Hi Rubyvine, How have you been? I was in the same boat last summer my DH refused marble and I ended up going with granite. No regrets, I love my counters. I saw a granite at the stone yard last spring called Metallicus. It sounds exactly like Titanium black from Brazil. I remember it vividly. Gorgeous with lots of movement. I have no idea if this is the same stone. Hopefully Kevin or Bill, the stone gurus, can give you better advice. Names similar to Black Titanium are Metallicus or Metalicus, Asterick, Black Falcon... many names. My close friends have this on their cooktop. It is gorgeous. They have lived in this home 15 years and have had no issues with this stone. They do not know the name but it looks exactly like the slab I saw called Metalicus. ~boxer Stonedude.com has advice about stones. http://www.stoneadvice.com/ Asterix granite - anyone have it, considered it? http://ths.gardenweb.com/forums/load/kitchbath/msg031047456305.html Metallica / Metalicus Granite? http://www.thathomesite.com/forums/load/kitchbath/msg0215425531980.html Saturnia Granite Anyone? http://ths.gardenweb.com/forums/load/kitchbath/msg0313200015722.html Here is a link that might be useful: Metallicus Granite

"My children and I have open communication between us whereas she's never had that with her own mother so it's hard for her to just talk." This is only a valid comment if your children are OLDER than your SD. If you haven't raised a teenager, you can't predict what YOUR kids will be like when they get to her age. (and all teenagers are different) How do you know what she had with her own mother? Has she told you or are you guessing? Lots of teens find it hard to be open or talk to their parents even though they once had a close relationship with the parent(s). One thing is for sure, she is a product of her parents and it sorely irritates me when one parent, for lack of a better term, 'fails' to do a proper job of raising a child and when the child becomes unmanageable, they ship them off to the other parent. It's bad enough when both parents are involved ongoing but when they do it after years of keeping the other parent away or even if the other parent stayed away... you don't screw it up, throw your hands up and send the kid off to go live with virtual strangers! I'd suggest counseling ASAP for this girl but unless she wants to have a good relationship with her dad (and you), it probably won't do a whole lot of good. She has to want to benefit from it and probably at this point, all she can see is 'happily ever after' with her BF. "mother has not called anymore to check on her or anything. It's like she's happy to be rid of her." again, I cannot reiterate how pissed this makes me because the bottom line is her mom created this problem. If she kept dad away and f*cked up as a single parent, then how does she have the audacity to a) use dad as a punishment. b) throw the kid away and wash her hands of it. c) dump HER problems on you (and dad after preventing him from seeing her all those years). Of course, coming from a background where a mom would do that, it doesn't surprise me that a teenage girl would only think about how BF is going to rescue her and he'll be her family and they'll life happily ever after. That's a normal teen girl fantasy but when you have no real family in your life.. it becomes more important. At this point, how you and your family treat her (embrace her or just tolerate her) will factor in to her feelings of whether she HAS a family or not. If she feels like an outsider in your home and she feels abandoned or tossed aside by her mom (which seems true from your post), then she will latch on to something else. Lots of teen girls that long for acceptance or family, will have a baby or focus on a BF (or both) to achieve what they think what they want. It doesn't usually end up what they hope for *family*, it usually ends up with them being a single teen parent or feeling used by a BF and once again, tossed aside when he moves on... because most teenage boys are not thinking 'happily ever after'. As for you stepping into any role... let DAD be primary parent. If he is gone a lot, pick a time when he is home and he should sit down with SD15 to discuss what HIS expectations are and rules/consequences. Let HIM lay down the law and you might have to be the deputy that enforces it when dad is gone, but I would suggest trying not to make the rules too strict because you are not going to change SD from who she is.. but you need boundaries to maintain order in your house. Her dad needs to tell her that she is an example to the younger kids and as long as she lives there, she has to set a good example. My first thought was dad should have told mom no, SD can't come live there but then if he was kept away for so long and BM is 'throwing out' SD, then he really didn't have much choice, it's his daughter. But, if she is going to be there, she does need to realize that there are boundaries. The tough thing is if she refuses to abide by boundaries, sending her back to mom is not an option and neither is sending her to BF's family. But, like others have mentioned here, the behavior you've described here is not unusual for a teenager. I have a great relationship with my daughter (18) but she has her moments/days where I wanna scream! Refrain from comparing her to your kids because no two of your kids will be exactly the same as teens and your SD didn't have the home life your SD has. As the adult, you have to try to be more accepting and understanding of her feelings while trying to get her to understand how you feel as well. Good luck.

You are beyond stressed... aside from some of the excellent advice you have already gotten... I wonder have you had a girls night out since you have had Layla. After I had my daughter it was the best medicine in the world. (and I am a chick who generally hangs with the guys) A chance to decompress and just be me... not pregoo me swimming in hormones preparing for a baby... not tired new mommy me... not newly single mom balancing career me... just old fashioned out with the girls laughing without a care without men just L. I highly recommend it for any new mom. A good friend of mine is already looking forward to a girls night out and she still has two months before due date. It seems silly that one night out on the town can do so much but it eased sooo many things for me. It was like I was just going going going that I almost forgot the person I was. Even just dressing up without wearing business attire for work or jeans and t for home was a welcome change. That one night relaxed me, reminded me of me and allowed me to go back to being the chill person handling it all that I have always been. Ofcourse I didnt have another night out for probably about a year. But, I needed that night. My mom was the one who recommended it at the time. (such a smart woman) Aside from all of your worries and before you drive yourself crazy imagining all the stick thin fake breasted women your J could be talking to.... call up some girl friends dress up to the nines and take a breather... then take another look at everything and address each concern one at a time. Baby steps darlin'... first make you feel like you again... you know the hot sexy you musicians girlfriend you ;-)... who I seriously doubt would even be questioning wether he should be helping out more or not (given all of your advice to others I have seen on here)

Sorry Emily, but I don't see the problem. The leaves don't look dry from here & I don't know what you mean by 'crippled leaves' . I can't see the soil at all & I'd like to. Usually, folks have problems w/ their Fittonas drying out, where they literally wilt, collapse & then dry out to then become brittle & crunchy. Since that is not the case w/ yours, I don't know what you think is wrong. These plants usually need very high humidity, I've only been able to grow them in terrariums or the bathroom. How long have you had the plant pls, what kind of soil is that? Does the pot have a hole? Sorry for all the Questions, but all those factors matter in the care of the plant.