Is it over?
My soul mate and I met 6 years ago, married for three of the six years. I have three children from a previous marraige, one of hem has already left the nest. He has no children. When we got together he thought he would be able to handle living with me and the children. As we all know children, like ourselves, have issues.
I have to agree my house was not in order when he first moved in but in time rules were established and the children obeyed. There was finally some order in our home.
As time went on I could tell that his frustrations were increasing. He would tell me he loved me, never wanted to be without me, yet as time has gone on he realized he did not want to raise kids. Over time, he has distanced himself from the children. I am fine taking care of my kids, they actually are pretty good kids. He agrees to that. He just doesn't want to be around them. Yet, he doesn't want to lose me.
A few weeks ago, he told me he was going to move back to his home which is an hour away. He wants to stay married and try to salvage our marraige. He believes that we can continue to see each other during the week. He'll come over on the weekends when the kids are with their dad and in a few years when the kids are older and possibly moved out, him and I can share the same household again together.
I thought about it seriously. Yet for some reason, my heart and mind won't entertain it. It feels wrong. I told him, that I thought about it and I disagree. I told him I wanted to get help from an outside professional. I believe him and I need to weather the storm together, separation for three years, not an option for me. Maybe him and I have come to a crossroad, enjoyed our journey together, and now need to go separate ways permanently He said he would seek counseling with me, but doesn't see where it's going to change his mind. For as long as my one child lives in the same house as him, then he must leave till he leaves.