No,I wouldnt say you're wrong to be thrilled.Sounds like she adds alot of hostility to the enviroment. It's funny how one unhappy person can make everyone miserable. Sounds like you and your husband did your best.Also sounds like SD just uses her dad as a scapegoat for doing things she shouldnt be doing (not coming home on school nights?)
Stay on top of the child support thing though,you dont want it to accumulate too high.

Hey coolmama- the entire arrears-that would have been "zeroed"-but wasn't b/c the papers never went through- amount will be paid immediately.

I also want to clarify for other readers that her leaving is not what I (the "evil stepmother") WANTED. What I wanted was for her to take advantage of the opportunities for psychological repair and benefit from the amenities that our lifestyle allowed in order to become the best person she could be. Unfortunately, the situation deteriorated to the point that her leaving was what my DH, son, and I NEEDED.

After re-reading your post again,all I can say is that it really sounds like you went through alot. It also really,really seems as though you have tried so hard to get this girl help and to show her she is loved. You gave her private schooling (which not many people can afford) and counseling.
Honestly,I dont know what else you COULD have done.there is no shame in feeling relief that she is gone when it sounds as though she has caused alot of heartache and grief. You are only human and can take so much.
Even if this wasnt a step issue,a bio child with these problems can be just as trying,so please dont beat yourself up.

mmommy- You have endured so much. I read with great empathy your posts. It truly sounded like the trouble this girl was going through was very deep... and you know what? These posts many times are like journal entries, where we can say so much and have a sounding board to bounce off of... As perfect strangers that only read your journals, it's really hard to "judge" (unless it's something blatantly wrong). I can only try to imagine your relief; please keep posting and let us know how life does change for you at home.

MMommy,
I feel your pain... read my post problems with 19yr old step daughter... I know the relief that her moving brings... It is not that it makes you actually happy, it frees you and sometimes when dealing with extremely difficult abusive children that free feeling is all you can achieve. You can not force them to change, but you can refuse to watch them self-destruct taking down anyone in their path. Take care and best of luck