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suspicious

17 years ago

So I am a bit suspicious of BM today. Just got off the phone with her. She called to ask me if we planned on signing ss up for any sports this summer. I told her that he has been asking about swim team and we were planning on that. She said she got a flyer about t-ball near her home and had wanted to sign him up for that, and she would pay for it.

I told her that we had asked him about spring t-ball near us and he was not interested but that he keeps asking about swimming so we are going with swimming. I said that two sports in the same season would be too much for him and we want him to focus on one thing at a time. I then told her that we would appreciate help paying for swimming and told her the cost! She said that she is not working but will help as much as possible?? (Not working but could have payed for t-ball???)

So I am confused.

What were her motives behind trying to sign him up for t-ball near her? Is it to try and say "well he has practice on ____ and ____ each week and games on _____ so he should really stay here those days."

And then try to weasel her way into having him move in and go to school next year by her because then she could say he is already there 3 days a week and made friends he will go to school with???

I know before she told the girls they are of age to chose who they want to live with. So is she going to try to win them over and get them to want to move in with her so their brother will follow?? She did tell my dh before that if she had cs she could have supported herself and the kids! And I know she is not happy with her bf....maybe she is thinking of leaving him and having all 6 kids and lots of cs to live off???

IDK what to think! What do you think??

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Comments (6)

mom_of_4
17 years ago
Maybe she made a new friend whose kid is in t ball and wanted to look like super mom...

That is our bm's MO... whenever she changes her viewpoints on something or comes up with something for the kids to do... its because of a friend or bf that is already doing that with their kids or thinks it is 'the best thing to do'

case in point ... BM was adamantly against the kids going to the feeder middle school for their current elementary school. (they go to a school in a predom poor and well not good neighborhood..but a good school ... ironic) But, as we were talking about middle schools the other day (since ss will be in middle school next year) she suggested we check out ___ school because so and so's kid goes there and she says its a great school blah blah blah... "Um bm that is the feeder school for elem that you didnt want the kids to go to" "Oh well we should check that one out" (Translation I should check it out).... whatev..

Who knows what crazy will do... I usually just file tidbits away that seem suspicous and keep my ears open for more if it comes along. Dont stress just keep your ear open.
lamom
17 years ago
Sounds suspiciously like a control thing to me. T-Ball near her house she can pay for, swimming near you she can't. She may genuinely think T-Ball is a good idea but since you nixed it she is nixing the cash. Tit for tat. Just sigh and stick with your program.
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mom2emall
Original Author
17 years ago
Your both have some good points. I bet it is something like she has a new friend or neighbor whose kid is in it...or maybe someone in her own family mentioned it to her. I know her sisters sons all played t-ball...

And I am sure she will not help with swimming because it was not her pick.
lamom
17 years ago
Mom is probably right and it's normal to want your kids in activities your friends kids are in. That may be part of it too and there is nothing wrong with that. She won't pay for swimming because that's not what she wants to do.
mom2emall
Original Author
17 years ago
She won't pay for swimming because she only pays for the things she wants! She pays for Halloween costumes and other useless items. Never pays child support, medical expenses, school costs, or anything. I guess it was stupid for me to expect she pays for any of an activity HE wants.

Plus, even if he did want to play t-ball we would not sign him up near her home. We would do it near ours. She sees the kid once every month or so at best right now.....so I know darn well transportation to practices and games would be mostly on us.
finedreams
17 years ago
she is onto something. maybe starts wiht kids being there over summer and then gradually moving in. it could be OK with a normal mom but taking in consideration her lack of involvement, lack of job and excessive number of kids, it is not a good idea. pay attention though, she might be onto something

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