In our situation. The mother had until their 18th birthday to repetition the courts for extended child support for when they were in college. I bet you that is typical. Your lawyer can help with that. We did not have to continue child support, but did pay one student loan on the middle one(because he dropped out and defaulted on the co signed loan) and the last one is in college, and we only pay her medical/health insurance bills/premiums now. But we have never claimed them on our taxes. Because they had to be living with you 6 months plus one day or something. So she got child support and tax exemptions.

It's a really, really long story. And not really over yet. Thanks to the hard work of our forensic accountant, we had positive proof that SIL, her husband and another brother had taken money that they shouldn't have, and used it for their own benefit rather than MIL's. The prosecutor's office was involved at one point and wanted to prosecute SIL. Now, she definitely committed a criminal act, and part of me would have been more than happy to see her end up paying for that--but there was another part of me.... Our fathers were best friends as kids. I grew up knowing this family, thinking of them almost as cousins, and ended up marrying the BEST one of them. SIL has been my 'sister' since she was in 8th grade. Our daughters used to refer to themselves as "best cousins, best friends". How do you sit back and send someone you've been friends with for over 3 decades to jail? I took a stand and asked that the prosecutor drop the case. I know--there was good reason to go ahead, but I just couldn't do it. Now, obviously, someone who would steal like that, doesn't have enough to their name to return what they took, right? They spent every penny, near as I can tell. Well, the lawyers got together and came up with a decent solution. The 'outlaws' had been 'caring' for MIL--and getting paid to do so (there's a formula for that by law). So they had to agree to continue to care for MIL, without pay--for YEARS. Also, because they'd already claimed their inheritance, so to speak, if MIL dies leaving anything, they get almost nothing, with the lion's share of the estate going to my husband and his one brother that wasn't involved in the thefts. Now, fact is, they've had to 'repay' only a pittance of what they took. And there's every chance that what little is left in MIL's name will be used for her care--which is as it should be. Still, the thieves have pretty much had to admit what they did, and they know that we have proof in black and white. They've become very quiet. There's another thing we feel good about. My FIL died under very odd circumstances. I'm not saying they did anything to cause that--but there are questions, not the least of which involves the fact that they had him quickly cremated (this was a man who was adamant about NOT wanting to be cremated). Anyway, in the beginning of this journey, they were not getting MIL the medical care she deserved, and I feared that they were trying to make sure she wouldn't last too long. As things stand now, after the agreement our lawyer forged--and not to get into all the details of the situation--they're better off keeping her alive as long as possible. I truly believe that not only did we conserve some of her money, but we probably extended her life by fighting as we did. As I've mentioned--this has been a long involved situation. There are so many details I don't feel free to offer here. I don't feel we've won completely, but I do know that my MIL is better off than she'd have been if we'd done nothing. Unfortunately, we had no idea what was happening until it had reached a crisis situation--and really--who ever suspects those they love of stealing from their own mother? It hasn't been easy, and we've felt very alone at points--because no one wanted to help us, and the thieves went around telling horrendous lies about us to discredit us. What they couldn't do, though was erase the paper trail of stupidity they'd left behind, so in the end, there was no way for them to deny what they'd done. I would say this--if you even suspect in your family, that someone might be taking what doesn't belong to them? Get a good lawyer, and demand an accounting. If everything's fine--great. But don't wait. As soon as you intuit something's wrong, get on it. It's best to stop this sort of hemmoraging as quickly as possible. Unscrupulous people can do a lot of damage very quickly, unfortunately.

Continuances are the DEVIL!!! When we went to court for child support, BM managed to get the first hearing by telephonic. When the Judge said he cannot do a hearing where there is evidence being presented with someone over the phone (because BM was arguing that our evidence was wrong & she had proof) so she got continuance #1. Our attorney charged us $300 an hour.. thank goodness she only billed for the actual time she had to be there for our case. She had another case in the same calendar. Then, BM showed to the second hearing... "oops! I 'forgot' my proof"... continuance #2 granted. We were the last case called that day so it was nearly 3 hours at $300 an hour. Of course she was fined $500 for not being prepared... of course she still hasn't paid it a year later! At hearing #3, she didn't even show up. She was supposed to bring her proof. ha, the court fined her another $500, which she still hasn't paid and then ordered her to pay $216 a month in support! I sat there calculating how many months of support it would take to pay the attorney.. just to get the order. Nevermind that it's been a year and she's paid a whopping... get ready for it.... drum roll please!!!! $429.66 (at least that what I figure when she's paid 7 whole payments of $61.38) DH still owes his attorney THOUSANDS. FIGHT TOOTH AND NAIL TO AVOID ANY MORE CONTINUANCES. ASK THE COURT TO ORDER HER TO PAY SOME ATTORNEY'S FEES. (sorry to yell but I get so outraged at continuances!)

rgreen: "2) Huh? I haven't said a word about anyone either being allowed, or not allowed to get married." Actually, you have. "Using the term 'whackos' is an example of a person who metaphorically places themselves in the middle of a crowd, and points at others and says... "look at them. they are different, and crazy. We should not have anything to do with them or their ideas." No, it is not that at all. Using the term 'whackos' is done when one identifies that such a person is being irrational in their thought process, i.e.: "whacko". "t is intolerance and judging at its worst. It's one step away from being the enemy you claim to stand against." No, it is not. Wrong again. and "enemy"????? Good grief. "Tolerance is not only accepting that people act and think differently from yourself, but also making allowances for those differences." No, it's not. "Tolerance" is offensive. It's putting up with something you don't like. So I have tolerance for right wing religious loons. I put up with them, but I don't like them. What you are trying to refer to is acceptance and embracement. Totally different things than tolerance. A gay friend of mine once told me that he is so offended when people talk about "tolerating" gay people. "Following through with the reasoning found in your comment, people who have a religious reason to not perform same-sex marriages should be barred from serving in such Government, and civil service positions that are given authority to perform marriages." Correct. Fire those guys in Texas. They're imposing their personal whackadoodle religious views on the government. That is not supposed to be done in the US. "So, a religious litmus test for who gets to work in Government!!!??? Wow... talk about a slippery slope?" No, of course not. You're a Christian/Muslim/Hassidic/ Hindu…fundamentalist and you want to work for the government? Sure. Go ahead. But leave your religion at home when you do. If you can't, then no, you can't work for the government.