(((( KathsGrdn))))

It will get easier; I promise!.

It will get easier and you will see your girl soar. The best is yet to come.

Just remember all the fun and opportunities ahead for her. She will still come home for many holidays and maybe even some summers. You aren't quite empty nesters yet.

I learned that the best time to call our daughter was Sunday evening. The weekend dates and parties were over, and the week ahead is being planned. So I got in on all the news, and slipped in a little advice too, often in the stories I related from my college years with tales about me or various friends. I shared with her some great lines some of my friends used on jerks they dated.

Take a DEEP breath, and sleep well! You did an awesome job raising two beautiful children.

PJR moved into his dorm, today, with his best friend.

So tempted to call my fella, but NOT! :o)

Thanks. I didn't think it would bother me so much, it's not like she's across the country and I know she'll be home for Thanksgiving. I guess it's just the end of being a full time mother.

Glenda, I'm trying not to be in her business all the time. We had a young, early 20s valor student working with us not too long ago and she said her mom was driving her crazy with phone calls. If she didn't answer back right away her mom would flip out. I don't want to be that mom.

Yes, it does get easier, Kath. It just takes a while to get used to.

Hope Lauren loves college and excels there. If the kids are happy, mama's happy. :)

If your kids are anything like mine; THEY'LL BE BACK. :) My daughter and her boyfriend bought a house and were supposed to move in today, but my mother in law passed away and her funeral was today. Moving day has changed. She moved back home in October after having lived in another province for five years. My oldest son has been back three times, and I lost count with my youngest son. But this is officially the last time I'll let anyone live in my house who isn't married to me.

It does get easier.

It really does get easier, I promise. And, yes, they do come back. Although our DD never came back full time, we did have her for a few summers, most breaks and occasionally on weekends. But unlike the high schooler "must-to-be-with-my-friends-all-the-time" kid, when she did come home she enjoyed being with us much more and we enjoyed the more independent mature person she had become. She now is a married adult living 1000 miles away, but we see her at least 4-5 times a year usually a week or so at a time and talk almost everyday.

These days, texting is a nice innocuous way of staying in touch without being too intrusive. Another thing DD and I do is keep a words with friends game going. It's something fun when you are just killing time and we often use the message feature to communicate. It is really rare for a day to go by without some form of communication, even if it just a word or two.

It is absolutely not the end of being a "full time mother". Your DD may not be physically with you full time, but you'll be a full time mother for the rest of your life. Goodness, I'm 59 and MY mother is still full time for me even though I only see her once a week, but I talk to her daily. In a lot of ways, my mother's and my roles have reversed, but after a rough day at the office or if I am upset about something, as soon as I hear her voice at the end on the line everything looks so much brighter. Only a full time mother can make you feel that way just with sound of her voice.

I heard Hillary Clinton quote someone who said that motherhood is like having your heart walk around outside your body and I'll add that that doesn't have a timeline. A funny and true story my mom tells is when she was visiting her older BF and her BF's mother. My mother must have been worrying about either my DB or me at the time, because she asked them, "When do you stop worrying about you kids?" Without hesitation, BF's 90 year old mother glanced at her 70 year old daughter, and said "I'll tell you when I get there." Point is you never stop being a full time mother and your DD needs you as much today as yesterday, just maybe in different ways.

Be there when she calls and give her your advice. she can take it or leave it. You did well raising your daughter. As long as she knows right from wrong and has a good head on her shoulders she will do well. Let her spread her wings and soar. Our granddaughter also just left for college. She is having so much fun and its only just begun for her.
Mary

Perfectly normal. Just let yourself feel what you are feeling. You are not officially an empty nester until your child is living on their own, in their own place.

You will still be very much involved with your daughter, just not not on a daily basis.
You moved Lauren in, you will go to visiting weekend, she comes home for Thanksgiving, then Christmas break. Before you know it, you will be helping her move back home for the summer. My husband always felt that the college school year was very short!

You can't help but be emotional. I really enjoyed experiencing the whole process though. I learned to text when we did a parent/student weekend. Parents were put in separate dorms, the walls were very thick and phone service spotty. So, my oldest taught me texting.

((((Kath)))) I hope you adapt to your new normal soon, lady. You've done a great job with your kids. Maybe you can start to enjoy some "me" time, soon. Or some new home projects! Try to find something fun to keep you busy.

You know the old saying about giving kids "roots and wings." You've done that, so you can be sad for a while, but let the pride take over that sadness. Don't worry, you're not losing them.

I remember that feeling Kath. However, I was so excited about my son's new chapter in life. We both worked hard to make this happen and the pride and excitement kept me from feeling so sad.

I left it up to him to call as often as he wanted and I was so pleased he wanted to talk to me so much I had to work out a payment plan with my long distance provider. :)

First day of school, camp, college, whatever! Same thing: "My BABY!"

I like the idea of setting up a Sunday evening 'check-in' call from home as a regular thing. Tell her she's doing it for Mom. (Of course she can call you anytime.)

I thought it would be the saddest day of my life...and it was....for about a week! LOL Kind of enjoy the "freedom". It would be even sadder if your child wasn't prepared or interested in going out on his/her own. Think of your kid living in your basement for the next 10 or 20 years and you will smile! ;) Seriously, good luck with your new lifestyle and hope there aren't to many sad days ahead for you!

I never shed a single tear! I love LOVE my empty nest!!!!

Well, she's been messaging me on and off since last night-lol. She left a few things here that she wants and forgot to order another textbook!

For me, the kids moving away for college was hardest with the first. And easiest with the third (the last one). With two prior experiences under my belt, I knew what to expect (emotionally) with the last one at the moment and subsequently. .

you celebrate between washing the ton of clothes they bring home and you can't wait for them to leave again!!!

we had a while before we were empty esters and couldn't wait! frankly I was tired of sports, hs, and driving 4 different places...

Kathy, TRUST me when I say 'she WILL back'! My stepson has moved back home 4 times. He graduated from college in August and I want him to stay as long as he feels the need. I'd rather he be living at home where I control the living expenses, as to have him try to live on his own again and have to clean up the financial disaster that created.

Most 'kids' don't make enough salary to support living on their own, so he can stay at home as long as he likes - it's waaaaay cheaper!

I can't believe it, Kathleen!! Seems like just a year or two ago they were starting school.

Glad to hear she's keeping in touch by texting.

And I kinda chuckled at the "Brick House" comment. :)

Good luck on this next chapter in your lives.

Wow where did those years fly to!!

As others said it will get easier,and she'll be home for holidays etc.
First we give them roots,then we give them wings and hope they soar,and i'm sure that is what Lauren will do,as she had a good upbringing.
Hang in there.
Kathi

Yeah, Charlee, she turns that song up and starts singing and dancing in the car...so did her friends and the first two female exchange students. lol

I was the last to leave the nest... the next week, my mom was coming down the staircase, hit the squeeky board [we kids all learned to miss it!!] and my dad called out, "Who's there?" My mom called back in a teary voice, "Who's left but me!!" We kidded dad about that one for a while...

PS send home baked goods!!!

HOLY COW! That doesn't seem possible!~ yikes! Oh, my. I remember with my only child moving on. It's hard. She will be home for summers and vacations, right? How far from home is it. It was tough cause Ryan was in North Dakota and Ohio. You have done an amazing job with both of of your kids. How much longer does your son have in college? Many hugs to you!

Kat, she is about 2 hours away. I have to go there tomorrow to take one of her books that came today (and a few other things she forgot). We rented it from Amazon.com. Yes, she will be coming home for holidays and summers.

Alex has one more year. He decided to do a double major and has 2 more physics classes he needs to finish that degree. So, he'll be going for 5 years. Then he's planning to apply for a job in Japan to teach English to Japanese kids. It's for one year.

Lauren will do great, she is lucky that Alex went first and I'm sure picked up on some stuff. I was going to ask about Alex! That is sooo awesome he is doing a double major! Is he still also doing engineering?!?! Living & working outside this country will be great experience for him as you know.

I wish I had had guidance going into college, thru out college and beyond. I am happy with how things worked out but sometimes I envy kids going into college now with all these opportunities ahead of them!

Start finding time for yourself now and the things you have put off doing! ~ liz

Once you get used to it, you will love having the house to yourself. Less cooking, cleaning and laundry. Maybe you will even have a social life.

Not less laundry ... when the kids come home for a few days, a week, etc. in breaks.

(They'll, maybe, do their own?)

ole joyful