In my limited experience, you would need a Power of Attorney and Durable Health Care Proxy. That's regardless of whether you're traveling or not. And since you said not to tell you you need an attorney, I won't! (But you do ... :-) )

You can probably get the forms for those online. They might need to be notarized, too. But it's a good thing to take care of these matters whether you are traveling or at home.

You may have been dealing with the wrong attorneys in the past. Ours hardly ever charges us to answer questions like that. He only charges us if he actually does something (and for a POA for my aunt, he told me what I needed, and to go buy one at Staples; when I needed a document when I was settling my mom's estate, he just ran me off a copy--no charge). The right lawyer won't fleece you for answering that kind of question, honest.

You do need to make sure that whatever document you have executed will be valid in both your home state AND the places where you'll be travelling.

Sorry, know it's not the answer you want, but you DO need to consult an attorney for this. No matter what it costs to get the RIGHT answer, it will be far less expensive than getting the wrong one.

If either of have adult children, this figures into this as they are blood relatives, not just friends. But you do need legal advice.

And remember a Power of Attorney is only legal when both parties are still living - so if one party dies then the living one can't use the POA as a legal document to make decisions.

Your questions about POA and a durable Health care proxy go a lot further than insuring who would have the right to make health care decisions in an emergency. If you or S/O don't have the Health care proxy, in most states, medical personnel would not even let either of you go see the other in a critical care unit or even give you a diagnosis/prognosis or any other medical information about the other.

I worked with a young woman who had a chronic health problem, she and her S/O lived together, owned property together, but since they did not expect to have children....were not married. One day, she had a critical episode that landed her in the ICU, where her S/O was left pacing outside, not knowing what was going on or if she was even alive.
She survived, and when she was discharged a few days later, they stopped off at City Hall and got a marriage license...and then went back a few days later and got married.

No, you don't need an attorney but you DO need to sign the document and provide picture i.d. in the presence of a Notary Public - it is a legal document that can only be changed BY YOU. It will cost about $2 apiece for the Notary.

You need to give copies to your family, your physician (for your medical file), your pastor and so on. Put the ORIGINAL with your will and other legal documents. When you travel, carry a copy on your person.

Yes, I worked with this very thing for 5 years.

Here is a link that might be useful: http://www.caringinfo.org/i4a/pages/index.cfm?pageid=1

If there are children of either of you, real property, financial accounts, etc. you will do yourselves a huge favor and have it done by an attorney. They don't all charge an arm and a leg. Call a few and find out what they charge. It's fairly routine and not complicated unless there are many assets to be considered.

I would recommend signing several ORIGINAL powers of attorney. Some agencies require an original, rather than a copy. Alternatively, you can file the original with the county clerk/recorder, then get CERTIFIED COPIES as needed, if they are acceptable over an original.

A durable power of attorney is valid even if the person giving it becomes incapacitated. A (plain) power of attorney becomes ineffective if the person dies or becomes incapacitated.

We have had two instances in our family where POA/Health Proxy were (1) not prepared (the only information we could from hospital on the phone was that the person was in fact alive), and (2) when step-son gave POA/health care proxy to his loser live-in girlfriend. When he was put on life-support, the GF wouldn't let him go. His mother and sister were there and were helpless. He finally passed on his own. The mother couldn't even get a copy of the autopsy report.

HIPAA has run completely amok.

You can only have one original power of attorney for each person.

We have 3 duplicate originals for stepfather. All signed and notarized as originals.

Laws may vary from state to state, but this is according to NY state law:

"How many copies of a Power of Attorney should I sign?

"You are required to sign (execute) only one copy. However, it is not unusual for a Principal to sign several original copies. Banks and financial institutions, for example, generally require an original or a certified copy before allowing an Agent to transact business on the Principal's behalf. And banks and financial institutions frequently provide customers with their own Power of Attorney forms."

Thirty three years ago, my boyfriend and I were happy living together. we shared the bills, the housework and cooking, we saw need to get married.He was still sotre after his wife had abandoned him and served him with divorce papers. I had a broken engagement in my past. We got along great and saw no need for children. But then we compared the federal income taxes we paid as two singles VS a married couple. So he proposed and we got married the following June. It's been a great deal ever since. We later had two daughters, I was hospitalized with a stroke and not expected to make it, he was hospitalized with seizures just this year. Never had any trouble with hospitals or bills or anything.

I forgot to mention, the worst thing that ever happened was when we took a vacation to Mexico. I stepped on some glass and cut my foot. The hotel doctor charged me $100 cash to stitch me up. He would not accept my US health insurance.

If I were in your position, I would do the "Five Wishes" advance directive, because it is recognized in 42 states.

Here's a link to information on it, and you can go to the "Aging with Dignity" website and either order a form, or print it from their sample. Be sure to have it notarized and ensure the copies are available to your SO, medical professionals, etc.

Here is a link that might be useful: Five Wishes Advance Directive

Wanda, you are correct - this is a great instrument for directives. Check with a nursing home and ask the Benefits Coordinator if they have any extra copies of the Five Wishes Advanced Directive.

Jannie, if one is a spouse, that's a whole different circumstance. In most cases, Significant Others don't have any legal rights with regard to each other if it isn't legally in writing.

Thanks for all the info. HOWEVER, I guess I did not make myself perfectly clear. We BOTH have trusts, advanced directives, DPO's with our kids names on it. I just want something when we travel, IF a situation were to occur, he or I could make decisions.

What is a DPO?? I would still say, for what you are looking for and all other things being in place, the basics would be a DURABLE POWER OF ATTORNEY and a HEALTH CARE PROXY. These would be very simple to prepare and execute. The attorney who set up your trusts, etc. should prepare them for very little. I'm surprised he/she didn't do it already.

not only the legal papers but when we went on vacation i took copies of surgeries, medications, and latest lab results...

my friend who has a cronic illness, got referrals to drs in italy and france from her gp...

Oh duh - My own Sr. Moment - DPOA, Durable Power of Attorney.

Some health/injury issues need quick decisions. Can your kids act on a health related sitatuion on your behalf if you are many miles away? Just a thought..... You might want your SO to have a Health Care Proxy for traveling.

Thats exactly what I am looking for................A Health Care Proxy. Where can I get such a document?

Here's a site for nearly every document mentioned in this discussion, including the healthcare proxy. You can fill the one you want in right on the computer.

You can also Google "healthcare proxy" then add your state designation if you want a different one. HTH.

Here is a link that might be useful: Healthcare Proxy and other docs.

A health care proxy is strongly advisable regardless of traveling or not. Even if you're at home, somebody (or sombodies) should be appointed to be able to make health care decisions for you in the even that you're not able to. A Power of Attorney does not cover that (at least in my state).