I don't have to worry about the Mother of the Groom dress.

16 years ago

I found out yesterday that my son and his fiancee got married on Monday! I knew they were in Florida (he on business, she visiting him for a few days), but I had no clue that they were planning to get married.

They called me right after the ceremony, but I was at work and didn't hear my cell phone. So he called me yesterday, early in the morning, to tell me the good news. I talked to his . . . yikes! . . . wife later, and stopped on the way home from work last night to give her a hug and see her beautiful wedding ring. I hope this will all seem more real to me after I see the pictures of the ceremony.

I would have liked to have seen my son get married, but I probably would have cried buckets, so perhaps it's just as well I wasn't there. I love my daughter-in-law, and couldn't be happier for them. Her family will throw a party at some point so we can all celebrate together.

So now I only have the Mother of the Bride dress in my future . . . unless my daughter elopes, too. :-)

Susan

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Comments (34)

murraysmom Zone 6a OH
16 years ago
Congratulations!! Just make sure you have the best time at the celebration for them later. I'm sure you will.
ronf_gw
16 years ago
Congratulations, Susan.

Ron
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I don't know... I guess I didn't take my wedding so seriously. Ok, the bridesmaids are wearing black to an outdoor May wedding... the other colors are pastel green and yellow... (These colors aren't going to be worn with the black dresses?) I'm guessing the pastel green and yellow mean the flowers or the tableclothes, centerpieces, cake icing, or something, right???? And, it's probably just me, but I probably wouldn't try to match my dress to the decorations anyway. Plus, I really can't think of any color that compliments black, pastel green and yellow... maybe dark green? I attached another link with some dresses in the purple family that I think would look nice for a May wedding. The heck with the color of the program ink or party favors. Seriously, stay away from white, black and anything too bright and you should be fine. There are tons of Mother of the Bride and Groom dress sites to give you ideas. If it's a 4:00 wedding, generally dress for the evening... the formality of the dress will depend on the wedding. Here is a link that might be useful: Mother of the Groom
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Thank you all for all the advice and opinions. I have ordered the dress and I am going through with it. I did try to talk to the bride. I declined the nail, hair, makeup appointments on the reason that I will just not have time that day to attend them. She is now very angry with me because I am not "cooperating" with what she wants for her "special" day. My hair & makeup will not match the other bridesmaids or hers. Oh well, life moves on. I got the matching dress and I have a hairdresser friend who is coming to my house to do my hair & makeup(this helps me with time because I don't have to go anyplace). I am not the cake server, just the cake maker & set up. Yes, I will be attending the wedding anyhow....the reason I originally agreed....I would be there anyhow..why not stand up for her. It got way more complicated after that point. My husband will be helping me. He has to get ready for the wedding as well and has his own list of "chores" he is supposed to be getting done the day of the wedding. He will be getting the boys ready....we have 2. I will be responsible for our daughter. Not sure where the communication in the thread came from that said i had 3 boys....i may have typed something incorrectly. Bride is also upset that I am not allowing my daughter to attend the nail, hair, makeup sessions too. She is 8 years old and is supposed to be a jr. bridesmaid but IMO she does not need nails & makeup done. My friend is doing her hair when she does mine. I really am trying to make this all work. I have a very tight schedule that day. It keeps getting worse....yesterday the bride tells me she wants everyone at the wedding site at 2 pm....wedding is at 5. I just came right out and said....that is pretty much impossible for me with everything else but I will have your cake done and ready for the reception and myself & the children will be there and ready to walk down the aisle when its our turn. I know how hectic weddings can be.....I deal with brides all the time. I am a cake decorator. In the months of May & June, I make as many as 5 wedding cake per week to be set up and delivered. I can deal with busy & stress. NEVER, have i ever had a bride behave as this one has. Lesson learned i suppose. Someone posted something about my in laws loving me or trusting me. I'm not all that sure that its that but more that there is no one else for her to turn to, to get things done. She has burned a lot of bridges over time. & I am apparently glutton for punishment. haha Also, I did decline to host the wedding showers and bride is very upset because no one else did them so they had not a single wedding shower. I offered to help if anyone else wanted to plan them but no one did. Again, thank you all so much for your help!! Ill post back later and let everyone know how everything ended up going. Date is April 17th. We shall see....I will put my very best effort forth...that is all I can do. :-)
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I would like a wedding coordinators opinion - is the following in bad taste? or am I too sensitive..my son was married a couple of months ago, i was seated in the back table at the reception, by the kitchen, and prevented from being in the photos. When I asked the wedding planner about pictures with the grooms family and the mother of the groom she said, not on the schedule! I was stunned. The night before he told me I was the best mother in the world, of course I had just deposited $10,000.00 in his account. A month before the wedding the bride sent me the dress she wanted me to wear, she got it for $50.00 off Amazon, she wore a $10,000.00 Vera Wang that my son bought for her. Now there are hundreds of pics online with her family - not one of me.. They re indignant that I dare feel bad because I was seated in the back and didn't get my picture taken, They tell me that it was THEIR day and I should just keep my mouth shut..I didn't see it coming, although the bride said before the wedding that she thought me, a single mother, and my sons were too close..well, she's just done a great job of breaking that up. I feel completely shutout and it hs been devastating.. This post was edited by Serenitynot on Sat, Jan 26, 13 at 23:05
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Sidnee, I have the dress you have chosen and love it! I wore it to my neice's wedding last June and it was so comfortable. The fit is wonderful, it is a very "forgiving" dress, kind of hides the flaws lol. My best friend chose it as the MOB dress for her daughter's wedding 2 years ago, but in the long version. Glad you found your dress!
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bluejeans4ever
16 years ago
Congratulations, Susan! Your DIL is so luck to have you for a MIL!!!
lynn_d
16 years ago
Good for them! And what a ton of money they saved!
patti43
16 years ago
My first thought, Lynnd! Congratulations to the newly weds and hope they have a great party.
chisue
16 years ago
Wishing them ALL much happiness.

IMO you are well out of it. I hated being a MOG! LOL I don't do "smile and nod, smile and nod" very well for long hours.
foggyj
16 years ago
Congratulations! Their happiness is what matters. Glad it went well, and you'll have a great party. Put disappointment aside if possible. As long as they are happy.
alisande
Original Author
16 years ago
LOL I'm a good smiler/nodder, but I hate standing for long periods. Honestly, I'm not big on large, fancy weddings. I understand completely why they'd want to do this quietly and privately.

I'm looking forward to the party, though. Her family lives out in the country, not far from me, and I'm guessing it will be a casual, outdoor affair, probably with a band. They have enough space for some guests to pitch their tents and stay overnight.

I'm a lucky mother-in-law. This is the girl who came over in June when I was still getting over that fever, and mowed my lawn in 90Âº heat.

Thanks, guys!
socks
16 years ago
I can tell you have mixed feelings about this, but it is what it is, and they are kind to you and include you in their lives. Yes, you are a lucky MIL, even though it's a little different than you had thought. How fortunate you are to have a wonderful DIL. Hope the party is lots of fun.
casey_nfld
16 years ago
Congratulations Susan!
hayjud_mn
16 years ago
Congratulations!
I guess some people think it's the wrong way, but for some couples it is the perfect way. The big celebration is a lot of work and $$$, but it is still over in one day.
I'm so happy for you that your new DIL is a girl that you are very fond of. That really is a blessing!
lydia1959
16 years ago

Wishing your son and DIL a wonderful and long marriage!
The after party is the best part anyhow, right??
hgl_gaylemarie
16 years ago
Congratulations to the Newlyweds!
jennmonkey
16 years ago
Congrats!!! They did it exactly the way I would want to get married. Private small ceremony, big and casual party later to celebrate.
joyfulguy
16 years ago
I hope that you have great fun at the party and that you and the new couple have many happy times together.

If they had held it on our birthday, and had you been invited ...

... you could have attended in your birthday suit.

ole joyful

P.S. In which case, it's doubtful whether folks would notice whether or not you smiled and nodded.

o j
jannie
16 years ago
Congratulations to all! Glad you're not too bummed out at missing the wedding. Perhaps they could be talked into having a small religios ceremony, not a wedding, a blessing of their union? And glad the brides parents will be having a celebration for them. I knew someone who had eloped, then had a reception party months later, organized by the bride's mother.
alisande
Original Author
16 years ago
Truly, my feelings aren't all that mixed. I hadn't counted on them getting married in any certain way, so I can't say that I'm disappointed. I'm happy they're married, and I'm happy it went exactly as they had hoped.

Perhaps they could be talked into having a small religios ceremony, not a wedding, a blessing of their union?

Nice idea, Jannie, but it's not something that I'd be inclined to suggest, as I'm not the slightest bit religious. Spiritual, yes, religious, no.

My DS gets back from Florida tomorrow, and I'm picking him up from the airport. It will be amazing to see a wedding ring on his finger!! (This is a guy who never wears jewelry of any kind.) This will be very nice to see.

PS: From all these unadorned posts, it looks like many of you have successfully eliminated the advertising links. Maybe I should attempt to get rid of them one more time.
alisande
Original Author
16 years ago
I should add that I didn't ask her to mow the lawn. In fact, I didn't think she should do it. She was mowing, and my son was weed-whacking, and I told them it was way too hot to be doing those things. But they ignored me. :-)
glenda_al
16 years ago
Congratulations

May they live a long and happy life together
gemini40
16 years ago
Well congratulations, what a nice surprise!! most important you love your new daughter in law..Hope they have a happy, long ,love filled marriage.

June
Georgysmom
16 years ago
Good for them. They did it their way. We're going out to California in a few weeks for our sons wedding.....getting married on the beach and a cook out afterwards. I was going crazy looking for a "beatnicky dressy casual outfit" but think I managed to come up with just the right combo of dressy and casual.
kacram
16 years ago
Congratulations!!!!! woohoo!
I'm sorry you weren't there, but I'm so
glad that you like your new DIL!
Is it a case of marrying the girl next door9kida)/
or did they move there after their daughter
was grown?
nodakgal
16 years ago
Congratulations!
alisande
Original Author
16 years ago
She wasn't next door, exactly, but her family has been in this rural community for generations, and my kids were born and raised here. (I've been here for 35 years.) The bride and groom have been going together for a long time. (He's 31.) They got engaged last year.

The plan is for them to build a house on the part of my property, my DS owns--on the other side of the road, down the road from the barn. I'm excited about that.

Georgysmom, congratulations to you, too. I'm intrigued with that outfit. I hope you'll post pictures--and of the wedding couple, too!
FlamingO in AR
16 years ago
I know I posted to this earlier, but it's poofed.

Congrats, Susan! That's how Woody and I got married, we told the family the day after and not a single person was upset. Of course, it was a 2nd for both of us, but it was so easy.

Your new DIL sounds like a lovely person, I'm happy for you!
maire_cate
16 years ago
Susan, what happy news! Congratulations, best wishes and hugs to you and Joey and Leanne. That is just wonderful. And if you think it's going to be odd to see a wedding ring on your son's finger just wait until you're all out in public and someone says "Hi Mrs. ....." and you turn your head only to find out they're speaking to your DIL.

I think it must give you a great deal of satisfaction knowing that they're now officially on their journey together. Oh I do hope they had someone take photographs. I can't imagine that they wouldn't mark this momentous occasions without arranging for some photos. And I'm looking forward to seeing them.
Maire
alisande
Original Author
16 years ago
Yes, a friend/co-worker took pictures, and I can't wait to see them! I'll share at least one here........and I know all KTers will be gracious and not criticize her dress. I know it didn't look like a tent, and I know it wasn't fuchsia. LOL

Or the groom's clothes! (I have no idea what he wore, but I'm sure it wasn't formal.)

Did you run off, Flamey? Elopement sounds very romantic.
sjerin
16 years ago
Many congratulations to the happy couple! And happiness to you too, Susan. I'm so glad you took the elopement well and am sure you will enjoy the reception.
chisue
16 years ago
LOL about your DS and his ring. My favorite picture from our DS's wedding is a snapshot a friend of mine took. DS and his bride are making their formal entry to the reception dinner. They are both beaming, and DS's left thumb is 'worrying' that new *thing* on his ring finger! That's the photo I had framed for my desk.
User
16 years ago
Sounds like they did it their way, and that's a good thing. Congratulations on getting a great DIL.
sheilajoyce_gw
16 years ago
Congratulations. We eloped too after dating a few years. It was the easiest approach as we had no parents and little money.
alisande
Original Author
16 years ago
Thank you! As soon as my daughter gets the news from the bridal couple Sunday night, I'll announce the marriage on Facebook. You'll all think I'm repeating myself. LOL
trishaw
16 years ago
Well congrats to all! I am so pleased that they just went and did what suited them. It sounds just lovely. Your new DIL sounds like a keeper!

Trish
Georgysmom
16 years ago
Susan, I don't know how to post pictures, but maybe this will be my inspiration to learn.

dottie

I don't have to worry about the Mother of the Groom dress.

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