I'm so glad he liked it. I enjoy baking and have made a batch of Toll House cookies every week for the last 25 years. lol Oh my gosh our anniversary is next month. Guess I better get busy and plan something special. DH loves anything lemon so I try and make a lemon meringue pie when we are invited somewhere, so he'll have something for desert he'll like. He complains that he only gets one piece though! I took one to my aunt's for Christmas once, my cousin called about an hour after we left to tell DH that he'd just finished the pie and it was sooo good! DH was fit to be tied. I did make him another the next day. Linda thanks for reminding me about hollowing out the cake and adding strawberries and whipped cream I'd forgotten all about that one. Marion

I have been with my fiance' for fours. Well, broke up 4 times but always got back and worked things out. He recently retired and he was alright at first, then started to change. Yes, we fuss off and on, but couples do. However, from the beginning he told me how much he loved me and one day I will be his wife. Always told me everyday how much he loved me. Now I noticed that stopped as well. He went to his mothers one day and changed his password on his comp. He has never done that before. We haven't had sex in a long time. His daughter just got herpes and I know you can't get herpes but only by sex, but in my mind and what I have been through in my life having arthritis, I'm scared. I tried to tell him it's in my mind and I apologize not wanting his daughter near me. I have been been through a lot with medicines, shots and surgeries replacing both knees and my left hip. I have never kept him from his kids and never will. I love his kids and we get along great . I told him to visit his kids like I do mine. It's a 2 hour drive but well worth it to see their smiling face. He said, he shouldn't have to drive that far. So, he moved out. I'm still upset remembering the I love you forever and never leave you. Him changing so fast and told me I'm not happy anymore. Moved in with a family member he said. He told me he wanted to be alone to think. I feel like it's all my fault

I am not sure that I agree Rosewood, even though what you suggest is the direction most people are taking. I stand by my entries on this thread that I made on Wed. March 16, 05 and Thursday, March 17, 05. Scroll up. Please read if you passed over it, because I still feel the same today, ten months later. After hanging out in the step parent forum for awhile, my views on this are stronger than ever. Letter after letter talks about re-marriage after the divorce, and when many of these men re-marry, several of these new young wives on the forum resent and hate the children from the previous marriage...especially after they have new babies with the husband...and they want to have their own new little family, without the previous children, in fact, they want those children to just disappear! To some extent, I am now beginning to think that when we become parents, it is no longer about following our whims, or our feelings (which are fickle at best, and deceive us) but about what is in the best interest of the children we have brought into this world, and loving these innocent, beautiful children enough to fulfill our responsibility to them, by giving them the best possible childhood we can, whether we feel like it or not. IMO, when he made vows to love and honor his wife, and brought these two babies into the world who have their whole childhood ahead of them yet, he lost the right to chase after the new honey at the office. IMO, he has lost the right to whine and say he does not know if he is happy right now, and run around with the girl friend while he decides. It is such an incredible injustice to his wife and two babies, who trusted him to lead this family like a man, and put aside his childish whims. He is robbing his wife, by threatening her future, and the future of her children. It will affect them on every level, for years to come. He has robbed his wife of the ability to enjoy her new baby, and her two year old, because she must now worry where he is, who he is with, why hasn't he called, and the security of knowing their future is safe. Then, I imagine he will marry one of these honey's - and then, the step parent issues begin for these children. His new honey will hate money leaving her household, to his ex-wife, and his kids, and will resent her and the kids for this. It cheats his wife and children out of the future they SHOULD have had. A future with two parents who love them and strive to give them the best childhood they can. A family of their own, with two people who are willing to step up to the plate and do the right thing...whether they feel like it or not...with a smile for these beloved children. Giving them the gift of a family who loves them and are on their side rooting for them every step of the way. Parenting is hard under the best of circumstances. But we are called to do our very best, for these children, and not give up! There are days in parenting and life that we all will look at our spouse and wonder "what in the world was I thinking, when I chose him/her". Or we will look at them and may not feel anything at all. But on other days, we are so thankful that this person is by our side, and feel so blessed to have them share our life. Our feelings evolve over time, and can become so rich if we treat each other with excellence!

OK. Let's guess what he might be thinking/feeling. He made a lady pregnant and married young. During the infactuation phase, everything seemed ok, except he had a little nagging doubt sitting on his shoulder. Now, he 20 yr old and thinks, what have I done? Have I chose the right one? Will I be happy 10 yrs from now? The soul fire has gone out lately and I think that I could be more attacted and turned on by someone else. But, how can I call it quits and start over with a child. I feel trapped; I'm unhappy about it. Notice there is alot of "me" and "I" centered stuff in the above paragraph. He'll never be happy until he passes into a different phase where he thinks, "She's pretty good; Good looking, too. She a wonderful mother. I wonder if I could turn her into a tiger in bed? How could I give her a mini-vacation? The other possibility is that he is scared witless about the prospect of having another child. He sees the financial burden as too great for his career to support. The though of heavy responsibility can turn down the flame. Older men who are experienced and well extablished in the job world are more confortable with this, but for guys these days with the changed economy, that does not happen until they are in their 30s. Some men do well with the challenge of responsibility, while others wilt. If he's concerned about fathering another child, he and his wife should consult with a doctor about medical procedures that can insure no more children. In this case, it should be him that undergoes a procedure if that's what he wants. The woman should remain fertile just in case the marriage breaks apart anyway in the near future. He needs to consult with a therapist who can point out the positives in his wife and give him ideas of how to capitalize on this. The sex part will heal itself after he gains a better feeling and sureness about the relationship. Some therapists will "test" the relationship to reveal strengths and weaknesses. That would be a disaster in this case. Choose a therapist who looks for the positives and then works with those. This man needs assurance that 10 years down the road, he'll be happy with his mate, and will feel that it was a wise choice. Sure, there are others in existance that can be a sexual turn-on, but then, if the wife is too, isn't that the better situation? Those other side infatuations can have big, unknown negatives as well. Somehow, he needs to get past the age of 40.