Your perspectives please
On another board (nothing to do with stepfamilies, btw) there was a big debate going on by the following scenario. I am curious to your alls takes on it. Most of the posters over there either had no children or were single bio-parents.
Okay, so 16 year old girl and a couple of younger siblings lost their mother in a tragic accident suddenly. Mother and father were recently divorced. Mother was primary custodian, the children only saw their father EOW.
So, after Mom's death they moved in with father. Father married TOW two months later. There were no plans for the wedding prior. 16 year old had a lot of problems with this, TOW or SM now and her did not get along.
Anyway, when this came up I thought that it was incredibly irresponsible of Dad to get married so fast. To me, it seemed like Dad did it so SM could do the full-time care of the children and he didn't think about his children just losing their mom and then having to deal with SM. Whom the 16 year old knew was the older woman.
Apparently on this other board, most people felt another way. They thought it was healthy for Dad to move on and it was okay for him to do this, the 16 year old just needs to learn that life moves on and suck it up.