send a squad for a cop to evaluate but it's normally going to be the fire department and possibly paramedics if available and needed that will do the lifting. The hospice said they might say he needs to go to a hospital but that he could refuse and they couldn't override it.

I'd contact her clinic. They might have some ideas for assistance. Does she or a spouse have military experience? The VA could become involved if that's the case. You might even contact AARP or something for suggestions. Don't overlook City Hall. Even call and talk to someone at the police & fire departments. They may have contact names and numbers for assistance.

It sounds like she needs to be in a wheelchair rather than using a walker. Could be she's a touch self-conscious about it and refuse to use a wheelchair. Obviously she'd need to get some furniture cleaned out. That's not a big deal though, as long as she agrees with it. I'm sure you could get some scouts, or people from the church, even some local youth groups to come and help move the furniture someplace. Where, would be the issue.

I'm sure the kids would want to know and might have some ideas too. Another thought is to contact the insurance company. Often they have advocates or something or alternative things to keep from going back into the hospital, since that saves them money.

So sweet of you and your neighbors to pitch in and help cook for her and stuff.

A lot of times the family is contacted or refuses to call the hospital back because they don't want to deal with the elderly person. We see it all the time. Or they flat out refuse to pick them up. Even after there is no longer a reason for the patient to be in the hospital. I don't know how many times a family member has told the discharge planners or doctors they will be picking up their parent at such and such a time and never come. It's really sad. Or they never answer the phone or call back after they've been left multiple messages. We've had to keep patients weeks after they were ready to go home because of things like that.

I also agree that she probably demanded to go home and refused help. See that all the time too.