I have been with my husband for 22 yrs, married for 20. He had three children when we met, aged 12, 8, 6. I had (and still have) none. They lived with their mom in CA, but spent summers and some vacations with us in FL. I tried my best to be loving and fair to them, even when they were at their worst, and believe me, we had some pretty tough times. One rule my husband and I tried to live by was to NEVER speak ill of their mother in front of them. We had to suck up allot of **it, but I think that's one of the reasons we earned their respect.

One by one, after high school, they moved to FL to be closer to their dad (their mom eventually followed, too). We have an unbelievable relationship, I get "Mother" cards from all three of them, and they refer to me as their "bonus mom". I just love that term...so much better than "step". I refer to them as my children...and leave the step part out. I planned two weddings for our daughters and was so proud to be the mother of the bride in both of them. In fact, I walked down the aisle with their mom at our daughter's wedding in May!

I have three beautiful grandsons (5, 3, 8 mnths) who have no idea there is no blood relation, and love me as much as their other "Ammas". I care for two of them weekly and have the opportunity to help raise children from birth. Very exciting for me!

I just wanted to let everyone who is suffering to know that step-families can be successful and fulfilling. It's takes allot of hard work and a very supportive spouse, but loving relationships can blossom in time.

Good luck to all!