hahaaa! cheetos! but i mean...just think of something really bad and be glad all you ended up with is cheetos. maybe it was a chipmunk or a squirrel. or someone who was like 'haha i'm putting cheetos in this plant gee i'm so funny' sigh. the mysteries of life.

Before I forget it, I signed DH up for Birdfeeder Watch last week, specifically after seeing Sara the Brit's thanks to you for mentioning it. So thanks from me too, Suzy. I wish I could remember the quote but it was about like this: "He was one of those who finished college and was content that he had completed his education". I'm sure we all know folks that consider learning a new craft or skill unnecessary but what joy they miss out on. We usually had some big project in hand at our old house but with lower energy levels now, instead of painting a lovely red wall, we've settled for a similar red for a wrought iron birdcage and some old plastic microwave dishes for plants. Looks great among the greenery. I'll admit to flitting...once I learn to crochet or batik and complete a few projects it's on to something else. I often return after a few years but not always...I think that intricate macrame wall hanging is destined to be an only child forevermore...LOL. I used to teach myself from books but now with the internet DH is honing his watercolor skills and I'm finding new inspiration for my collage work. The internet is a double edged sword, though. Hanging at the Cooking Forum resulted in some new cookware, knives and cutting boards...my present to myself. Intend to update cooking skills and recipes if it ever turns cold here...all doors open today again. josh

I haven't lost either of my parents yet, but the time is coming and seems to be advancing faster and faster. My father has had several close calls with death since November of last year and my mother's health is going downhill rapidly. Both have different health issues but the one thing they have in common is that we lost my sister to cancer this February at the age of 47, and then lost my son suddenly July 18 at the age of 30. My son lived with them and helped me take care of them. I have been their cook, errand runner, doctor visit taker, medicine getter, everything for years. I do not live in the house with them but saw them twice a day everyday until my son passed. I have been trying to heal myself so I can begin taking care of them again. Since my son's death both have been in the hospital for at least a few days each. We've had high points and low points in our lives and relationships but now we are closer than we have ever been. I know it's inevitable that they are going to pass, the question is when and will I be able to handle it? Having gone through the death of my sister who suffered horribly for several months before her death and then when I felt like I was beginning to process her death, my son choked to death. That threw me into a tailspin and I am learning to get through each day, one day at a time. I have learned that everybody grieves differently and at a different pace. If I feel the need to cry, I cry. If I feel that I can't get up and go, I don't. I do try to get some exercise everyday, walking the dogs is a good excuse for me to do it. I find that when I don't excercise I feel worse. Even stretches and yoga are enough to release endorphines to make you feel better. I want my son's pictures and things around me. I wear his sunglasses and have his pillow so I can smell him. My parents have my sister's ashes in their living room and Daddy puts his glasses on the box they are in every night. I do believe that when my parents pass, I will have the tools I need to cope. I will miss them more than anything but it won't be a new experience for me, other than it will be my parents passing instead of my sister and son. I spoke with my doctor and she gave me anti-anxiety meds to try for a month to see if I can get through the day without a breakdown, they seem to help but if they stop working I will consider antidepressants to help me cope. My thoughts are with you all who have lost your parents and I know I will be in your shoes way too soon. I just know that as bad as I will miss them, they are not happy being unable to care for themselves and be independent like they were their entire lives. It has to be hard for them to turn to their children to do all the things they used to do for us, even though we try to give them all the dignity we can. I will soothe myself by knowing they were not happy or healthy in their last few years and they will no longer be in pain or struggling to breathe.

I agree, but TJ, are you out there? We want to hear how things are going for you.