That's wonderful!

Hooray!

I am so happy for you.

See - you do have much to be thankful for!!

Oh that's great Psuedo!!! It will be a very merry Christmas for you!

I didn't even know you have your own kids. You never mention them. I understand one is grown but where is your 16-year-old? Doesn't live with you?

I never mention them? ...maybe they aren't the reason I post. And I try not to compare my children to hubby's children but they are worlds different.

KKNY once told me I beam about my children but I detest my SC ... so I stopped writing about how great my kids are and find no need to mention them.

My son lives with his dad visits on weekends, vacations, and holidays. He wanted to go to HS in dads city not mine he lives 40 minutes away. My DD23 also lives in the same city has been on her own since she was 20 she is very independant, pays all her own bills. Works full-time and still goes to college on full scholarship.

Thanks to the rest for the congrats... :)

I will have a great christmas with my kids ... :)

Most of my last post was deleted but no sense raining on my own parade I'll save it for another time.

Two of my 4 SC told me they hated me this weekend and that I am not "family" to them.... all I can say is great I don't have to do anything for people who hate me and especially if they are not family.

Then coal for Christmas, I say. You don't deserve that, Pseudo. Don't let it get to you . . . or at least try not to . . . easier said than done, I know.

I really don't know how you have dealt with the abuse for all these years. And, no offense, but your DH doing nothing to stop the abuse is just as bad.

And iisn't it strange that your SC think you're so terrible, but your own bio-kids have turned out great?

So my christmas with my children was wonderful we had a great time ... loved their presents :)

Baked all kinds of goodies made their favorites... :)

Dinner for 12
Six Children used the fine "chinet"
Six adults my finest corelle

:)

SC arrived around 3ish battling through the door because SD got more presents at mom's house than the boys did ... and I knew that was going to happen so I bought extra for the boys. (I had the extras hidden and was going to give them another day but had them just in case)

Everyone but SD10 had a great day .... I swear she looks for ways to make herself miserable.

ashley, SKs live with pseudo, but Biokids don't. i think it was discussed here before how different could kids' attitude toward the parent they live with compare to the ones they visit. it is much easier to love a parent whom you do not see every day and who do no yell at you to do homework or clean your room.

really FD? My kids live with me and don't have the same attitude that my SD gets. In fact, I have three kids and they each have their own attitude and personality.

The difference? I am the parent and if one of my kids gets an attitude with me (and they have from time to time), I have the ability to do something about it. (ie. handle it) and when my SD gets an attitude with me and I try to handle it, her mom says I have no right to. Fortunately, I have a husband that will handle it for me... pseudo's husband won't handle it and neither will BM.

Every child is different, but I think sometimes the parent the child is afraid of is not necessarily the better or the worse parent. I have been told by therapists that it is normal for a child to be more relaxed, and less well behaived, with people he/she is closest to.

FD ... my children are old enough not to be yelled at if they do not do their homework or clean their rooms guess what when they were younger they were taught to clean their room and do their homework.

See I instilled those principles when they were very young so I wouldn't have that problem when they became teenagers. Would have enough to deal with teenage issues didn't want to deal with childhood issues when they were teens. And they are old enough to know if you don't clean your room it gets nasty if you don't do your homework teachers yell at you too. I parented my children I didn't let them tell me what to do I told then what to do.

SD was told to stop doing what she was doing or she was going to bed... and she told hubby I am going to tell DSS you were threatening me. (she seems to think she is in control)

I was on the phone with a male co-worker talking about work and SD listened in on the whole conversation after my phone call I went in and said I didn't appreciate it and she said I wanted to make sure you weren't cheating on daddy. (she seems to think everyone cheats on their spouses)

When I told her she couldn't have pie before we ate dinner she called her mother and told her mother I was mean and she hated me. (Guess she thought mom was going to come in my home and cut her a piece of pie)

Called her mother to come get her she hated it here because ...her uncle wanted to watch basketball game in the living room and she was watching disney channel and hubby changed it (I guess mom was going to make hubby change the channel)

pseudo you were raising SKs full time pretty long time, DH was custodial parent, so whatever was instilled would come from you and DH as custodial parents. why whatever is good in your kids comes from you but whatever is bad in SKs come from mom? they lived wiht you and dad full time so why blame noncustodial parent for whatever came out of it? it is funny how SMs blame BM for how kids turn out even if kids live with SM not BM.

imaommy I didn't mean attitude as negative attitude but just attitude in general. it is easier to idolize people whom you only see occassionally. you know that children, who barely know their fathers, often have this heroic vision of them. and sometimes children, who never see their moms, talk so warmly about them. and yet they often misbehave wiht whoever actually there every day. it is kind of hard to misbehave wiht people you do not see daily.

Where did I say I blame ONLY mom?

FD - I think you are way off base. It's been discussed before that SMs have a limited role in the influence on SC if the BM is in the picture. Even if they are custodial.

Pseudo's DH didn't have full custody for very long and definitely not the kids' entire lives. Plus, even when they did have full custody, BM was still WAY over-involved that they neither DH or Pseudo ever had any real influence on them because they were undermined constantly by BM.

So, really, BM and DH are totally to blame for the messes their kids are; BM because of her constant undermining even if she is advocating the wrong thing and DH because of his passiveness and willingness to let Pseudo take the fall so that she would have to be the one to take the action.

Pseudo - I'm so glad you had a great Christmas! You deserve it after the rotten year you've had!

I was thinking about your situation as I was going through something with FSD and my go-along-to-get-along FDH this weekend. Is it possible that your DH doesn't stand up for you because he knows that if something happens directly to you that you will do something about it so he doesn't have to?