Oh, one thing. Let me clarify when I say DIY. The only reason I said ours sometime looks like a DIY is that if my DH and I actually did it OURSELVES we would be in disaster city. I wish we were talented enough as those who I've seen on here do real DIY kitchens. I admire all of you who are capable of doing that.

I come from a family of perfectionists... There are a bunch of things that we've noticed... a little scratch on the new slide-in range, nicks and chips in the painted cabs, small nicks in the granite.... Nothing is really noticible unless you examine it closely, but when you realize how much money you are putting into it, you expect everything to be perfect....

We did ours DIY, so when I'm feeling self-critical and/or grouchy, I notice everything...When I'm feeling happier, lazier/more easy-going, I can shrug some things off. It sounds like some (or all?) of your issues can be fixed or improved. I say get it to be the best it can be, because there's nothing wrong with wanting jobs done right, especially when fixable...then let go of the things you can't change and enjoy what you have.

It's cost me thousands and thousands of dollars because I care about the little things. Is it worth it? Not today, but maybe in the future if our danged house is ever finished. In the case of your list, that's the kind of stuff I just wouldn't stand for.

On that grout line issue. You don't us grout on a change of plane line (backsplash to counter) because it cracks and flakes and well generally, because that's not how the tile code reads. You used matching caulk to the grout used above.

You cant just caulk over that mess. It needs to be taken out and then a proper caulk line put in place.

We have a lot of little things that we've "let go" because we want these people the heck out of our house. There were a bunch more big things (not cosmetic) that we didn't let go because we want this addition to last our lifetimes and then some.

When DH and I are feeling bummed about things we would have done more carefully if we'd felt up to doing them ourselves, we spend a couple of hours looking through new construction in our price range ($500-800K in the Mid-Atlantic). Those places are depressing! We got off so much better than we would have buying new.

Is your space a big improvement over what you had? As good as or better than the rest of the house? We try to focus on that.

I'm a perfectionist and that stuff drives me nuts. But I change what I can and eventually come to accept what I can't change. And over time things that really bugged me don't bother me as much as they did at first. Fortunately I had great people working on my kitchen and they didn't mess up and the few things that weren't quite right could be fixed.

You all just put a smile on my face Knowing that I'm not the only one :)

Rhome - You are so right. Even though I haven't done this work myself, I did pay a lot of money (to us that is) and you want it to look great. Some days, I'm totally fine with everything, because the BIG picture kitchen looks awesome and is 1000x better than the 1969 kitchen we bought. Other days when I'm grouchy, the little things bug me, because yes, we can fix them, but it takes time and effort and I'm a great procrastinator.

Igloo - Thank you for the tip. My mom said, "Oh that's easy to fix", but hasn't helped me yet. Little by little the grout is chipping away and it makes everything look sloppy. I will take a small screwdriver get the grout line out and replace it with caulk. One problem solved. Thanks!

lmarletto - Yes, the space is a huge improvement so DH and I are grateful for that. We bought a 1969 house and every square inch inside and outside needs to be fixed. So it's overwhelming at times. It's just that I wish we were really done done in the kitchen and could move on. Some things I'll have to let go. Some imperfection is what makes your house your own I suppose.

Gibby - Accept what I can't change. You're right. I also try to look at the blessings in disguise. Originally I had envisioned my bay window counter height, but when it came it was the same height as the other windows. Sits up a few inched from the sink with a white wood ledge. Turns out I LOVE it! Great focal point and display piece.

I spent much of my life expecting perfection and made some enemies along the way demanding things be redone. Then my
DH had a life threatening HA with open heart surgery etc during the time a project was being done. Roof shingles for house didn't quiet match what was already on our detached garage, I was upset for about 1 min and realization hit; Life can be to short to sweat the small stuff. Much more important things than perfection. Over the next 5 yrs I can honestly say I never noticed the difference again and no one ever mentioned it including lookers/buyer for the house.

This thread made me laugh because I was just downstairs complaining about some of these little things in my kitchen. When I opened the pantry cabinet door it slammed into the adjacent wall and it got me started on all of the little things that irritate me--like the door that bangs into a wall. Another one is my sink valence. Our installer thought he was being helpful when he drilled a 2 inch hole in the valence over our sink so that we could install a light fixture there--except we weren't planning on one. Now I have to find a light fixture that will work there and match my rather unique pendant lights. It irks me so much that I have to shop for a light fixture I didn't want that I can't bring myself to actually pick something to hang there. As a result we live with a bare light bulb instead. Then there's the hardware he installed on my mantel hood that wasn't supposed to be there. Many people here have told me it looks good, but I still hate it after over a week. Maybe I will find a way to live with it eventually. Finally there is the seven inches that we have to lean into our sink because the sink didn't fit in the front of the cabinet like the KD insisted it would. I know eventually when its all done I will get over some of this stuff (and hopefully all of it) but for now its bugging me.

I love this thread! See my thread about my counters and you will see why... I have this self critical thing that kicks in when things go wrong on this project. I feel like I should be this all knowing professional that can forsee all problems (I've tried to head things off, double checking measurements, sink sizes etc even if the boxes say it will work I double check etc.), and when things go wrong it is somehow my fault. This from a first time renovator - control issues much? It is a fine line figuring out what is bad work, and what is small stuff I should just accept and move on... cant wait to report back once I have lived in my kitchen.

More than they would anyone else, and let's just leave it at that....! LOL

I'm going to echo both cat_mom and lmarletto. Ours wasn't a DIY either so I can't just kick myself for the slip-shod finishes and the errors - which are large as life and twice as natural. We paid plenty for the project. On the other hand, at some point, I just wanted some of the blighters out of my house because in the course of addressing each point, they were wrecking three others.

But, yes, I know what each and every one of them are. And indeed they bug me.

Of course, some of the things that bother me are choices that I wish I'd not yielded on to my DH on or that I'd not settled on instead of keeping on looking. Oh well. In some later life, perhaps.

I believe I came out of the womb with the "perfectionist" gene, but after almost 60 years of living, a life-threatening illness, and a whole lot of, shall we say, "personal growth", I just choose my battles.

And I find that most of the little stuff is not worth a battle - my own emotional well-being is worth much more to me.

I'll still ASK for perfection, & point out anything I hope can be fixed, but if it can't be fixed, I give myself some time to be obsessed with it - 1 minute, 5 minutes, 1 day, a week, whatever, & then it's done.

The cabinets that didn't line up with the stove were disaster! Oh NO! EVERYONE will see this!!!! The granite guys helped me with a fix that sort of "fools the eye", & now, truly, no one notices it. Including me. I could list a dozen things in the kitchen that were devastating at first, but now, the bottom line is I Just Love My Kitchen :)

I do what I can, & once it's done, I let it be done. I'm a much happier cook, & I think my food is better because of it ;-D

I don't think that the things you have described are such "little" things. The grout shouldn't be in the crack. It should be caulk. It's totally unacceptable that the supplier would even send a warped cabinet. If the trim wasn't done properly it needs to be fixed.

For me, the only thing that works when I hire someone is to write everything down in geat detail and make sure that both parties have signed it. Then I stay on top of the suppliers and in the nicest possible way, refuse to accept anything that is not up to standard.

There is always a 10% holdback to ensure that things get finished as they should. No reputable contractor is going to have a problem with that, No fly-by-night is going to agree to it.

Standard varies greatly depending on how much I am paying for something. If I am buying an item that sells at the high end of the price range for that type of thing - it had best be perfect, but if I am "getting a deal" I don't expect to receive any service or support and don't expect to get first quality merchandise.

In some areas, it is not wise to shop for deals. In others, it is a waste of money to buy the "best".

If I was in your position I would start gently haraassing the supplier of the cabinet and the painter until I got satisfaction. Send letters, call, don't threaten, just complain pleasantly. It might take a year or so but sooner or later they WILL cave.

STOP PDX!!!!! No screwdriver!!!! No No No!!!! You need to go down to home despot and pick up a little tool they make for removing and filing down the little bit that gets left of the grout. A screwdriver or any other tool will end up scratching your counters or cracking your tile because it puts uneven pressure on an area. (Ask me how I know???? Six tiles in the middle of a shower that had to be replaced because I thought a chisel and screwdriver would do the job LOL)

It's around ten bucks, maybe 15...you will be happy you spent every penny!

I'm totally laughing right now, because I'm reading all your comments thinking, hmmm, okay, I'm not the only one. I can live with this, I can fix that, I can let this one go, etc..and suddenly I see a big STOP PDX!!!! I'm reading Igloochic's post, thinking what is she talking about? And then realize she's talking about me. I'm PDX. LOL!

Igloo - I actually have that tool your are talking about with the different pick heads for grout. I've never thought they were that good and had better luck with a flat head screwdriver. But that is when I've been working on old tile and grout. So, I will take your words of wisdom and advice and use the tool you're talking about. It's sitting in my bathroom window sill for another tiling project. Thanks!

Well I must say reading all your posts have helped me. One it does put things in perspective and like I said on most days, I'm simply thankful and grateful that we even have a house we can afford. There are some things that I can let go and others I will fix and others that I will call my workers back and have it done the way I want.

DH just walked out of DD's bathroom and said, "It completely feels like a new house in here" All is good :)

Sailormann - The cabinet itself wasn't warped, but the drawer door front somehow got bowed out slightly. It's a really big drawer, so I don't know if the way it got screwed into the drawer was off to make it bow out ever so slightly. The cabinets were custom done and they came out many times to fix and adjust and tweak things. This was the last thing they fixed for me and I asked them to spray it for me and gave them a can of paint. They said it was the least they could do. When it came back I didn't even look at the color, I was focusing on it bowing out. Later my mom (which is probably why it bugs me) pointed out the sanding and color was slightly off. I think my painter adjusted his settings on the sprayer so the paint wasn't so thick and it altered the color. We are having other cabinets built and painted so I'll see if my painter can fix the drawer front then.

Thought more about this post. We are nearing completion of a whole house reno, though small we did everything. I think I figured out something. With every step I think we scrutinize what was done. If we could all go away, have things done then return I bet a lot of what we see and scrutinize each day wouldn't be noticeable.

Eandh1 - So true! I did the same thing throughout the process. That's why sometimes I think buying new construction would have been easier. I wouldn't have got exactly what I wanted, but it would have been easier. Can't have it both ways I suppose.

Eandhl both of your posts are absolutely positively correct. I thank you for that. Yes I can fixate with the best of 'em but really we need to take a step back and see it for what it is.Thanks for shining the Reality light on us all.