step love

23 years ago

I am 30 and my step sibling is 26. We never grew up in the same home as our parents met and I lived with my mother and he lived with his mother and my father.

We became close when I moved to the town where the parents live and always had a very wonderful relationship. We have always been close in a way that always seemed different than the brother and sister role we were to take on. Well a few months ago, we met and talked and found we had feelings for one another. Is this wrong?

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Comments (12)

Mikkella
23 years ago
Why would it be, your not related.
brandym
23 years ago
Yes it is wrong. Even though you are not blood you are related. If this was going on with teenagers it would be called sick and the parents would be told to put a stop to it. members. Do you really want to put your family in this situation? Imagine the ridicule they will get from their peers. Not to mention to disgust of the other family members. It is very wrong in my opinion. Dont do this to your parents.
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spazkatt
23 years ago
I don't think it is wrong. You are not related by blood, just by circumstances.
darkeyedgirl
23 years ago
Remember the movie Clueless? With Alicia Silverstone?

Well in that movie she wound up with her "step brother". I think in the movie, her mother had died and her father had re-married later on in life. Or something. Anyhooie you are not blood related so I don't think it's gross.

Plus it's not like you were playing Legos together or sleeping in the next room, growing up as brother & sister.

You lived in separate homes.

Plus, you are 30, you have your own life. You aren't a teenager.

- darkeyedgirl
nookie
23 years ago
I agree with darkeyedgirl. As a matter of fact I actually know someone in the same situation. They are married ,have kids and are wonderful together. It is true that when they tell people about their relationship others have a tendancy to blink a few times but once you think about it they're NOT blood related. I'm sure that there will always be someone who disapproves but what should you care? It is your life and you are free to do what you want with it.
susan_in_nc
23 years ago
I know of a couple who were high school sweethearts. After college, the married and at the reception one's mom got together with the other's dad. So, a FIL became stepdad, worked out great for the couple and the grand kids who eventually came along (One MIL didn't adjust too well, but doted on other grands and interfered little)
Good luck
teeweeone
23 years ago
I guess logically it is ok but, it just sounds bad. I cant imagine being with my steps (not because they are bad people) because it just doesnt sound right! But, than again they are girls... lol...sorry...
nadastimer
23 years ago
I also agree that it's one thing if you were raised as siblings and knew each other since you were little kids. Then it's more like your brother and sister. Now right now my brother is to go on a date with my Dad's girlfriend's daughter. Someday she could become our step sister but her mother and my father only started dating about 3 months ago. The daughter doesn't live with her mother and we see very little of her...so I see nothing wrong with them dating, except that they best get along afterward if things don't work out!

~Leslie~
ponderinstuff
23 years ago
I don't think there is anything "wrong" with it, but consider all benefits and complications carefully.

There would be advantages like during the holidays there wouldn't be additional families to deal with.

On the down side. What if it doesn't work out. It could be devistating for all involved. A family torn apart.
suzieque
23 years ago
How 'bout looking at it the other way around?

What if you and he met prior to your respective parents meeting each other? In other words, you met a man who was unrelated to you in any way, and you fell in love.

Then, after you and he married, your mother and his father met as a result of your marriage. They fall in love and want a relationship/marriage.

Would that be wrong? I sure don't think so; I think it would be lovely! So why is this any different? You and he weren't raised as siblings at all. You're two people who met because your parents fell in love. I see nothing wrong with it at all. (although I do allow that, if there is disharmony in either of the 2 relationships it could make the other suffer - - but let's hope that everyone's mature enough to handle those difficulties).

brandym, could you explain your strong feeling a little more? Why would it be called sick if they were teenagers? What's sick or disgusting about it? They're not blood related at all. They're two people whose parents got married. If your daughter married someone, would it be sick for you to fall in love with that person's father? I'm not meaning to sound critical, just looking for more explanation about why you think it's "disgusting".
RosieL
23 years ago
How will your Mother feel about this son of the woman your Dad is married to? I could picture family gatherings from hell here unless all have a good level of maturity and acceptance. Whether all that would affect you or not is another question. From a social standpoint - you are adults. There is no blood relationship here. Hard to make any rational assessment without knowing all the people involved.
tlescak
23 years ago
In South Carolina it's legal to marry your first cousin. So what's the big deal about step siblings?

step love

Comments (12)

Mikkella

brandym

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