I only got to read about half the posts, but I did just want to add one thing about spending too much around the holidays... We have a 3.5 year old daughter and a 1.5 year old son. A few weeks before Christmas, my DD sat on Santa's lap and told him that she wanted "the pony on TV that you can sit on and feed carrots." We finally figured out what she meant--she must have seen a commercial for "Butterscotch the Pony"--this pretty big stuffed horse that's advertised all over the place. We're suckers for our firstborn little girl (and just proud that she actually sat on Santa's lap and talked to him...not so last year!), so we look up Butterscotch the Pony...$300!! For a stuffed horse! NO WAY!! You could get a real pony for $300! I went into school the next day and told a colleague in my department about this ridiculous cost of a big stuffed pony (and the fact that it SOLD OUT at most places!). She just stared at me. She said that that's nothing...she usually spends over $1500 on EACH CHILD at Christmas--and her boys are 5 and 3. What could they possibly need or want to add up to 3K?? Needless to say, Butterscotch did not make an appearance under our tree...but we did get a bunch of other toys and fun things for our kids...and you know what my DD loved the most? An Ariel pillow that her Uncle gave her and a $10 Cinderella dress that Grandma got her. No mention of the missing pony (we did get her a neat pony/horse & rider set, which made us feel better...$17...not $300!) Sometimes Christmas can be really overwhelming, we definitely do lose sight of the real reason for the holiday, and it's sometimes better with less!!! :) Sarah

I had a couple of holiday surprise guests too--at noon, with the gathering scheduled to start at 2 pm, my son asked if it was ok for his ex-girlfriend to come! They split quite awhile ago (he broke up with her) but I knew they were still reasonably cordial. I'm not sure exactly what the status of their relationship is now but I have always liked that girl so it was nice to see her. And my daughter asked if a close friend could come. Friend is a Jewish vegan so it was a little challenge for me to ensure there was food she could eat. It all worked out and I am so glad I always have a few gift items on hand. Gave ex-girlfriend a Godiva chocolate bar sampler and a nice candle. Daughter's friend got an iTunes gift card and a joke book of the world's worst album covers (she and my daughter are both into the indie rock scene here). They both seemed to have a great time. Son and ex(??) went home to her place together, and my daughter's friend told her afterward 'Christmas is fun-I might have to find a Christian boy to marry!' :). Ann

My DH says I take WAY too much time making the decisions I have to make with our house projects. I'm the sole researcher, designer, planner and a co-hands-on executor (with DH) of our DIY building projects. It took us 5 years to do this last house. Plan, design, and contract the build. I designed and had a draftsman draw prints. I was the chick with the clipboard until the rockers left. From drywall on it has primarily been just the two of us. He has a full time job that is not building. We have made a good team, in that he has the expertise- I have the vision. We have put in countless hours making the decisions that go into these projects. Thankfully I found GW early on with researching windows. Google has led me to GW on numerous topics, which answered most of the trying technical issues. I usually only post when I get really stuck and need outside input and opinions. Mostly on decorating questions...;) IDK -- is 5 years too long to come up with a house from scratch? DIY? I have no idea; I do know my DH thought I belabored the process. As in it was a huge issue- how long I would take. But it was lots of design as you go stuff. However he is happy with the result.

Well, I just did the official count of roses after doing the annual June death march (to make a final judgment of roses that didn't survive the winter), and the present total came out to 1140 roses. I've officially joined the premium level of rose nut, which apparently hits if you have more than 1000 roses. Now as for time spent, I'm sure you're thinking that I either: a) spend every waking minute in the garden and have no other job, or b) hire out most of the rose care to someone. I don't do any of the above, since I have a more than full-time job and family with kids at home, as well as something vaguely resembling "a life". Also, I'd never trust my roses to any outside person, particularly the usual "mow and blow" services. We do our own lawn too. So what are the tips that keep me mostly sane? Well - as sane as anyone with over 1000 roses can be. 1. I don't spray anything. No spray is lazy gardening, and it makes the roses either shape up or ship out. I used to spray Liquid Fence once a year to discourage the bunnies, but I think they're so bewildered by the vast array of choices in my yard that no one plant suffers too much. Besides, my son complained of the Liquid Fence smell, so I don't even do that. Ditto for insecticidal soap - I've gotten a good balance between good and bad bugs and I don't see any rose slugs or aphids any more. 2. I get reasonably regular rains. As several folks mentioned, that is a key for successful gardens and a real time sink if not there. During our dry seasons in August (and this year, June) when we don't get any appreciable rain, I water all the garden beds for an hour a week each with overhead sprinklers. This involves setting the sprinkler on trips from inside A/C at 5 minutes a bed (maybe 1/2 hour total time). As I said, lazy gardening. I also plant all new roses with the Watersorb water crystals, so they have moisture reserves to protect them against dry temperatures. These crystals die down after a year or so, so they learn to survive on their own once established. 3. I don't weed, I mulch. As halloblondie said, there are few garden things that are more effective labor savers than organic mulch. For me, I can weed anything that pops up in my garden beds with two fingers, except dandelions or bindweed. 4. I make garden efforts do double (or triple) duty. For instance, I winter protect with bagged leaves rolled to the edge of the garden bed or stood around the particularly fussy tea roses in one bed. Those filled bags kill the grass at the edge of the beds, meaning I don't have to edge the beds. Then in spring, I spread the leaves around the base of the roses and other garden plants for mulch, and store extra bags for use later in the season. Leaves then break down lightening the soil and substituting for fertilizer by adding a little nitrogen. 5. Bundle gardening tasks, and make the roses mostly fend for themselves. I admire those of you who use the fish fertilizer sprays and things like that regularly, but I never seem to get around to it. I save milk jugs to fill with water when planting roses, and I have jars of fish fertilizer I always intend to use later in the season to perk up the newer planted roses, but I rarely get around to it. I sometimes add a little alfalfa, Ironite and 10-10-10 fertilizer once a year to the established roses, but I missed last year and haven't done so yet this year. If I successfully do the established fertilizer, it's usually bundled with pruning tasks in March/April so I spread the fertilizers around established roses before layering down the mulch. 6. Don't sweat the small stuff - roses are much tougher than you think. Chewed leaves, bugs, blackspot, wilting, lopsided growth - bah, you can handle it! And if not, you don't belong in my yard. 7. Monitor the important things. Canker needs to be dealt with swiftly and brutally in my yard, and Japanese beetles get no mercy and swift and (hopefully) painful death. 8. Enjoy the time you spend, and share the joy with others. Remember why you do this in the first place. You don't HAVE to work in the garden, you CHOOSE to. If it becomes drudgery, downsize and/or simplify. I agree with all of you that gardening is my #1 favorite activity in spring/summer and it's where I most want to be. 9. Take care of your body and listen to it. I have several herniated disks in my back, a hip replacement, rheumatoid and osteoarthritis, I'm in my 50's, and I'm allergic to everything that grows outside (so why am I a gardener??). I take care of my back by careful positioning and movement, stretching out frequently, and having treatments at home that compensate for full long days pushing my limits. I also make sure to stop and literally smell the roses, or hang out on the swing gazing at and appreciating a good day's work. Oh, and one of the two best activities to counteract arthritis?? You got it - GARDENING. The other is light weightlifting - both involve gentle weight bearing movement - and I get my weightlifting in my 50 pound bags of alfalfa... Movement is medicine, and I put it to its test. So how much time to I spend in the garden to maintain 1140 roses? Depends on the time of year: - Most of the summer into the fall, I spend maybe 3-4 hours a week on the weekend deadheading, cane monitoring/trimming, and taking pictures of roses. The latter occupies most of that time by far. I don't deadhead roses individually with so many blooms (like Darlow's Enigma), but chop off sprays when dead if and when I feel like it. Within this 3-4 hours is usually also monitoring and picking fruits and vegetables. - Spring pruning and rose planting season is more like 20 hours a week in the garden, usually long days both Saturday and Sunday. I also prune around 75 roses for our church, which adds another 20 hours I work in somewhere. The 20 hours in March/early April are pruning, inspecting, pulling off protection/mulching, and (maybe) fertilizing. The 20 hours in late April/May are planting and watering as needed (including the vegetable garden). - Late fall I return to 20 hours/week for a few weekends to plant the 1000's of bulbs I do each year, but the roses by then are on their own. After bulb planting is done in early November, I start collecting and placing leaf bags in my usual 3-4 hours a week max. See, it's doable! Not that I recommend this many roses for people who aren't insane, but I still have time for my family and work and church and cooking most of the meals, though I draw the line at cleaning house (that's why God made teenagers). Cynthia